Community Chat

[Lindsays Grandma]

1.  Every time I go shopping I go straight to the baby section.

                              Sale on Aisle Adorable

2.   Spit-up is my new favorite accessory; no outfit is

complete without it.

                            Barf is the new black

3.   They say to test out baby names, say them over and over.

Bull.  What they really should suggest is to be called Mom over and over and over again, and see if you sill choose that.

               Mom? Mom, mom, MOM, mommy

Remember the "mine" seagulls on Finding Nemo?  Replace the "mine" with "mom" and you'll get a pretty good feel what the rest of your life will be like. 

4.   I feel personally victimized by my own daughter.  I just

want her to stop throwing crackers at me.

                   Toddlers can be terrorists

5.   Start making myself breakfast, and ended up making everybody except myself breakfast.

                     The classic mom diet

6.   My expectations + reality = comedy.  Or crying myself

to sleep.  Reality is getting puke in your bra because your

kid needs to be hugged while they 're sick.

7.   It's official:  I'm in love...with my Roomba.  They say being a mom increases your capacity for love.

9.   I hate when I'm waiting for mom to cook dinner and then I remember that I am mom and I have to cook dinner.

                      Sorry, done adulting for the day.

10.   Whoever wrote the song "I'm Easy Like Sunday Morning" did not have kids.  Sunday breakfast means toast and eggs...on the floor again.

11.   When my kids act up in public, I like yell "Wait till I tell your mom."  and pretend they are not mine.  Your mom would do something by golly!

12.   The number one thing parents hear most often, is

"You're going to miss this someday" I tell myself as I step on legos all the way to the bathroom.