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@Tique wrote:

@panda1234   my first thought was the same as @CelticCrafter's; however that was immediately followed by a question. Is this party being held at someone's home? If it's not at home and money is being spent for a venue, gifts are probably expected. If they're expecting second gifts and you don't take one, next time around they'll do you a favor and exclude you. Do whatever you feel comfortable doing.


@Tique  This is being held in a home. I do not think I will be bringing a gift.....enough is enough.

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@pigletsmom wrote:

Since when do they give parties for kids going away to college? They just had graduation parties with gifts? That's enough in my opinion.


A party for your kids leaving town sounds weird enough to me but I would just assume it's a nice get together before the kids leave. No gifts reguired.

@pigletsmom It is weird. You are right, they just had parties with gifts from me for this one too.

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@NicksmomESQ wrote:

  I get invited to “gift grabs” all the time.This is how I handle them.If I’m close to the person I go & give a gift. But a smaller one than the one I just gave. If I’m not that close I don’t go & don’t send anything.

   A couple of years ago I was invited to a birthday party,a graduation party, & an engagement party all for the same young man.I got all 3 invitations within about a week.I went to the engagement party & skipped the other two.

  It’s not my responsibility to help someone pay for their venue.I’m a generous gift giver but will not be taken advantage of.My gifts are based on who is getting it & how much that person means to me.I’ve given bigger gifts at house parties & smaller ones at country clubs.JMO but it all depends on the situation.


@NicksmomESQ You got hit with those three invitations. Some people have no shame.

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@janey2 wrote:

I would never go to a party without some type of gift. If you feel insulted that they seem to be asking for another gift, do not attend the function and just send a card.

@janey2I agree with feeling awkward walking in empty handed. I am mad they are asking for another gift so maybe I will give them a card. 

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No I would not give them another gift. I think the best way to gift them is to create awareness that gifts are not expected or required for every milestone in their lives. That will serve them well going forward. 

"Empathy is a superpower"
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No - I would not bring a gift! Does every "party" require a gift? A young guy is moving on to a new job and people think that requires a gift? And his brother is going off to college and that's another party with a gift? If you feel close to these guys, then go to the party and give them a warm hug or best wishes. I question the motives of the parents who think two more parties are in order after graduation parties....enough!

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OMG, I have never heard of this. When my daughter went off to college 6 years ago she went and that was it. 4 years later when she graduated with her BA we gave her a party.

Sleep sweet Bo 3/19/08 8/4/18
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I wonder if a great number of people weren't available for the graduation party due to competing graduation parties or vacations.


Maybe this is a way to capture the people who couldn't make the first party and inviting everyone again so that people don't feel left out.



QVC Shopper - 1993

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Wow...I guess the days of having just a graduation party aren't enough for some people.  I always thought of the graduation party as not only a celebration of the graduation from high school, but also the celebration of the graduate now going on to the next part of his/her life either being college or going out into the work force.  Seems strange to have a graduation party and only weeks later, a "going away" party.


If you went to the graduation party and gave a gift, I see no reason to feel like you'd have to go to this "going away" party.  You already gave them well wishes and a gift by attending the graduation party.  People who may have not been able to make it to the graduation party would be better suited to attend the "going away" party in my humble opinion! 

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I went to a first job send off barbecue a few years ago. I didn't take a gift; I honestly didn't see any there. We will be attending one next month too. We already gave a nice graduation gift, so I'm very comfortable just going to the gathering and wishing him well! Smiley Happy