Community Chat

[Moonchilde]

@LilacTree, from the little I know of your daughter's history, and what you've said in this thread, she's probably pretty depressed and feeling "why try?" about pretty much everything, and who could blame her.

I'm sure she could benefit from counseling and/or medication, but there are always the issues of paying for it and her acknowledging the need. Those are the tricky parts :-( Is she amenable to therapy/anti-depressants at all, do you know?

[QueenDanceALot]

---

@Moonchilde wrote:

---

@QueenDanceALot wrote:

I don't understand equating introspection with laziness.

I can think of a couple people I know who are lazy and not introspective in the least.

---

Introspection is usually part of introversion - the "inner life." Many extroverts generally consider introverts lazy because they are usually not go-go-go get it done people physically.

---

I would disagaree with those extroverts.  Introspection does not require someone to be introverted.

Lots of people who are introspective are "do-ers" and "go-getters".

[tansy]

Being introspective and laid-back aren't mutually exclusive to me.  I am both and I also manage to worry about my family but no longer feel totally responsible for their lives.

ETA:  while responding, there were more posts with more info, @LilacTree.  I was not swiping at you but stating how I'm handling stress:/

[tansy]

---

@ChynnaBlue wrote:

I don't believe being introspective and being laid back are mutually exclusive qualities. Some people are laid back because they're introspective and comfortable with what they find within themselves.

---

Ah, you put it so much better than I did, @ChynnaBlue.

[LilacTree]

---

@Moonchilde wrote:

@LilacTree, from the little I know of your daughter's history, and what you've said in this thread, she's probably pretty depressed and feeling "why try?" about pretty much everything, and who could blame her.

I'm sure she could benefit from counseling and/or medication, but there are always the issues of paying for it and her acknowledging the need. Those are the tricky parts :-( Is she amenable to therapy/anti-depressants at all, do you know?

---

@Moonchilde

Oh yes, I know all right.  She gets furious if the word "depression" is even mentioned.  No one disputes her disease (Lyme, and now meningitis) and she attributes all of her attitudes on them, that she has a diseased brain.  She takes medication, I don't know what kind, and she sees a Lyme specialist (who I don't think is doing anything for her).  And any therapy is out of the question.  Yes . . . tricky indeed. 

If you've read about chronic Lyme, they are all like this.  It is not recognized by the medical community.  She is now saying it is really a viral infection started by Epstein Barr.  She no longer believes I have autoimmune diseases, as she doesn't believe they exist.  She says my illness is Epstein Barr also (even though my disfigured hands are obvious). 

I don't want to go into any more detail than this . . . but I can imagine you have guessed this is my most critical issue these days.  I believe she is deeply depressed, but she is a full grown woman and I have learned not to try to discuss this with her.

[LilacTree]

---

@tansy wrote:

Being introspective and laid-back aren't mutually exclusive to me.  I am both and I also manage to worry about my family but no longer feel totally responsible for their lives.

ETA:  while responding, there were more posts with more info, @LilacTree.  I was not swiping at you but stating how I'm handling stress:/

---

@tansy

I didn't see anything from you that was offensive to me.

[Moonchilde]

Yes, @LilacTree, I get it :-(

We had issues with my sister, who died of complications of diabetes. She refused to take medication, refused to do a single thing a doctor ever told her, and basically let herself get to the point of no return. She had lifelong depression and refused to consider the possibility. She cut herself off from family and pretty much slammed the door except on her terms.

I know it's frustrating and worrying for you, but you can't fix it for her and she can't fix the Lyme disease. You have to let her go through all these stages/obsessions with what it "really" is, because it's all she thinks she has right now as far as hope. At some point she'll realize on her own that things don't add up - and then she might go on to the next new discovery. There really isn't anytging you can do but nod your head :-(

[ChynnaBlue]

---

@tansy wrote:

---

@ChynnaBlue wrote:

I don't believe being introspective and being laid back are mutually exclusive qualities. Some people are laid back because they're introspective and comfortable with what they find within themselves.

---

Ah, you put it so much better than I did, @ChynnaBlue.

---

It was a team effort, @tansy. I liked your example of being worried about your family but also knowing that you cannot be responsible for everything about their lives.

[wilma]

I think a lot about things - too much. I never make snap decisions.  I come from a family of worriers. Being married to a laid-back person has been both enlightening and frustrating. I find it very insulting when others tell me to relax or lighten up and not take things so seriously.  Asking me to change my personality traits is telling me to change who I am. I think our society can benefit from various types of personality traits. 

[Pqfan]

I would love to be  laid back.

I always have something churning around in my head and the only time I get a break is when I am sleeping.

It could be anything happy or sad or in between.

The brain is always in go.

It really is tiring to be me sometimes.