Kitchen

[PamelaSue72]

If I didn't want to share a recipe (and that's rare) I would simply say that it's a family recipe. I would never share a recipe and purposely omit an ingredient. That's just rude and mean, IMO. If somebody tries that recipe and there's an ingredient missing, what a waste of time and ingredients that would be if it didn't come out right!

There was one time that I did not share a recipe and (ironically) it was on this board. The only reason I did not was because the contained lard and I could just hear the food police having their snit over that; you all know how that goes around here. Easier to not share the recipe. There have been times when I really wish people here could Private Message in order to talk; that way I could have shared the recipe with the woman who asked me.

Nightowlz, that's just terrible what your dad's second wife did to your mother's things.

[Lacey1]

I honestly try to give a recipe correctly, but many times-I change the ingredients every time I make something. I will gladly show someone that's interested how I make things. Many times my 'secret' ingredient will be a technique or tool.

BTW: I belong to another forum that has a great number of men cooks. They use lard and/or bacon in every other recipe. If you post a vegetarian recipe-they get mad!

[Tique]

I am one of those people who always tries to change/add at least one thing to a recipe to make it mine. I'll admit in the past when someone had asked for a recipe, I have given them the original one - not my change or addition - but I stopped that a couple of years ago. As someone stated above, even when you give someone the exact recipe including amounts and even brand names, there's a strong possibility that it won't turn out exactly as yours.

Nightowlz, I'm very sorry to hear about what was done to you after losing your mother. Almost that exact thing happened to someone who I met immediately after we both loss our mothers. A part of me wants to feel badly for any woman who is that insecure but I can't.

[Suzeecat]

I would share. What's the big deal, you don't want anybody's cooking/baking to be as good as yours?

I think it's deceitful and doubly cruel to give a recipe that you purposely changed just because you were too "nice" to tell them you didn't want to share. In other words, you would rather someone went and bought all the ingredients, took the time to follow the recipe, and let them feel bad when it doesn't turn out?

If you are always changing the recipe yourself anyway, you should just say "this is the recipe I started with, but I always change it up a little".

[FUTURE]

I always share. It's a recipe, for crying out loud! That being said, if you choose not to or the person that gave you the recipe asked you not to, that is your decision. What I think is rude is giving them a recipe with incomplete or incorrect ingredients. If you do so, you're essentially wasting their time and/or money, in that they make it expecting it to turn out a certain way, when you know full well it won't. Just be nice and tell them you aren't at liberty to share.

[Pook]

I will always gladly share a recipe. What's the point of keeping it to yourself? To omit an ingredient is just mean and it's better to just say you don't give out your recipe. I'll even put any changes I have made at the bottom so they know what I made was changed somewhat.

I remember trying to get an Italian cookie recipe that I absolutely loved that was sold at her church's regular functions. The priest introduced me to her so I could ask her for the recipe. The women who made them was in her 80's and she was just not willing to share it. She said "" You seem like a nice person but nobody gets my recipes!!""

She took the recipe to the grave with her and not even her children or grandchildren had it.

[ChynnaBlue]

Are you going to be using these recipes to start your own restaurant? That's really the only reason I can think of for needed to keep a recipe a secret.

[Catbelly]

I have a friend who years ago (before computers) gave her sister her ""Hoagie Dip"" recipe. Her sister then sold the recipe to a local deli for a few thousand dollars - they then sold the prepared dip in their store ! My aunt makes incredible cakes and won't give up her recipe - same thing for her baked beans. Although if I had that cake recipe I'd be HUGE. LOL

[just4me]

I would never sabotage a recipe.

[mousiegirl]

On 3/6/2015 Nightowlz said:

I think they should be shared. What will it hurt. Wished I had all my moms recipes. After she died & dad remarried all moms stuff was thrown out, taken to good will etc. The woman my dad married did not want any of it in her house. Dad was not aware of this until after the fact. She should have gave us her recipes, cookbooks & other possessions. She even cut my mom out of family pics. Share them while you can.

Too bad you didn't go to your parent's house afterward and taken what you wanted as I would think your Dad would have wanted you to have her things. That woman should have invited you over to the house to choose what you wanted, not just disposed of your Mother's things. I can't imagine a reason why she just wouldn't have given everything to you, that would be the normal rational thing to do.