Community Chat

[Peaches McPhee]

What I don't like are the road-side memorials that are months old, and look like CR*P.    Did they forget it was there?  Don't they ever drive by and see what a mess it is?  

[Anonymous032819]

All that matters, and all that is important, is that it brings the one who is grieving peace and comfort.

That's all.

Nothing else matters.

What you and I may think about it is irrelevant.

[shoesnbags]

I forgot to say that I find the roadside memorials depressing.  In my immediate area I have to pass two separate memorials where a mother and child died, each of them a single car accident due to driver error.  

One was on an icy morning (unusual around here) where everyone was told to stay off the roads.  The young mom was taking her baby to the sitter on her way to work and slid off the road into a canal.  Every day I have to pass the memorial with it's sad, weather beaten teddy bears, etc.  

The other happened on a major street near the entrance to a shopping center.  Similar situation, but no bad weather involved.  Both of these have been up for years.  There is so much sadness in life as it is, I don't need reminders of more sadness on public property.  Just my own feelings here.

[SunValley]

I’ve seen a few of these on rear windows. It makes me wonder if the car owner is having a hard time processing their grief or perhaps it’s a cultural custom with which I’m unfamiliar. 

[SunValley]

About the roadside memorials...some I’ve seen are quite elaborate with crosses, numerous plastic floral tributes, whirly things, and toys. A few years ago Items from one memorial blew into the roadway and caused a wreck so our city passed an ordinance limiting what could be placed and I believe for how long too. 

[shoptilyadropagain]

I see them a lot and even for pets too.  Personally, I think it's tacky and I would never want one on my vehicle but, if that's what somebody else wants to do, I see no problem with it.  I do not like to see roadside crosses, etc. where an accident occurred and a life (lives) was lost.  I don't think they belong there and they are normally on the side of the road in the grassy area that the county or state take care of and mow, etc.  

[Greeneyedlady21]

People need to be allowed to grieve and memorialize loved ones in any way they choose. 

There is so much judgment about grief in this country, and in these forums. So much judgment about a topic that people avoid discussing in helpful ways.

[occasionalrain]

I don't think people should be prevented from placing car window memorials if they wish. I believe they mean to honor the deceased but I don't believe most others see it as an honor. Since a car is disposable, the memorials are disposable as well.

[FancyPhillyshopper]

Noone should ever judge how others want to memorialize their dearly departed.

Some people put up big angel statues in cemeteries, some people put up billboards, some people buy full-page obituaries, some people have fancy memorial services, some people put names on their car windows, some people put photos on their t-shirts, some people get tattoos, some people ask for donations to charities, some people have a party.

Just because their taste is different, does NOT make it poor taste.

Death is always sad.  Whatever we can do to help mitigate the pain and celebrate the person is always the right choice.

[reiki604]

How each person handles their grief is as individual as they are. It is not up to me to judge or tell anyone how they should handle it. Sometimes MYOB is more compassionate and caring than anything else. They were very common around here after 9/11.