Community Chat

[esmerelda]

@chiclets You didn’t say in your post. Did you mention to the principal what the guy had done to you to earn the punch?  If you did, what was his response to that?

[Sooner]

I'm so tired of hearing "men do" this and "men do" that.  For one thing, I am going to stand up for all the wonderful, good, decent men, husbands and fathers, who I know.  They DO NOT deserved to be under suspicion and looked upon as predators in any way shape or form. 

It is as wrong for us to generalize "men" as it is race, religion or nationality.  And most men are not what these guys are.

Also, as much lies on the women who go along with as the predators.  Sorry, but they have to share at least some of the blame and guilt.  

There are men and women out there looking to fool around for their own personal gratification or to get ahead on the job.  Period.  There are women out there who promote only women, or who prey on men or other women for affairs.  It happens.  Let's criticize the crime, not the general population of men and women who go to work, do their job and go home to their families.  We need to call out all the creeps and put the blame squarely on THEM! 

[Hippiified]

The crime is when it is UNWANTED!  You are talking about 2 different things.  They will have their day in court, hopefully.  But it is hard for some victims to come forward because of being blamed in some way.  This still happens.  Also there are many who are embarrassed to let others know.  Also, victims sometimes block traumatic assault from their memories.  Does not mean it didn’t happen. And doesn’t mean they shouldn’t come forward later. Please stop blaming the victim. 

Yes, there are many, many wonderful men out there.  But there are also creeps and psychos. 

[esmerelda]

@Sooner Good post. And I agree. 

I've been here a long time and have said more than once...based on posts...that many women here just don't like men. Maybe they've had bad experiences with them...divorced, rejected in some way, or maybe assaulted (in which case I hope they reported it right away).  But it's clear that some just have no use for them.  

My posts have been so in defense of men that I've been told that I am a man.  I'm not.  And have never wanted to be.  Done right, being a man is a hard job. 

[esmerelda]

@Hippiified How do they know it's unwanted unless they are told?  Some women don't want it, some don't mind it.  How is anyone to know who is who?  Even after it's done, the mn are clueless because even then they aren't told it is unwanted. Until years later. When accused, they know they did it but didn't know they offended...because nobody told them at the time...which is the reason for multiple instances from multiple accusers.

[chiclets]

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@esmerelda wrote:

@chiclets You didn’t say in your post. Did you mention to the principal what the guy had done to you to earn the punch?  If you did, what was his response to that?

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I did when I said you call my father and tell him what I did because of what that guy did.  I honestly believe it was because of the way I said it and stared at the principal that he did not call and let me go.

His response was that what the guy did was not deliberate, and it did not warrant what I did and causing such a disturbance during the anthem!!!  I admit I hit him and I also said a loud nasty verbal to the jerk. I was told that the guy did not mean to grab but only meant to tap me to get my attention because he wanted to ask me something. The principal had questioned the collegian student first before speaking with me. Even a tap would have been wrong. The guy was the football player for the school and yada, yada, and I was not the sorority type, and why would a fraternity guy pick on me. He did it because he thought he could do anything, and nothing happened to him.  I knew the difference between a tap and a grab.

[Hippiified]

@esmerelda

They do know it.  It’s not hard to tell. Facial gestures, pull back, the word “no”.

Come on! I know you know the difference.

[Hippiified]

@esmerelda

Nope.  There are more instances because they think they can do anything they please and get away with it.

[esmerelda]

@Hippiified wrote:

@esmerelda

Nope.  There are more instances because they think they can do anything they please and get away with it.

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@HippiifiedAnd why wouldn't they think that?  All of these accusers years and decades later have let them think that.

I haven't read in detail reports of many of the accusations; but I do remember reading one in particular having to do with Charlie Rose. 

The accuser wanted a job working with/for him.  She went to his place (invited) and "somehow" they ended up in bed.  She went home and called him the next day to see if she'd gotten the job.  (She hadn't...hence the accusation many years later.)  She either wanted the "attention" or didn't mind it because she was still interested in the job and would have taken it if it was offered, I'm sure.  So...do you think Charlie Rose thought he could do anything he pleased?  At least with her?  And how many other stories are similar, I wonder.

[esmerelda]

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@Hippiified wrote:

@esmerelda

They do know it.  It’s not hard to tell. Facial gestures, pull back, the word “no”.

Come on! I know you know the difference.

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@HippiifiedYes, I know the difference.  The men would have too, if they'd seen anything you mentioned or anything like it.