Re: Jim Carrey's GF Commits Suicide

winamac1 · ‎12-29-2010

@Irshgrl31201 wrote:
This is so sad. What a beautiful girl who sounds like she had a really beautiful heart.

I hate hearing that expression "it was so selfish" when someone commits suicide. No one knows the pain a person goes through before they decide to do something like this. It is often done after living through years of mental pain and going from dr to dr to get help in the form of therapy and different combinations of drugs to help them get to a point where they could deal with the pain. Thankfully, I have had many friends saved through that and have gone on to live happier lives but I have had 2 close friends who after fighting more than 20 yrs of chronic painfully debilitating depression, could go on no longer. THey fought as long as they could and weren't selfish at all. The only people who are selfish are the ones demanding someone should stay here regardless of how unhappy they are after trying for years and years, to be happy.

Jim Carrey himself is bipolar and has gone through long periods of depression.

ITA

I had a relative who went through exactly this. It's far different from being "selfish" as some so readily post.

"friends don't let friends drink white zinfandel"

stazgirl · ‎06-11-2014

@catwhisperer wrote:
@chickenbutt wrote:
@catwhisperer wrote:
@chickenbutt...I have been avoiding reading this thread because it hits too close to home. My son took his own life ten years ago. He was a drug addict. You are a very wise lady and thank you for your posts on this subject. You are never judgemental and try to be understanding of what others are dealing with. No one knows or can assume what goes on in a persons head when they decide to end their life. My thoughts and prayers go out to this young lady's family and friends.

I am so terribly sorry for your unspeakable loss! I really cannot imagine. You have been so kind to me and I enjoy our exchanges. That you have gone through such a profound loss just breaks my heart. I imagine yours is still broken to this day.

@chickenbutt...thank you. It's something you live with for the rest of your life. The important thing is how you deal with it IMO. I don't dwell on it on a daily basis and get all depressed about it. I know people who have had losses decades ago and just can't get past the loss and to this day are sad and depressed. It's not my place to comment on how they feel. For ME, life goes on and even though my thoughts and memories are always there in my mind, I am not going to let the sadness rule my daily life.

I, too, enjoy our exchanges here on the boards.

I SOOO understand your pain, my son left me 8 yrs ago, we had no idea, no drugs, no alcohol, good job, etc, he was 21 yrs old and obviously something was not right, he was always my "OK" child, the one I never worried about. Now I relize he was also my "keep everything in" child, not wanting to worry ME. I had enough to worry about I guess he thought, his sister is bi-polar and his father was bi-polar, and abusive (we divorced when my son was 4) My heart cries for anyone who has lost a child or loved one this way and I really feel for the ones who have nothing but insults and rude remarks to say to someone who has lost a loved one to suicide, It IS NOT a selfish act, Most suicides are the end result of many many painful yrs, that most of us can not even imagine. THE SELFISH ones are the ones who make inconsiderate remarks and judgements to those of us who have lost, What drives someone to be cruel and thoughtless to someone who just lost someone? Are all of you and yours so perfect that you think nothing will touch your life? Since my son's death, I have met more than my share of people who have been affected by someone close to them comminting suicide, in EVERY walk of life and financial level. It opened my eyes to the fact that we are NOT a minority, people are just not willing to talk about it because the act is judged so harshly.

stazgirl · ‎06-11-2014

Jim is and has struggled with bi-poloar disorder, alot of people do. It is a mental illness that is not always controled by meds. Yes, the meds take away some of the "craziness" but they come no where near to letting you feel "OK" and "good". My daughter is bi-polar and has tried so many meds over the yrs, some help, some do not and ALL make her feel kind of hazy. NO ONE should EVER be put down foe a mental illness. It is NOT like they choose it.

catwhisperer · ‎07-11-2010

@stazgirl....VERY well said!!! I am so sorry for the loss of your son.

I promise to remind myself every day that I am strong, courageous, and resilient.

missy1 · ‎03-10-2010

Interesting article. She had been involved with Scientology,

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3256527/Jim-Carrey-s-ex-Cathriona-White-kept-involvement-Sci...

chickenbutt · ‎03-09-2010

Hi Stazgirl! I'm so sorry for the loss of your son and the manu tribulations you have suffered with everything! I imagine, like Cat said, it's something that just never leaves you, even though you have to move past it.

You know, I was thinking about all of this last night (man, sometimes I wish I could turn it off - since I was a very small child...always thinking), anyway, and something occurred to me about the ones who put others down by calling them selfish for ending their pain.

I kind of wonder if maybe it's just that some people just don't know what to think, to justify it, because they totally don't understand. Maybe they think that saying others are selfish for ending their pain is their way of making it sensical to them and maybe they think that it helps the survivors to feel better. Clearly it doesn't, but they don't know that. I have a feeling that not everybody who has such harsh judgment really means it the way it is. They might think they are contributing to ending somebody's pain.

I don't know. That just occurred to me and, while I don't believe that every body means well, I think SOME people really do. It's ignorance and not ill-will for some.

Anita Bourbon · ‎06-15-2015

@stazgirl wrote:
Jim is and has struggled with bi-poloar disorder, alot of people do. It is a mental illness that is not always controled by meds. Yes, the meds take away some of the "craziness" but they come no where near to letting you feel "OK" and "good". My daughter is bi-polar and has tried so many meds over the yrs, some help, some do not and ALL make her feel kind of hazy. NO ONE should EVER be put down foe a mental illness. It is NOT like they choose it.

Please make sure that your daughter is being checked for legitimate imbalances such as thyroid, progesterone, vitamin b12, etc. There are many real health conditions that are regularly misdiagnosed as bipolar depression, and as a result many people suffer the ill-effects of psych drugs without treating the real underlying physical problem. A good naturopathic doctor should be able to help.

stazgirl · ‎06-11-2014

@chickenbutt wrote:
Hi Stazgirl! I'm so sorry for the loss of your son and the manu tribulations you have suffered with everything! I imagine, like Cat said, it's something that just never leaves you, even though you have to move past it.

You know, I was thinking about all of this last night (man, sometimes I wish I could turn it off - since I was a very small child...always thinking), anyway, and something occurred to me about the ones who put others down by calling them selfish for ending their pain.

I kind of wonder if maybe it's just that some people just don't know what to think, to justify it, because they totally don't understand. Maybe they think that saying others are selfish for ending their pain is their way of making it sensical to them and maybe they think that it helps the survivors to feel better. Clearly it doesn't, but they don't know that. I have a feeling that not everybody who has such harsh judgment really means it the way it is. They might think they are contributing to ending somebody's pain.

I don't know. That just occurred to me and, while I don't believe that every body means well, I think SOME people really do. It's ignorance and not ill-will for some.

YES< I do know that most people are at a loss for words at a time like that, I understand that. BUT< there IS a huge misconception that most who commit suicide MUST have been caught up in some dirty dealings, or drugs, alcohol, the like, and still put a bad connotation on it. FIRST and formost, ANYONE using or harming themself in any way, drugs, alcohol, etc has A PROBLEM, no more or no less than most anyone else, they turn to something to make them feel better, MOST people do that, whether it be food, shopping,stealing, yelling at others, and in my son's case, keeping everyting in. We ALL have are demons and ways of coping. For some, we get tired of "coping" and find a solution to the problem. When my grandson at 5 asked what happened to "uncle Matt?" We told him him he died because his brian was sick.. I believe in that moment of despair, you do suffer a severe mental episode in which your thinking is impaired enough to cause you (in defense) to NOT think of the outside concequenses of your actions and just focus on stopping the pain.

When I returned to work after my son's death, I was about to open the door to the lounge and I heard a co-worker say "how good a kid could he have been? He killed himself!" I almost quit, I work at a hospital, full of medical professionals, for goodness sake! REALLY? these are health care workers? My son was a good man, with a bright future ahead, he was not perfect, he did all the usual "teen age" boy coming of age things, but he grew up, got a job, worked to lived. BUT something was not right, We have to remove the stigma about mental health, Because of the stigma, Young adults do not feel free to seek help for any mental problems they might feel they have, they feel there is something wrong with them and they are embarrased to seek help, they do not want anyone finding out as it can affect their jobs, schooling, relationships, NO ONE is immune and it is a disease, it is not something someone can control on their own, and ALL MEDS DO NOT WORK>>THEIR IS NO "MAGIC HAPPY PILL" AND putting down and condeming someone is no way to help

stazgirl · ‎06-11-2014

@Anita Bourbon wrote:
@stazgirl wrote:
Jim is and has struggled with bi-poloar disorder, alot of people do. It is a mental illness that is not always controled by meds. Yes, the meds take away some of the "craziness" but they come no where near to letting you feel "OK" and "good". My daughter is bi-polar and has tried so many meds over the yrs, some help, some do not and ALL make her feel kind of hazy. NO ONE should EVER be put down foe a mental illness. It is NOT like they choose it.

Please make sure that your daughter is being checked for legitimate imbalances such as thyroid, progesterone, vitamin b12, etc. There are many real health conditions that are regularly misdiagnosed as bipolar depression, and as a result many people suffer the ill-effects of psych drugs without treating the real underlying physical problem. A good naturopathic doctor should be able to help.

THANK YOU, She has been, she is 35 now and we have been dealing with this since she was 16, but it exploding with the trauma of her brothers death, like starting all over agian. she gets checked reg and trust me, being in health care myself, we have exhausted ever outlet trying to find help . I think she has finally found a combo that works ok. NOTHING makes you feel whole again, and they all have horrible side effects, but hopefully we have finally found a combo that works better. she also deals with her autistic 13yr old son so she does have her plate full, .AND her stepdad, myself and her husband are very sure to tell her often how much she is loved and how proud we are of her, so there is NO DOUBT in her mind that she has people to turn to.

CatsyCline · ‎07-24-2013

just curious, @stazgirldo you have a source that cites Jim Carrey's bi-polar disorder?

everything online indicates he has suffered from depression only. He did say he was on Prozac but that medication alone, with no mood stabilizer, is usually not indicated for bi-polar disorder.

i'm very sorry for your loss of your son, and your daughter's struggle, i had not read the rest of your posts when i replied.

bi-polar is difficult to treat. there are newer medications on the market, but i'm not convinced that the atypical antipsychotics are the right way to go. there is a keystone med that many people won't even try. it can be a lifesaver. compliance is never easy.

best wishes to you and your daughter.