Re: Help! Florida family needs help....

herekitty_kitty · ‎10-19-2011

There are tens of thousands of people who need real help. someone who doesn't want to get off their duff and get a job and work is not one of them. The whole woe is me pity party is old.

NoelSeven · ‎03-09-2010

Just a suggestion, but if the son is a good kid, you might consider being his favorite aunt, or something close to that. Steering him in the right direction and maybe taking him shopping for each new school semester. His dad probably doesn't think much about getting his son school clothes or school supplies.

I hate to think of a kid going without because his dad is a lazy guy.

A Thrill Of Hope The Weary World Rejoices

ROMARY · ‎04-28-2010

All in all, after reading several (not all) posts, I do believe that my final thought is that if I were the O/P, I'd suggest to the ex that she should seriously think about moving to another state. That might 'awaken' her to the idea of just maybe she and her DS should look into various other paths: Work and/or some type of private assistance for the 10 yr. old in her own state.

'More or less', 'Right or wrong', 'In general', and 'Just thinking out loud ' (as usual).

stazgirl · ‎06-11-2014

On 9/26/2014 ROMARY said:
All in all, after reading several (not all) posts, I do believe that my final thought is that if I were the O/P, I'd suggest to the ex that she should seriously think about moving to another state. That might 'awaken' her to the idea of just maybe she and her DS should look into various other paths: Work and/or some type of private assistance for the 10 yr. old in her own state.

SHe has suggested they move. they are not receptive to the idea. They also have no interest in getting work of any kind. Sounds to me they just want to be taken care of. OP and hubby need to stand tall and proud and resist the urge to help too much. (but there is the grandson to consider) BUT, to that, if other grandma and his dad do not care how they are treating/teaching him now, I am not sure anything you send meant for him will be used for that purpose either.

stazgirl · ‎06-11-2014

On 9/26/2014 NoelSeven said:
Just a suggestion, but if the son is a good kid, you might consider being his favorite aunt, or something close to that. Steering him in the right direction and maybe taking him shopping for each new school semester. His dad probably doesn't think much about getting his son school clothes or school supplies.

I hate to think of a kid going without because his dad is a lazy guy.

OP is his GRANDMA and lives on the other side of the country. maybe OP you could bring him out for the summer with the condition that he go back if/when his DAD gets his act together.

ROMARY · ‎04-28-2010

sssgirl: They seem to have an unproductive answer to everything OP and the rest of their family has suggested. I would 'forget it', suggest a move one more time, and then wish them lots of luck. Who knows what they are doing. One of the other sons/or whomever (I believe) who lives nearby should really step up, see what's going on, refer them to wherever/whatever. Maybe occasionally take the youngster out on the weekends. See that he has everything he needs such as school supplies, and a few items of clothing, shoes, etc. And, yes! Perhaps the grandson can spend a summer with Grandma and Grandpa! See another side of (a better) life.

'More or less', 'Right or wrong', 'In general', and 'Just thinking out loud ' (as usual).

stazgirl · ‎06-11-2014

On 9/26/2014 ROMARY said:
sssgirl: They seem to have an unproductive answer to everything OP and the rest of their family has suggested. I would 'forget it', suggest a move one more time, and then wish them lots of luck. Who knows what they are doing. One of the other sons/or whomever (I believe) who lives nearby should really step up, see what's going on, refer them to wherever/whatever. Maybe occasionally take the youngster out on the weekends. See that he has everything he needs such as school supplies, and a few items of clothing, shoes, etc. And, yes! Perhaps the grandson can spend a summer with Grandma and Grandpa! See another side of (a better) life.

Agreed, but sounds like one of the other brothers has already "tried" to help with giving him a job over and over. SOunds to me like everyone (brothers) have tried. AND probably have families of their own to support, They are NOT obligated to spend their hard earned money on freeloaders, AND it sounds to me like they just want handouts AND may be holding the grandson over the OP head to get that handout...SAD situation.

ROMARY · ‎04-28-2010

ssssgirl: Yes, now that I'm thinking about it............Also, withholding and/or using children/grandchildren (for whatever reason(s), petty or not petty), is a 'hot spot' with me. I have ended up 'going overboard' with my comments, so I'll be quiet in this thread.

'More or less', 'Right or wrong', 'In general', and 'Just thinking out loud ' (as usual).

stazgirl · ‎06-11-2014

On 9/26/2014 ROMARY said:
ssssgirl: Yes, now that I'm thinking about it............Also, withholding and/or using children/grandchildren (for whatever reason(s), petty or not petty), is a 'hot spot' with me. I have ended up 'going overboard' with my comments, so I'll be quiet in this thread.

ME too, we are just mainly talking to each other, ${#emotions_dlg.lol}$ but I like you, HATE situations that put a child in the middle to be used as a pawn. AND I HATE LAZY PARENTS, who do not do everything possible to see that their child has at least the minimum that he needs. And figure everyone else will do it for them.

Sunnyfield · ‎04-20-2010

Yes, I fear that we are talking to each other and all agree with what the real problem is (laziness and lack of motivation, along with enabling)...but I do appreciate everyone's suggestions...and thanks for making me feel like I really am right, and not just being a beeyotch when I don't hand over $$$$.....