Why must we always be “brave?” - Page 11

FrostyBabe1 · ‎05-09-2016

I would never, ever presume to suggest what someone who has just received a horrible diagnosis should do with their time or how they should feel. Everyone handles it differently based on their own circumstances.

I’m not offended either, but this is not the first time that the OP has posted something insensitive and then claim she meant otherwise when folks voice dissenting opinions.

~The more someone needs to brag about how wonderful, special, successful, wealthy or important they are, the greater the likelihood that it isn't true. ~

Isobel Archer · ‎04-04-2015

I don't think anyone "has" to be "brave," but I do think it was inspiring that he put a positive spin on his diagnosis.

I guess he could have said OMG I'm dying and I will immediately quit working and spend my few remaining days with my family, but he didn't.

I wish him well.

lovesrecess · ‎03-14-2010

I saw an interview a few months ago he did with a journalist...he said he was very close to his family. I am sure they will be a great source of support for him in the coming days. He seems like such a nice, decent man. Am praying he does beat the cancer...it has happened before.

LilacTree · ‎03-25-2012

@suzyQ3 wrote:
Sometimes I hate the word "bravery." I feel the same way about "chin up" and "keep a stiff upper lip."

If I want futilely to howl in the night, I will darn do so.

@suzyQ3

I love this post.

Formerly Ford1224
We must always take sides. Neutrality helps the oppressor, never the victim. Silence encourages the tormentor, never the tormented. Elie Wiesel 1986

IamMrsG · ‎08-29-2010

@suzyQ3 wrote:
Sometimes I hate the word "bravery." I feel the same way about "chin up" and "keep a stiff upper lip."

If I want futilely to howl in the night, I will darn do so.

I am frequently 'complimented' for being so strong. If they only knew.

Strive for respect instead of attention. It lasts longer.

chiclets · ‎07-01-2012

This is a matter of perceptiveness and interpretation, just that, nothing more and nothing less.

Permission nor validations aren't warranted.

Peace, health, and calm to all.

NYC Susan · ‎03-13-2010

@LilacTree wrote:
Alex Trebek just announced he has stage 4 pancreatic cancer. He intends to keep on working and vows to “beat this thing.” He is being lauded for being “brave.”

In my opinion he should, instead, spend these precious days with his family, who probably haven’t seen much of him in the last 40 years. Be brave for them, not his TV audience.

I understand what you're saying.

But I'm not sure why you assume his family hasn't seen much of him. He has a job, but it's not very time-consuming. And apparently he loves what he does because otherwise he would have moved on or retired years ago.

He works far fewer days and hours than most people, so I don't see why he can't spend the time he has remaining doing Jeopardy for as long as he wants. I assume he'll spend lots of time with family, but it can certainly be more than just that. And while he's feeling well enough, it may be better for him emotionally to keep some sense of normalcy. It's a personal decision, and not for everyone, but apparently what he's decided.

(I also don't think people are saying he's brave because he intends to keep working. I think it's because he's meeting this head-on: announcing his cancer to the world on his own terms and being determined to fight it. He's a public figure, so it's a bit different than it would be for the average person.)

NYC Susan · ‎03-13-2010

@LilacTree wrote:
I do agree he, and and anyone else, should do what he wants to do, and I should not judge him. I apologize for singling him out, that was wrong.

on the whole, I guess I just don’t understand the concept that anyone facing such a diagnosis feels he/she has to be “brave” about it. It’s bad enough knowing one’s days are numbered, but then to have to pretend on top of that doesn’t seem right to me either.

I guess some of us have different definitions of what it means to be brave. I don't see it as pretending.

I know that I never felt up to pretending when I was faced with medical problems, family tragedies, etc. I felt the way I felt, and I cried and gave into it all the time. Many people told me I was brave, but really all I did was get through it. And then I learned to deal with whatever remained, but only because I had no choice.

All any of us can do - when faced with anything - is the best we can do.

I'm glad to see you posting, btw. I hope you're feeling well. :-)

qualitygal · ‎10-04-2010

An interview done I presume before this diagnosis, AT said he worked 2 days a week. So maybe he is getting to spend time with his family. He's worked a long time.

ULY · ‎09-21-2013

Death is scary, period. Being brave, in my opinion, is shown by wanting to fight the good fight, wanting not to give up and wanting to make the most of his time.

I gess he could be "cowardly" but apparently that isn't in his nature. Good for him.