Among Friends

[Happiness Is Inside JOB]

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@IMWwrote:

I think as women get older they become “invisible “.

I have experienced this myself. I started to feel it when I was maybe 50. Now I’ve adjusted and don’t expect it.

When I do get compliments it is a pleasant surprise.

I have learned to treat myself very very well, that helps a lot.

If the low self esteem really troubles you, you might consider therapy, to help get you over the hump.

Good Luck.

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I just turned 50 (when tomorrow) and I notice I don't get much attention from MEN or compliments anymore.  I "KNOW" I have some nice clothes, Issac, Bradley Bayou, Linea but sometimes I find....If you look nice everyday people tend to STOP complimenting you.

I just try and not let it bother me, but it is different when you used to get a lot of looks/winks/comments from men to then got to NOTHING!!!

[Elri]

@HouseMouse

Maybe the compliments are used as icebreakers amongst the other ladies.  Perhaps they already feel comfortable with you. 

Many times people compliment someone wearing a new style. Because it is an obvious change, some feel the need to make a comment. 

You say you know when you look nice.  You look and feel younger than your age?  Those are advantages!   Go out for a good time and have no expectations.  That way, you won't be disappointed.  Be interested in other people and their stories and soon you will forget about being self-conscious.

P.S.  If you wear the same style clothing most of the time, get some nice costume jewelry or a beautiful scarf to punch it up a bit.  Get a new handbag.  Women always notice handbags.

[YorkieonmyPillow]

@Elri   Yes but does one want compliments from women, or from men?

Or is that another thread?

[Elri]

@YorkieonmyPillow

Oh, I see, Yorkie.  I think she was referring to the ladies.  You know, the air kissers.

Since she is divorced, the other ladies might whack their husbands for complimenting her.     

I  

[Tinkrbl44]

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@IMWwrote:

I think as women get older they become “invisible “.

I have experienced this myself. I started to feel it when I was maybe 50. Now I’ve adjusted and don’t expect it.

When I do get compliments it is a pleasant surprise.

I have learned to treat myself very very well, that helps a lot.

If the low self esteem really troubles you, you might consider therapy, to help get you over the hump.

Good Luck.

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@IMW     @HouseMouse

This is the key point in this thread, IMO.   If the OP has serious self-esteem issues, a few compliments here and there will mean nothing in the long run ....  and she still needs to work on those issues, either with a therapist, or whatever.

I just don't buy that she gets no compliments because everyone must be jealous of her!   

Funny, but no one here has asked about the AGE of others she is expecting compliments from.  Example ... if she works in an office and most other female co-workers are in their 20s and 30s, it's possible they won't notice "clean classic clothing".    

There's really no way to accurately determine how the OP is perceived by others, and the "vibe" she gives off.  

IMO, compliments aren't going to change much one way or the other.

[beckyb1012]

I do not find that true at 56.  Family and friends still compliment and even strangers do in a check out line or whatever if I happen to be wearing something they like.  I try to do the same daily for strangers myself because it always perks up someone's day to be noticed.  The only thing I started noticing in the last couple of years is that most of the compliments or approaches from men were now in the 60 to 70 year old range.  I am not interested at all, but still when I realized the men in their 50's who used to look now are looking at younger.   The 70 year olds are doing the looking at the grocery store ect.......  It made me pause at first then smile and just walk on since that is all we can do.

[Catlady Nicole]

How about this for irony.....I went vehicle shopping and yesterday and I met with a new saleswoman.  Through the course of our discussion she asked my age, (it was a very casual conversation and I wasn't offended), when I told her, she was shocked and said I looked 10 years younger!  Granted, she's trying to get me to part with a lot of money, but hey, I'll take it.  Funny thing, I was having what I considered a very bad hair day 

[cherry]

If you feel like that , perhaps ,you should ask someone if they think this is a nice color for you, or ask them about your hair

You might get a compliment ,or some good advice

[Tinkrbl44]

By the way ...  not all compliments leave you feeling good.  I remember going out a store as two younger women were walking in .....  I was about 40 and they were about 22.   

One of the women looked at me, gasped and said "oh my gosh, what a beautiful jacket .....  my grandmother would LOVE that jacket .... "     LOL