Community Chat

[catwhisperer]

---

@minkbunny wrote:

I lived in Message Board Dramaville for years - and was a willing participant.

However, I like to think that I have grown and changed and hope to not detour down that road again.

---

@minkbunny.....same here. I'm not perfect, but have cleaned up my act considerably here. I avoid certain posters and try not to get myself caught up in any negative drama anymore.

[MyGirlsMom]

@Moonchilde

I get what you were trying to convey but as a self admitted lugger, I'm the last one to advise anyone.  I've been here since 2008 and have many "friends" who I won't forget.  Fool me once and all that jazz.

[Moonchilde]

Oh, @Trinity11, ITA. My post, or anyone else's post, isn't going to change things in the long run. But it's something I see a lot, and I felt motivated to comment on it.

What I have noticed over time is that the topics that get the most flak on the forums are often those where nerves are hit. 

[Trinity11]

---

@SydneyH wrote:

---

@Trinity11 wrote:

---

---

Yes it is and inevitably useless......

Signed,

A former self-admitted control freak.

---

Too funny, I work with someone like that, I wish there was medication for that condition because it becomes quite taxing to deal with, lol.

---

For myself it was trying to control my parent's alcoholism. Thankfully, for an organization called Alanon, I learned all the tools to avoid it ...

[DiAnne]

Maybe the answer is that the people who are unhappy about the behavior on these boards move on to different sites where they feel the behavior is appropriate.  

[bri20]

You really have to ignore a lot of what goes on here.  

[jaxs mom]

---

@Moonchilde wrote:

---

@jaxs mom wrote:

---

@Lipstickdiva wrote:

These threads never go well. 

---

It would have gone better if it was worded differently. A thread saying, " I think I need to work on not carrying things over to new threads" or " Maybe we would get along better if we leave what happened in the past alone". 

It's well known that "you" statements never go over well. They always come off as a lecture. Of course they have their place occasionally, but not so much on the internet. Especially when the person using "you" statements has no authority over others, IE is not a mod or admin nor are they citing board rules. 

---

And a post saying this *to me* would likely have elicited a clarification commentary, as occurred between me and another poster.  

I would not have ever said "I think I need to work on not carrying things over to new threads" because I do not do that with the exception of alerting moderators to trolls.  Have I "ever" done it? Probably - but extremely infrequently if so, hence no need to "work on it."

Am I perfect? Heck no - and never claim to be. It's other posters who ascribe that to me. Some will get it, some won't, and some wilfully won't. That's okay.

---

The very fact that you started this thread proves otherwise. If you actually were able to not carry over things from other threads into new ones, it would never have occured to you to start this thread. 

[Trinity11]

---

@Moonchilde wrote:

Oh, @Trinity11, ITA. My post, or anyone else's post, isn't going to change things in the long run. But it's something I see a lot, and I felt motivated to comment on it.

What I have noticed over time is that the topics that get the most flak on the forums are often those where nerves are hit. 

---

I am not too sure....I think a lot of us come here with a full plate and by concentrating on something else it gets our minds off some real problems we have going on in life.

I try and give everyone the benefit of the doubt. Knowing how imperfect I am myself, I hesitate to call anyone else out. Goodness knows, we all have our bad days here.

[Moonchilde]

---

@Plaid Pants2 wrote:

No offense Moon, but who are you to dictate what everybody should and should not do?

Who made you board monitor, and who gave you the authority to set the rules around here?

You do realize that you can't control what everybody else does, only what you do, right?

Don't let what others do bother you so much.

Peace, out.

---

To which I can only say -

Anyone who thinks that any post (mine or anyone else's) is literally "ordering" "everyone" to behave in a certain prescribed way or believe a certain prescribed thing, sees in that post - what they want to see.

How many times have I seen posters accused of same respond with "well of COURSE it's only my opinion/POV, I took it as a given that people would understand that."

So...duh. It's my feelings about a frequent forum occurrence - nothing more or less. And I think people KNOW that, because they are adults. But for whatever various reasons, some choose to "make something of it" - either because they have a grudge against the poster or because it's in their very nature to "make something of" a lot of things in their life.

[Moonchilde]

Oh, yeah, @MyGirlsMom, that I get - we all have that - but not everyone goes around from thread to thread like the Roomba spreading the puppy doo for no reason. YOU don't do that. Not saying no one should have negative feelings/reactions, but it would be more logical if they were directed on-topic in a thread and not just cruisin' by, just cos'.