Community Chat

[Leeny]

I looked through all the forums and didn't see anything related to this topic. I hope you don't think I am being horrible. So here it goes. 

My mother is in a nursing home and she has a cousin that has interfered since day 1. I am the only child and I am my mother's power of attorney. A couple of years ago this cousin purchased a cell phone for my mother who has dementia and I expressed to her then I didn't go along with it at all. 

Now my mother is calling my daughter at all hours of the wee morning and then hangs up. She use to do this to me, but that stopped awhile back. My DD told me today she is not going to put up with this anymore and that I need to contact the cousin and have the phone removed. My mother hasn't a clue how to work this phone and yet her cousin says she needs it to keep her social.??? Any suggestions? 

[MickD]

@Leeny you are the POA case closed.  Give cousin her phone back.

[Sooner]

Take the phone out and let the nursing home staff know YOU are the POA and they aren't to take direction from anyone else and you DO NOT want your mother to have a phone.  

You have to stand up for yourself.  Been there, done that. You have to. 

[DiAnne]

If you are the DPOA just take the phone away from your mother.  I might also make the social worker aware of the problem.  

[Annabellethecat66]

Here's my reply.  Why does you mother need a cell phone?  Answer, she doesn't.  Especially if she has Dementia.

I'm surprised the nursing home allows her to have a cell phone!  

Answer (my opinion) is to remove the cell phone...period.

[pegomyheart]

Take the phone away. Don't feel bad about it. Case closed. 

[nana59]

Take the phone away from your mother--then use it to call that whacky cousin all hours of the day and night....sounds fair to me....

[Leeny]

@Annabellethecat66

@pegomyheart@DiAnne

@Sooner

@MickD

Thank You all for the vote of confidence that I needed to hear. I e-mailed my cousin and I will give her the opportunity to get rid of it and if she doesn't I am taking it away when I go out this week. I didn't want to call the cousin since I don't want confrontation at the nursing home. I will take it and give it to the social worker or the Nurse in Charge and they can give it to the cousin when she comes. 

@Annabellethecat66.. Exactly, why does a 85 yr. old woman with Dementia need a phone? It's ridiculous. Who needs to have the phone ringing at 4AM in the morning? My DD is an RN and works late and needs her sleep. It's crazy....

[AuntG]

I'd contact the cousin and say that as POA I've removed the phone because mother is confused and making nuisance calls.  

[Sooner]

---

@Leeny wrote:

@Annabellethecat66

@pegomyheart@DiAnne

@Sooner

@MickD

Thank You all for the vote of confidence that I needed to hear. I e-mailed my cousin and I will give her the opportunity to get rid of it and if she doesn't I am taking it away when I go out this week. I didn't want to call the cousin since I don't want confrontation at the nursing home. I will take it and give it to the social worker or the Nurse in Charge and they can give it to the cousin when she comes. 

@Annabellethecat66.. Exactly, why does a 85 yr. old woman with Dementia need a phone? It's ridiculous. Who needs to have the phone ringing at 4AM in the morning? My DD is an RN and works late and needs her sleep. It's crazy....

---

Sometimes people can GET calls, but they don't make them, or certainly not at inappropriate times.  It all depends on the patient. . .