Q Talk

[KaySD]

This morning, I wanted to hear some "feel good" conversation--some nice, pleasant voices talking about some nice, pleasant things, eve if they were doing it to sell things to me. I turned on QVC, remembering there is the nice, pleasant kitchen show on Sunday mornings. What hit my ears? Some vendor on the phone, solemnly assuring listeners that his seafood was cleaned by "dozens of ladies."

Yes, I do know that in the "real world" such comments are commonplace and tolerated without much fuss. Yes, I know that anyone who does push back is labeled with one of the epithets that refer to women. Yes, I realize that the vendor might actually have all women employees (though I wonder why). And he might not have "meant anything" by saying that (but what did he mean, if he didn't "mean anything"). Yes, I know the QVC host is no doubt a decent person who wouldn't have said that, and might even have called out someone saying it, if they were in a personal setting.

Nevertheless, somehow I just snapped. I said a swear word and turned off the program, and vowed that I, at least, would not be buying anything from that company, ever. Petty? A mountain from a molehill? Yes, I can see how you might think so. But not if it's the hundred thousandth zillionth time I have heard similar gender-related judgments being voiced, over all the decades of my life. And without a scrap of awareness that it might in fact "mean something" to the other half of the population. Or that it's not just the words themselves but the underlying disrespectful attitude they represent, that is truly objectionable.

Didnt we go through all this 50, 60 years ago?

I'm sick of it. I'm done with it. I am not interested in excuses. I've heard them all. I don't want any apologies. I don't need the mean mutterings, sotto voce, about my reactions. Yes, I hear them anyway, loudly and clearly.

Come on, QVC. Give that guy a talking to. Make him stop, even if you can't change how he thinks. Tell him the profits from a few dear shellfish aren't worth it. And give your hosts some words they can say to distance themselves from such attitudes, without losing their jobs. 

I wish you all well.

[I am still oxox]

Wow. Have you been been inside  to long. This is such a little petty things to worry about. We're in the middle of a pandemic people are dying. This is all you have to complain about. I would like your life

[ThinkingOutLoud]

Do you really think the person meant to be offensive???

I highly doubt it so I suggest not taking it that way. Maybe giving people the benefit of the doubt is in order. I'm also sure you wouldn't want the same judgment put on you so...

[alicedee]

I don't understand what was so upsetting about what you heard.  I would assume from what was said that he contracts the product cleaning with a company consisting of a couple dozen female staffers.

Maybe it is a business set up to provide work for battered or homeless women, for all we know.

Nothing I would think twice about, but since you were so enraged, you did the right thing for yourself to turn it off.

[Big Time]

Agree.  Shows unconscious bias on part of the vendor. 

[Love my grandkids]

@KaySD Geez louise I can't even imagine what your blood pressure must be. I'd hate to be in your line of fire today!

[happycat]

Well, @KaySD, sorry for ya. I tuned in, I like it and I bought me a TSV. 

Not sure why anyone would be offended by that, seems like one would have to get up on the wrong side of the bed and just be looking for something to get offended by. 

Maybe you should try to get over yourself.

[kitcat51]

Being offended is the new American pastime...good grief.

[BlueFinch]

Perhaps he meant it as a compliment, because he views women as the most careful, when it comes to 'cleaning,' often difficult shellfish.  If I had heard him say it, I probably would have thought -- fantastic, then it's likely done right, but that may just be MY bias.   

[PamfromCT]

@KaySD, I agree with you.  This man is certainly tone-deaf.  At my age, I have been through it all, seen it all.  If people don’t get it, they never will.  If people get it, no explanation is necessary.