Community Chat

[Lipstickdiva]

@Laura14.  I see now.  I don't get those e-mails from FB asking if I know people, etc.   However, 2 or 3 times now I've gotten a message from FB indicating that I was now friends with someone and I never friended them or accepted a friend request from them.  One was some skeevy foreign dude.  When that happened, I deleted them as friends as soon as I found out.  And I wasn't happy about it happening.

I did think there was a way for you to make your page private so people can't search for you.  Not sure though.   

[AngusandBuddhasMom]

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@Laura14 wrote:

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@Lipstickdiva wrote:

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@Laura14 wrote:

With all due respect to Facebook being what you make it, not necessarily true unless one of you can tell me how to control this.  

Facebook gives you suggestions about who to be friends with and I assume also to others to friend you.  I had a HUGE problem with that since a lot of those suggested people were customers of my employer.  They don't need to be directed to my personal FB page.

My only friends were family and one coworker who did enjoy friending everyone including her clients.  I figured that was where it was coming from since she and I were friends so I created a completely separate FB account under a new identity to stay completely private.  

It's less but I still get "suggestions" for people I do know who don't need to know me and personal life.  I have ZERO friends on that account and it's not in any way linked to the other.  I ended up giving up and deactivating it all.  

I don't like a social media platform digging associated strangers up and directing them to connect with me especially when I and they have no reason to be in each other's personal spaces.         

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I guess I'm missing something here.  I can respect how you feel about this but no one can friend you without you accepting or confirming the friend request.  So it's not like people can just friend you without your knowledge or acceptance.

I get friend requests all the time from friends of friends, weird guys, etc.  I don't confirm them as friends.  Most of the time I actually delete their friend request. 

Do you not like the fact that you have to ignore them and they may be upset that you didn't accept their request?   

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@Lipstickdiva  They aren't asking to be my friend.  Only a few have and I have ignored the request.  This is in the suggestion part where FB encourages you to get to know certain people.  FB even emails you at times and ask if you know certain people.  

There is a whole list of them and their pictures every time I would log on and in my email and I didn't like who FB was bringing up in my face.  I'm sure I'm popping up in these people's faces too and that was a huge no no for me since a lot of those people didn't need to know I have a FB page, period.  If I want to browse and look people up, that should be my choice and not FB's proactive duty.

FB also won't let me completely private things like photos and profiles.  That's a deal breaker for me when they are directing strangers I do know only superficially to what I'm doing privately.  It's too easy for people to browse/stalk your page without asking to be your friend and I was way too uncomfortable with that so out the door FB went.  

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So just X them off I get them it is really not that big an issue. Unless you are friends with me, all you see on my home page is my wall photo and my pic. My photos, friends list are all blocked. And my friend list is blocked from my friends as well. You may want to check your security settings. 

[adamlambert]

thanks for the responses.  Interesting comments!!!

I didn't realize that if I liked a page or commented my friends would know.  I like pages with pretty men so I would have thought my extremely conservative ones would take me off.  Lol. Maybe they don't see my things like one poster said.  

I have one friend obsessed with aliens and ufo things.  I didn't mention that...funny to me. I'll unfollow her. 

I decided to create another account with only weight loss, health, travel and local events just to make it pleasant. I'll post pictures to the other one for my family of vacation scenery,  but otherwise not go on that account. 

That's  another thing, I have a few disabled friends and whenever I post vacation pix they say they wish they could go and keep commenting how jealous they are and that bums me out.  (It's just travel around the western US) One girl is often in the hospital.  

[Laura14]

@AngusandBuddhasMom  I did that but the damage was kind of done for me.  They had already shown these people I am online and potentially available to friend.  

It's my issue, not FB's, and I did have everything as private as I could make it but profile pics can't be privated as well as some other minor stuff and I just figured it wasn't worth it while I was working and FB was somehow pulling these people to my account.  

[JJsMom]

I regularly clean house. I unfriended a lot over nasty, racist comments and haven't looked back. I use FB primarily to connect with family, read news, and stay politically active (there are lots of local groups that have formed that keep me informed). I hide or unfriend oversharers or people I don't really care to stay in contact with any more, and I feel absolutely no guilt over it.

[Cranberries]

The New Year must bring it out in some people. I've seen several so far from (friends, family) who post things like "Well, time to clean up the friends list!" Or "I'm cleaning out my friends list, just post something in the comments if you want to stay." I guess I feel like if you really want to unfriend someone, you don't need to announce it on Facebook. Way too "Look at me! Look at me!" And it's not just people my age doing this, it's the older folks too!

[seaBreeze]

Facebook is a brag-fest.

That's all I read each morning as I check in to make sure "everyone's okay."

What you will never see or hear is how bad one looks "in the morning" .... the horrible fight a couple had to get to "that perfect beach resort" .... or hear about the child who just told their mom 'where to go' as they are posing for that perfect family portrait.   

I post nothing except newsworthy events--no one cares about my life or good fortune--only themselves--that's human nature.

[adamlambert]

Seabreeze, that's funny and true.  

i also cannot stand to read someone died on there.  

A friend from high school had a heart attack and the first thing she did was to post it to Facebook while she was in the hospital the day after. 

[Laura14]

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@Adamlambert wrote:

Seabreeze, that's funny and true.  

i also cannot stand to read someone died on there.  

A friend from high school had a heart attack and the first thing she did was to post it to Facebook while she was in the hospital the day after. 

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@adamlambert  LOL  I get what you meant but reading it the first time I was ready to ask how in the world your friend did that!  I didn't know FB was THAT connected.  Is there no place they can reach?   

PS:  Hope you friend did well and is okay.  

[Moonchilde]

I feel there is a correlation between how people react to posts they don't like on FB and posts/posters they don't like here on the QVC forums.

I get occasional posts (like 1-3 a week) from a couple of friends/family that I don't appreciate (political, religious, POV). Because I understand that for most who post on FB, expressing who they are is part of why they want to be there, I understand that not every post I see from everyone is going to be something I appreciate and agree with; I cut people slack as individuals expressing themselves. I just hide an individual post or three from my feed; it's easy. 

I understand that if 75% of what someone posts offends you in some way or squicks you, it's time to Unfollow or Unfriend. Too many kid or scenery photos? Too many memes? No big deal, I just scroll right on by as long as they don't upset or anger me - I can't for the life of me imagine pix of someone's kids *angering* or *disgusting* me to the point of storming off FB.

Boring doesn't anger me. Boring is just...boring, and easily skippable - just like the threads here where people just *have* to express how stupid or boring or trivial a poster is because they can. I'm thinking many of those are people who have "issues" that FB annoys them. Heh.