Community Chat

[Mom2Dogs]

Sheesh....she should have kept her mouth shut.  Very rude -I don't care how old she is..little kids get a pass until they are taught to be thank for any gift.... but she is old enough to know better.

[CalminHeart]

IMO, it doesn't matter if she has room in her freezer or not.

It doesn't matter if she doesn't eat meat. 

It doesn't matter if she doesn't like every piece of what she received.

It just doesn't matter.

What matters is her response. There are ways to respond to gifts and ways to not respond to gifts. This was not the correct way.

[chrystaltree]

@Trailrun23 wrote:

I dealt with such a MIL many years ago...you could predict the negative response before you even bought the gift. Finally just gave her photos of the grandkids and her son. But not in frames; she didn't like the ones I bought. Some people simply don't want to be pleased and admit you did something good in what you picked out for them.

Omg!  Mil was like that.  She cocked her nose up and complained about every gift we gave her.  Hubby and I had a game in which we predicted the what she woukd say to bash our gift.  We kept giving her nice gifts because it was about ME, it really was not about the gifts.

[JoyFilled Warrior]

.

Where's "Miss Manners" when ya need her??

[JoyFilled Warrior]

 .

< < <    Edited - - Removed - Bad Idea  > > >

[Sooner]

---

@JoyFilled Warrior wrote:

 .

(note to MIL)

.

"Dear MIL,

You won't be able to make me feel badly, for lovingly giving you such a generous, thoughtful, delicious gift. 

Merry Christmas,'MOM.'

.

/s/  From your adoring DIL, & your son, my husband."

---

@JoyFilled Warrior I would love it if you gave me a pony!!!!  I would be SOOOO happy!  Not everyone would, however.  Try giving some people a pony and see what happens! 

[MyShadowLove]

@ScrapHappy ...

Has she been this way with other gifts you have given her?...Not knowing the dynamics of the relationship with your MIL, it is difficult to give an opinion.

If she tends to complain about most gifts, then I would agree with another poster that you have your husband pick out gifts for her from hereon or just give gift cards and she can get whatever she wants and then would only have herself to complain to!  lol

[JoyFilled Warrior]

@MyShadowLove   !!!!

.

There you are!!   Havent chatted, read you in awhile!

.

How are you doing, so far, this Holiday season??

.

Is that "Shadow" in your Nickname pic?   ADORABLE!!!

.

Missed you!!! 

.

I was just shrinking pics to put in my Nickname pic, since mine is popping out of a pumpkin, presently!

[ScrapHappy]

---

@MyShadowLove wrote:

@ScrapHappy ...

Has she been this way with other gifts you have given her?...Not knowing the dynamics of the relationship with your MIL, it is difficult to give an opinion.

If she tends to complain about most gifts, then I would agree with another poster that you have your husband pick out gifts for her from hereon or just give gift cards and she can get whatever she wants and then would only have herself to complain to!  lol

---

What she has done in the past is before the holidays or even her birthday, she starts complaining that something broke or is old and needs replacing.  One time it was her kitchen appliances.  She'll look at them for months but will never buy them until one of her kids is willing to give money towrds it.  Not us, believe me.  The latest is new living room furniture and carpet throughout the house.  I told my husband she really didn't like what we sent her.  He doesn't like to "go there" when discussing his mother.  And after all these years, I don't continue on about it.  For now on, he can decide what to get her.

[Tinkrbl44]

---

@Desert Lily wrote:

@amybI think the OP's MIL could've discreetly contacted a food pantry to pick up the items that she couldn't store, without expressing her disappointment to anyone. She might've even felt good about donating.

Next November, she could drop hints about what she'd actually like for next year's gift without saying anything negative about this year's gift.

It's sad that she didn't consider the OP's intentions & feelings this year.

---

@Desert Lily  @ScrapHappy 

I agree with you, but that would never happen, because that's not what the MIL wanted out of this exchange.

MIL wanted the SATISFACTION of knowing that the DIL would be disappointed ... again.    She is a real pro at "withholding" approval.  It cuts like a knife and she probably secretly takes great pride in her manipulations.