Community Chat

[mom2four0418]

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@reiki604 wrote:

How each person handles their grief is as individual as they are. It is not up to me to judge or tell anyone how they should handle it. Sometimes MYOB is more compassionate and caring than anything else. They were very common around here after 9/11.

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I find it so sad that this even needs to be said. Thank you for the kind and thoughtful post. 

[Anonymous032819]

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@FancyPhillyshopper wrote:

Noone should ever judge how others want to memorialize their dearly departed.

Some people put up big angel statues in cemeteries, some people put up billboards, some people buy full-page obituaries, some people have fancy memorial services, some people put names on their car windows, some people put photos on their t-shirts, some people get tattoos, some people ask for donations to charities, some people have a party.

Just because their taste is different, does NOT make it poor taste.

Death is always sad.  Whatever we can do to help mitigate the pain and celebrate the person is always the right choice.

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@FancyPhillyshopper 

Exactly!

To your point, I got a tattoo to memorialize my parents.

I apologize for the poor quality of the picture, but the tatt is on my upper left arm, and trying to get the correct angle that shows the tatt, but not my face, was challenging.

[mspatmac]

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@FancyPhillyshopper wrote:

Noone should ever judge how others want to memorialize their dearly departed.

Some people put up big angel statues in cemeteries, some people put up billboards, some people buy full-page obituaries, some people have fancy memorial services, some people put names on their car windows, some people put photos on their t-shirts, some people get tattoos, some people ask for donations to charities, some people have a party.

Just because their taste is different, does NOT make it poor taste.

Death is always sad.  Whatever we can do to help mitigate the pain and celebrate the person is always the right choice.

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@FancyPhillyshopper  Thank you. Can you imagine how someone who chooses to do this would feel if they happened on this thread being told they are tacky and in poor taste? Judging how a person handles their grief is just not right. 

[mom2four0418]

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@Anonymous032819 wrote:

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@FancyPhillyshopper wrote:

Noone should ever judge how others want to memorialize their dearly departed.

Some people put up big angel statues in cemeteries, some people put up billboards, some people buy full-page obituaries, some people have fancy memorial services, some people put names on their car windows, some people put photos on their t-shirts, some people get tattoos, some people ask for donations to charities, some people have a party.

Just because their taste is different, does NOT make it poor taste.

Death is always sad.  Whatever we can do to help mitigate the pain and celebrate the person is always the right choice.

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@FancyPhillyshopper 

Exactly!

To your point, I got a tattoo to memorialize my parents.

I apologize for the poor quality of the picture, but the tatt is on my upper left arm, and trying to get the correct angle that shows the tatt, but not my face, was challenging.

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That is so pretty!

[GenXmuse]

I would never begrudge anyone the way they want to memorialize their loved ones nor would I have the poor taste to start a topic on it. It's quite common in our area among our Latino community. 

[LillyandHobo]

In the 70's they usef to do that and get their names etched in the wondows. I haven't seem them lately

[Sooner]

Well, here's another take on it.  We each have our own losses.  I think to remind everone we come in contact with is too much, because we all suffer our own losses, in our own times and our own ways. 

My point here is that I would hope not to sadden everyone around me every day.  And I wouldn't want to be reminded of my losses every time I went to a birthday party or the post office, nor would I want to say to the world all day I have lost loved ones.  I hope you understand what I'm saying here.  It is difficult for me to express.

I don't think that is healthy when you are reminded every time you get in your car and express that to the world.   

[LillyandHobo]

Well said. We all handle grief and the way we remember or pay tribute to them. I might not do certain things but who I am to say. I remember many, many years ago in Victorian times? they had mounring jewelry. Some were actually made out of the deceased hair. It was common to wear pins, pendants and all sorts of items. I think it is just an expression of love! 

[Queen of shop]

Grief is such a personal journey. I don't think that we have to understand what way people choose to handle it. I do however believe that we should respect it. For myself, I am still heartbroken having lost my mom two years ago. It would do me no good to have a memorial on my car window for her. I don't need a reminder of how sad I still am. Just my opinion.

As @reiki604 mentioned, there was a lot after 911 in my area on cars. It was very sad. All I could do when I saw one was to say a prayer for the deceased as well as the deceased family to have the strenght to carry on.

[GenXmuse]

Far be it from me to actually feel inconvenienced by someone's grief because they dare to make it public.