Community Chat

[Sooner]

---

@itiswhatitis wrote:

---

@Sooner wrote:

---

@itiswhatitis wrote:

---

@Sooner wrote:

Another consideration:  Aside from the law and what is legal, how would your new employer and fellow workers feel about it?  It might make for not-so-great a work atmosphere afterward if people were resentful of your taking the job and then them having to take up the slack.

---

This is irrelevant to her rights.  People would be mad at other co-workers for myriad reasons.  Having a baby is no different.

---

Right or wrong, legal or illegal, how people feel about you in the workplace is a factor.  Whether or not you have to take up the slack for them is a factor.  You have the "right" to do a lot of things, but that doesn't necessarity change the outcome or the consequences.  

---

I clearly disagree with this.  Whether co-workers would be a concern ~ would never ever be my concern.  I went on maternity leave twice.  Not once did I care what my co-workers thought about it.  Not once.  I guess I'd like to THINK that a woman having a baby would be her chief concern and not what her co-workers think.

---

I care what other people think of me.  That's who I am.  You don't have to not think about what others think about you to be a successful parent and raise a child who is considerate of others as well.

[ROMARY]

It Is What It Is:   I meant that I would stay with my present job, 'especially' if I had paid maternity leave.  (Right now, we don't know whether or not O/P's mom-to-be even has paid maternity leave, but if she does, it would be a bit of incentive, imo, to stay there, if she can manage to be there with a minimum of stress.)   Well, maybe O/P will update us re: this thread.  Wishing all well. 

[itiswhatitis]

---

@Sooner wrote:

---

@itiswhatitis wrote:

---

@Sooner wrote:

---

@itiswhatitis wrote:

---

@Sooner wrote:

Another consideration:  Aside from the law and what is legal, how would your new employer and fellow workers feel about it?  It might make for not-so-great a work atmosphere afterward if people were resentful of your taking the job and then them having to take up the slack.

---

This is irrelevant to her rights.  People would be mad at other co-workers for myriad reasons.  Having a baby is no different.

---

Right or wrong, legal or illegal, how people feel about you in the workplace is a factor.  Whether or not you have to take up the slack for them is a factor.  You have the "right" to do a lot of things, but that doesn't necessarity change the outcome or the consequences.  

---

I clearly disagree with this.  Whether co-workers would be a concern ~ would never ever be my concern.  I went on maternity leave twice.  Not once did I care what my co-workers thought about it.  Not once.  I guess I'd like to THINK that a woman having a baby would be her chief concern and not what her co-workers think.

---

I care what other people think of me.  That's who I am.  You don't have to not think about what others think about you to be a successful parent and raise a child who is considerate of others as well.

---

SMH

[itiswhatitis]

---

@ROMARY wrote:

It Is What It Is:   I meant that I would stay with my present job, 'especially' if I had paid maternity leave.  (Right now, we don't know whether or not O/P's mom-to-be even has paid maternity leave, but if she does, it would be a bit of incentive, imo, to stay there, if she can manage to be there with a minimum of stress.)   Well, maybe O/P will update us re: this thread.  Wishing all well. 

---

Thanks @ROMARY for clarification.  I appreciate it.

[pggoody]

Thanks for all the good information.  I will have to ask about the current company's maternity leave.  I seem to recall her saying that she heard their maternity leave was not the best.  I'm not sure what that meant.   Will post when I hear back. 

[VaBelle35]

Many women in my company choose not to announce a pregnancy until they are safely in their second trimester.  My co-worker from another office came by last week to tell us all in person she was pregnant and in her 4th month.  She waited so that if she miscarried she would not have to explain it to 1000 people.

I have been pleasantly surprised many, many times in my 18 years with my company at the number of very pregnant women we hire (and hired by male hiring managers, not female).  We are not a production company of any type, so that plays a part in it.

And it very much is a hardship to cover for people out on any type of long or short term leave.  Right now, my department is down 6 people and 1 is working partial hours while recovering and I am just now back to 100% after spending a few months doing physical therapy.  It takes a toll on the rest of the team and many companies are running very very thin to keep costs down and profits up.

[Mominohio]

---

@itiswhatitis wrote:

---

@Sooner wrote:

Another consideration:  Aside from the law and what is legal, how would your new employer and fellow workers feel about it?  It might make for not-so-great a work atmosphere afterward if people were resentful of your taking the job and then them having to take up the slack.

---

This is irrelevant to her rights.  People would be mad at other co-workers for myriad reasons.  Having a baby is no different.

---

It might be irrelevant to her rights but very relevant to the kind of working conditions she might be placing herself in.

There are so many ways that both employers and employees can make your work life either enjoyable or miserable.

[Goldengate8361]

It is very important that she tell the prospective employer that she is pregnant. To be hired and then surprise them by informing them that you're pregnant is a terrible way to start your job and shows incredible unprofessionalism. I say that as a female executive. You may talk all day about your rights, but I know for a fact that that would be a remarkably stupid career move. I'm a little surprised that this is even a question.

[CrazyDaisy]

---

@itiswhatitis wrote:

---

@Sooner wrote:

---

@itiswhatitis wrote:

---

@Sooner wrote:

Another consideration:  Aside from the law and what is legal, how would your new employer and fellow workers feel about it?  It might make for not-so-great a work atmosphere afterward if people were resentful of your taking the job and then them having to take up the slack.

---

This is irrelevant to her rights.  People would be mad at other co-workers for myriad reasons.  Having a baby is no different.

---

Right or wrong, legal or illegal, how people feel about you in the workplace is a factor.  Whether or not you have to take up the slack for them is a factor.  You have the "right" to do a lot of things, but that doesn't necessarity change the outcome or the consequences.  

---

I clearly disagree with this.  Whether co-workers would be a concern ~ would never ever be my concern.  I went on maternity leave twice.  Not once did I care what my co-workers thought about it.  Not once.  I guess I'd like to THINK that a woman having a baby would be her chief concern and not what her co-workers think.

---

Teamwork is a big factor in many offices, you need to be able to count on your co-workers.  Just because you choose to ignore how you are percieved by your co-workers does not eliminate their feelings.

[Isobel Archer]

She doesn't have to tell them she is pregnanat - even if she knows - when she is interviewed.  And they are not allowed to either ask her - or use that as a reason not to hire her (unless she is applying for a  a job where she would be exposing her baby to harm.)

 She would be eligible for FMLA just as any other person would who needed it once she is hired.  She would be eligible for additional sick leave benefits based on longevity on the same basis as other employees

So legally her pregnancy cannot be used against her.

However, as noted, employers and coworkers are not automotons and have been known to react emotionally when they think they have been manipulated.  As a former HR exec, I am well aware of the fact that the biggest reason people are fired is that the boss does not like them (often for legitimate reasons) and/or that coworkers dislike the person so much it makes the boss's life unbearable.  Now of course that is never the reason given - and it is very easy to find another reason - and very difficult - and tme consuming - to prove that the actual reason is illegal.

If she is hired and then very quickly needs all sorts of accommodation for a condition that no matter what she says, people believe she knew about - and this occurs before she has had a chance to prove herself as a valuable member of the team - then yes there could be a bad outcome. 

Unfortunately not everyone is excited and pleased about having to work extra hours to compensate for a new arrival who now needs extended leave - particularly if they have already been doing that for some  time due to the vacancy and now expect relief. Of course, this could be the case with someone who suddenly had an accident or got sick, but again, even then if the person just arrived, the reaction might not actually be any better - human nature being what it is.

Yes employees have "rights," but when they impinge on and extract a cost from others, a sense that the situation is unduly "unfair" to those others can have an impact as well.