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Honored Contributor
Posts: 11,794
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Getting Older....

1. My goal for 2019 was to lose just 10 pounds; only 15  to go ...
 
2. Ate salad for dinner. Mostly croutons & tomatoes ... Well, really just one big, round crouton covered with tomato sauce ..
And  cheese... And sausage… FINE, it was a pizza... I ate a pizza.
 
3. How to prepare Tofu: 1. Throw it in the trash. 2. Grill some Meat.
 
4. I just did a week's worth of cardio after walking into a spider web...
 
5. I don't mean to brag but I finished my 14-day supply of diet food in 3 hours and  20 minutes ...
 
6. A recent study has found women who carry a little extra weight live longer than men who mention it...
 
7. Kids today don't know how easy they have it... when I was young, I had to walk 9 feet through shag carpet to change the TV channel...
 
8. Senility has been a smooth transition for me...
 
9. Remember back when we were kids and every time it was below zero out they closed school?  Me neither.
 
10. I may not be that funny or athletic or good looking or smart or talented, but… I forgot where  I was going with this ...
 
11. I love being over 60; I learn something new every day and forget 5 others...
 
12. A thief broke into my house last night. He started searching for money; when I woke up, I searched with him...
You never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have.
Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,297
Registered: ‎06-13-2010

Re: Getting Older....

😂😂😂😂 Too funny! I especially like number 12. Priceless! 😂😂😂

 

 

~~~All we need is LOVE💖

Super Contributor
Posts: 499
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: Getting Older....

So funny!!!!!!

Honored Contributor
Posts: 10,688
Registered: ‎07-26-2014

Re: Getting Older....

"12. A thief broke into my house last night. He started searching for money;LOL@quote.gifLOL@quote.gifLOL@quote.gif

when I woke up, I searched with him..."

 

                           haha.gifhaha.gifhaha.gifhaha.gif

 

"Never argue with a fool. Onlookers may not be able to tell the difference."
Valued Contributor
Posts: 631
Registered: ‎03-13-2010

Re: Getting Older....

@IG Thanks  for the laugh! Woman LOLCat LOLSmiley LOL

Honored Contributor
Posts: 16,025
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: Getting Older....

@IG   ThankYou! That is so funny!😄

Honored Contributor
Posts: 12,944
Registered: ‎04-18-2013

Re: Getting Older....

Hahahaha

 

Thanks for the laughs, @IG 

Respected Contributor
Posts: 3,879
Registered: ‎12-12-2010

Re: Getting Older....

These are absolutely hilarious.  I'm having a hard time selecting my favorite! Maybe #2!

It isn’t how long you live that matters; it is how well you are prepared to die.
Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,024
Registered: ‎05-09-2014

Re: Getting Older....

Convulsively funny, all of them. I did laugh out loud! Thanks. 

Honored Contributor
Posts: 26,970
Registered: ‎03-12-2010

Re: Getting Older....

My brithday is next week.  I turn 73.  Every day above ground is a good day.

 

The only thing I have wrong with me is my back.  Were it not for my back I'd be great shape. 

 

But what the hay.  I figure I'm still ahead. I know people with a lot of physical problems.

 

Everyone has a little sumptim' sumptim'...