Community Chat

[Abrowneyegirl]

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@violann wrote:

@Abrowneyegirl- At the facility with which I am familiar, a client who has exhausted personal funds becomes Medicaid eligible and care continues as initially paid for. 

I have no experience with any other care facilities, so I don’t know where this philosophy comes fro, or if it is a universal practice.

The facility in question is a “private for profit” facility.

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It is a "shell game,"  ask 100 questions, get everything in writing or consult with an expert navigator.

1. Most AL's  do not have a continuum of care process
2. AL in most states have to have a % of beds that are Medicaid eligible that % maybe be 1% so if those beds are taken by another resident(s) too bad--move out
3. If your level of care exceeds the legal limits determined by your state you have to be discharged to the next level of care AND start paying at the higher $$
4. In the AL industry it is common to declare that the residents needs exceed the facility's level of care JUST at the TIME they are running out of money.  Now it is the families problem to find another facility with no money to pay for it.

Bottom line never assume!!!  Ask lots of questions, do lots of research and do not rely on others experiences.  The laws change all the time and everyone's financial and medical situation is different.

[chrystaltree]

That's probably true of most affordable assisted living places; although, none of the really affordable.  I think you are right, she's too young for that type of place and not infirm.  I feel so sorry for her because no one should have to live in a place they don't want to be in and it's heartbreaking that she has no social outlet there.  She needs to be in a place with residents in her age group who are active and mobile but just need assistance with daily living activities.  That's why it's so important that people visit many different places before they make a decision.  And to actually spend a few hours there.  However, the reality is that most assisted living for older, sicker residents.

[patbz]

Does your sister have control of her funds or do her kids?  If she has any money she should hire an elder care advisor (don't remember exact title but I hired one to access my parents care plan -- about $200-$400 for accessment).  Or intervene with kids and suggest they do this.  The professional will talk to her, institution etc make sure she is where she should be, that cleanliness guidelines are observed, suggest alternatives and modifications.  If she is so healthy why is she there?  Is it the MS?

[bakergirl]

Your post really touched me. My mom passed ten years ago yesterday after being in an assisted living facility for 7 years. She hated it but had refused to look at others before we decided on the one she lived in. She had a bedroom and bath and very small area to sit and meals in the dining room were mandatory unless you were sick or if the staff were willing to bring meals to room. I visited her every day at first and brought extras like cookies and fruit. Food is generally not very good and yes these facilities are very expensive. But SOME are better than others - There are Quaker run ones in this area we would have preferred for her - some Assisted living and Independent living with infirmaries on site.

As my mom fell into deeper dementia, I went more often and was on nursing and management  to get things done.

Your sister is younger than I am - does not sound like she belongs where she is. Would home care assistance be possible? Sorry to be so upfront but .......oh by way, she cannot be forced to stay if she does not want to - does she still have her own place.....

[151949]

I see advertised on TV with Joan Lunden a free service for elders called A PLACE FOR MOM. They assist you to find the right place to live. Within your budget - correct level of care etc. She should find out about this service and use it if it's available where you live. I would google A PLACE FOR MOM .

I looked it up - the number is 866 -343-8925

[RetRN]

I feel so sorry for your sister, I hope this can be resolved for her. Since her mind is good and she is mobile this has to be very depressing for her. I'm not sure why her kids would want to waste her money this way when it is clearly not necessary.

[Jordan2]

@chiclet, I am saddened to read about your sister. Someone in their early sixties isn't considered old anymore. I take care of my 90 year old mother, yes it would be easier on me to put her in an assisted living or nursing home, but I just can't do it. It's too bad one of her children can't take her into their home. If she is that unhappy, someone should shop around for another place that's a better fit for her. Good luck to you and your sister.

[chrystaltree]

"Active" does not mean that she doesn't need assistance with the activities of daily living.  Her family isn't wasting her money.  She has MS and while she can get out and about, probably with asstive devices like a walker or cane; she needs assistance with personal care, meals, housekeeping, perhaps medication management.  The woman is just in the wrong facility for her....but it's possible that nothing else was available.  

[chiclet]

I am original poster and when my sister had her stroke she fell and hit her head on the coffee table.  She was fuzzy at first and seemed to be living in the past but that cleared up after a few weeks.  During that time she signed power of attorney to her daughters who drew out all her money and put it in their names to pay for this assisted living.  My sister feels that at 4000 a month she will be broke soon and then what.  I have no say in anything but just listen to her and feel so heartbroken for her.  I think independent living would be good.  She has MS but it is not degenerating fast.  She seems to be stable in that regard.  I guess I am just venting because my friends don't like talking about depressing things. I don't either but I just need somewhere to let it out.  She misses her dogs so much and being able to walk around outside with them.  Thanks for reading my post and for your suggestions and prayers.  I appreciate it so much.

[SeaMaiden]

@chiclet    Who is paying for this expensive care? Does your sister have her own money? Is  she totally financially dependant on you.....her family?

  If not she should look into getting an apartment and having help come in daily with meals and driving her about and such. Why is she is such a place when she is not happy?????