Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 7,598
Registered: ‎01-22-2012

If you must go to therapy BEFORE you're married, move on to the next one....

Super Contributor
Posts: 344
Registered: ‎08-06-2014
Super Contributor
Posts: 456
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

I had a neighbor once -single guy -then his girlfriend and her daughter moved in.  I did not care for her and was happy when she moved out.  However, they apparently had reunited months later and he sold the house and moved into whatever house she had bought in the interim.  That was like 6 years ago and about 4 years ago they got married and are still married.  So it can work.  In this case the daughter was older and likely in college now or graduated.  But if this guy has younger kids that will be in the home it could be dicey if one or more of the kids do not care for Jill.  I personally never dated men with kids - not something I wanted to deal with.  I wish Jill the best!


Another story - I had another neighbor - divorcee with 2 sons.  One autistic and one with psych issues.  She did not keep track of those 2 and they would go around breaking stuff.  She bought the older one an airsoft rifle and he would walk around shooting animals and birds.  She died.  The boys had to go live with Dad who had been remarried and living in the next county.  That marriage broke up within months of those boys moving in with "Dad"!

Honored Contributor
Posts: 16,096
Registered: ‎01-06-2015

@febe1 wrote:

If you must go to therapy BEFORE you're married, move on to the next one....

Really? Going to therapy before you get married is the healthiest thing couples can do. Certainly better than getting married then living with problems that could and should have been worked out beforehand. And better than existing in an unhappy marriage.


So much judgement and holier than thou here, but of course that's not surprising 

"If you really want to shock the world unleash your kindness"