Community Chat

[LilacTree]

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@YorkieonmyPillow wrote:

This ties into my Hypothetical Question thread..........

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@YorkieonmyPillow

I never considered that he "dumped" me though.  I just think he was 18 and ready for something more than just kissing and holding hands.  The couple in the back seat were going at it, and it scared me.  I don't know how it would have ended if I had been amenable that night at the drive-in.  He was ready to sow his oats and probably would have eventually found someone else more mature and ready as he was.

He did call me a couple of times after that date, but he always sounded as though he had been drinking.  The last time he called was three years after high school and I told him I was engaged.  I married less than a year after that and eventually moved to VA and had four babies.

[maestra]

@Shanus

I am NOT attempting to invalidate your experience. I take the viewpoint of shoulda, woulda, coulda.

Sometimes the past is too painful to revisit, even at a distance.

ETA the word 'NOT' which I failed to type when I wrote the thread. My apologies to @Shanus.

[Shanus]

@golding76. Your story has a sad beginning but ended w/ finding true love. I agree that an abusive relationship gets worse never better. Use your head and get out!

[Shanus]

@maestra. Pleasant memories are never painful.

[maestra]

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@Shanus wrote:

@maestra. Pleasant memories are never painful.

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@Shanus

Please accept my apologies and see my edited response to your thread. I failed to add the word 'NOT', which changed the tone I was hoping my thread would take.

[golding76]

Shanus, thank you.  Yes, I was so fortunate to meet and marry my second husband (who actually was my first husband in so many respects).  

I apologize for taking your lovely and sentimental thread down a sad highway, but I just felt I had to say something on abuse.  It was the major part of what went wrong.  Yes, there were signs, but I chose to ignore them.  If you haven't seen abuse, you don't know what it is and march ahead into a dangerous zone. It is an ugly thing.  Some people cannot help whatever is in them that brings them to hurt those they love.  It is THEIR problem, but it becomes yours if you suffer under them physically and/or emotionally.  You will note that I did remain friends with my first husband.  He lives in Europe, and so we do not see one another often at all.  But, when he had horrible things happen to him, I called him to help console him.  When I lost my husband, he called to help console me.  So, on one level, we carry on the civilities.  And I remained close t his father and mother.  I always loved them.

[Shanus]

@maestra. No worries. Thanks for clarification.

[patnap]

Shanus, you always post such interesting topics. I am  still with my first love. We met in high school.We were both 15. After graduation I went to work and he went to college. We married at 21 had two beautiful children.  This year in November we will be married 50 years!

[Shanus]

@patnap. Thanks for the compliment & happy you enjoy my topics. 50 yrs... definitely love!!! Congrats. 👏🏼

[lulu2]

I've told the story many times here, my husband and I met in kindergarten.  Our parish school had just 1 class at each grade level so we were in the same class K-8.  We became an item in 6th grade.  We went to brother/sister Catholic high schools. 

After graduation both our mothers forced a break-up.  My mother wanted me to date rich boys and his mother wanted him to date Italian girls.

The summer before college I spent in France. (a school trip)  I had the fling of my life with the most gorgeous (I thought) guy.  I returned smitten.  Soon after, I went to college and was sure I'd met the right guy.  We dated almost the entire year.  It came to an abrupt end when his hometown honey became pregnant. He told me the night Bobby Kennedy was assassinated.

The summer after freshman year, my husband and I started seeing each other again.  We married June, 1971 over his graduation weekend. (I'd graduated 2 weeks earlier)

My prince charming has given me a wonderful life.