Community Chat

[seaBreeze]

@LilacTree  ... you're a poster I admire.   For this thread, I stopped after page 3 because of the brow-beating from a simple statement you made.  I "get" exactly what you meant.  

My favorite line from the movie Braveheart is:   "We're all going to die someday, it's just a matter of when."     So let's be kind to one another here, please. 

[on the bay]

It's ok not to be brave

[software]

IMO to be brave & fight is to not surrender when you face the enemy.

If I were faced with a similar diagnosis, I may choose not to be brave.

Except for the few negative posts, this has been a good discussion.

[suzyQ3]

Sometimes I hate the word "bravery." I feel the same way about  "chin up" and "keep a stiff upper lip."

If I want futilely to howl in the night, I will darn do so.

[happycat]

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@LilacTree wrote:

Alex Trebek just announced he has stage 4 pancreatic cancer.  He intends to keep on working and vows to “beat this thing.”  He is being lauded for being “brave.”

In my opinion he should, instead, spend these precious days with his family, who probably haven’t seen much of him in the last 40 years.  Be brave for them, not his TV audience.

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I haven't read all the replies. But this post makes me think of my husbands cousins wife. She was working full time, over time, and was dxd with breast cancer. It was crazy, as they had insurance, had money, went on vacations and it had been years since she had a mammogram. She kept working all those extra hours. Surely she didn't have to. I don't know. But whenever I saw her, she would say "I'm fighting this". Then, all of a sudden she was coughing. And then in the hospital. She never got to come home.

I have had a few conversations with various family members and some think that by her continuing to work, she felt she was fighting the cancer. I don't know. I just know it didn't end well. And quite frankly, I still can't believe she is gone. Its been 4 years this past Christmas. Unbelievable.

[GenXmuse]

I guess everyone’s definition of brave is different and maybe if he quit his job he’d feel like he was “giving in”. 

[Zhills]

Ironic that so many posters felt free to post their opinion of the OP's opinion........yet did not allow her the same freedom to express her own opinion of the situation.  That's all she did, just express HER opinion!

[GenXmuse]

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@Zhills wrote:

Ironic that so many posters felt free to post their opinion of the OP's opinion........yet did not allow her the same freedom to express her own opinion of the situation.  That's all she did, just express HER opinion!

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It’s like people are looking to be “rubbed the wrong way”. I think looking at the spirit of the post would go a long way towards understanding but people tend to skew negative, I guess. 

[Lindsays Grandma]

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@Ms tyrion2 wrote:

No one should be told how to live OR how to die.

My mantra is:   

Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside in a cloud of smoke, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming "Wow! What a Ride!”

~hunter s. Thompson~

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@Ms tyrion2   I love that saying, it is one of my favorites.  As a matter of fact I included it in one of my threads called Words, More Words, Words of Wisdom, and others.

[Lindsays Grandma]

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@LilacTree wrote:

I do agree he, and and anyone else, should do what he wants to do, and I should not judge him.  I apologize for singling him out, that was wrong.

on the whole, I guess I just don’t understand the concept that anyone facing such a diagnosis feels he/she has to be “brave” about it.  It’s bad enough knowing one’s days are numbered, but then to have to pretend on top of that doesn’t seem right to me either.

@LilacTree  Personally if I were ever diagnosed with that awful disease I doubt if I would stand and say 'I'll fight this."  I would not be brave, I would be scared beyond words.  I lost a beloved brother-in-law and three of my dearests and closest friends to it.  I understand where you are coming from.

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