Community Chat

[spud188]

The Community College here has a class for Displaced Homemakers,they help you start on the road to a new life,getting a GED,Job search skills,confidance building.Maybe your shrink can help you find such a group.

You are very brave for coming forward and talking.It can't be easy being you.

[Burnsite]

So sorry to hear of your situation.  ((hugs))

As your biggest wish is to get further education, my advice is to try an online course and see how it goes. If you have less than 2 years of college credits, try a community college online course. (Don't do a for-profit--their statistics for graduating people are often bad, and they make money from the student loans.)  Public unis are non-profit, but there is more of a bureaucracy.  Still, see an adviser at your local--or read the catalogue and take an online course you'll need in your probable major.  Or maybe even just take a course, like Creative Writing, that you've always wanted to take.  Whatever will cheer you most. This is a tough situation and do what willl lift your spirits.

If you do well on that course, a scholarship and classes on campus might be possible.  But you could ease yourself into coursework in more familiar surroundings (your computer, your desk) first.

[Chrystaltree2]

Well, obviously your problems began long before he divorce.  Your downfall started while you were married and that led to the divorce and losing your family.  I don't think you need a divorce support group, I think you need a therapist to help you deal with whatever is going on with you.  You can't "fix" anything in your life until you "fix" yourself or at least come to terms with the past, make peace with it and move on.  If you were a friend, I would strongly recommend that you see therapist and perhaps look for a part time job.  The money would help but mostly, I think you need to stop focusing on your problems.  You probably do that 24/7.  A part time job would give you few hours of day, a mental "time out" and you'd establish a work history.  I think you have to re-build yourself if you have any hope of establishing a relationship with your children.  And you can!  But it won't happen overnight, you have to work to make it happen.     

[IamMrsG]

Hsawaknow,  have you considered approaching your estranged family and asking for forgiveness?  

[NeNe1010]

So sorry you are going thru this. This post and the responses are evidence of alot of people sending you good thoughts. I have been in this state before and literally your nerves are shot and your adrenals are exhausted so you are physically as well as emotionally compromised. What brought me out of it was a period of time on antidepressents and anxiety meds supervised by my Doctor. It helped me bring things back into focus. There is also a CD that helped me to understand what was going on with me physically. I still have it - it is called Pass through Panic by Clarie Weekes. They also have it in book form. I got it on Amazon. Hoping the best for you.    

[AngusandBuddhasMom]

Sorry that you are feeling so bad. That being said you seem to be selling yourself short. Obvioulsly if you can get to this website and type you have some basic skills. I suggest you find a basic job and go from there.

If you do not want to go to a jr college etc then just find a job any job that will give you some money and self worth. Once you have that under your belt move to the next level. It takes hard work and you have got to put your feelings aside so that you can function. 

Literally one foot in front of the other.

I raised my child as a single parent and no it is not easy but you are past that and you need to reevaluate what you are capable of doing. I know you miss your family and that is understandable. But that is keeping you from moving forward. Its hard but put them on the back burner for now. The only one  you should be concentrating and putting all your energy into is you.

I wish you well and a lot of love and luck.

[LyndaGee]

Hope your situation is ironed out soon to your satisfaction.  You seem like a smart woman, and you will make the right decisions.

[Shorty2U]

I just wanted to say that I am sorry for what you are going thru. And the advice given here is good advice. I would take it and run with it.

Also, although it doesn't seem like it now, I can tell you that things will get better! There was a time in my life when I was going through a bad divorce, plus I had spine surgery, so I lost my job because I could no longer work due to the spine injury. I was broke and living in an apartment. (I did not lose my family, my children and entire family stuck by me). But I can tell you things WILL get better. I met a wonderful man in the midst of all of this and am married again now for over 8 years.

Sending you prayers and hope that things will get better for you too. I would start with the advice given here. You can and will make it through this. I know you will! Best to you!

[RainCityWoman]

This too shall pass. It WILL get better. Stay strong. (Sorry about the cliches, but they ARE sincere.)

[hsawaknow]

Thank you all for your help and kind words. My ring I was going to sell would only fetch 1000.00 the sale of my house came in at 100,000.00 in which I had to split 50/50 with my spouse. My depression began to get worse when I wasn't able to see my youngest since May. I do take an anti depressant. I will check into volunteering for now. I had a major operation last year and still not a 100% but I can donate time. Your right about isolating. I need to get out. I was never like this. I just feel hopeless. I'm sure getting into a support group would help me with that. I appreciate you all.