Community Chat

[cherry]

I do think drama can be thrust upon you. Health problems ,a financial crisis, or the loss of someone dear ,are things we have little control over

[Moonchilde]

Stress, and Bad Things Happening to Good People, are handled all sorts of ways. My personal way is nearly always private and internal because I have never had anyone to depend on but myself and no moral support.

Something I've seen multiple times on the forums that I have to say usually cracks me up and has me eyerolling with the drama -

Within a thread, a poster who does not like being disagreed with or being presented with an alternative situation or POV is first "hurt", wounded, etc. by "harsh", "mean" words then starts to get snippy, snippier, and ends with something like "my mother and husband just died, I had the dog put to sleep yesterday and my father has Alzheimers, you horrible meanie you!" out of nowhere.

Certainly if any or all of those things had happened to me, I wouldn't be hanging out on a QVC forum in a thread where there were disagreements.

I would never give a laundry list of my troubles to strangers whom I was annoyed with in order to "shame" them or "win." Passive-aggressive isn't sympathy-making to me.

So when I see someone doing this, I tend to either disbelieve them or have no respect for them "using" such a "weapon."

This is *drama* vs. not saying anything or making a passing reference to a single loss as might be natural.

People can say whatever they like about whatever they like, but we all do judge each other - even those who say they never judge are judging those who do ;-)

[athenian]

IThere's very little drama in my life.  What there is is usually of the where is the cat hiding, what is the dog chewing variety.  

However I did work with a woman whose life outdid any soap opera for drama.  It was exhausting just listening to it.  I would never want to live it.

I agree, stress and bad things are not the same as drama.  We all have a  crisis now and then, but usually we can cry, pray, and walk through it without running and shouting like chickens.

[MyGirlsMom]

My home is my safe haven against everything bad out there in the world.  If you know me , than you know the things I will and will not allow behind my four walls.

If you want to fight, go someplace else, it's not going to happen under my roof.

When I worked, I walked away from drama and office gossip. I am a firm believer in , "if they do it with you, they'll do it to you."

I AM that old cliche, 'the last one to know' because I mind my own business and will not get involved in your nonsense. 

If you need a hand up, a shoulder to cry on..fine.  After that, it's what are you going to do to solve this situation? 

[queendiva]

I have had my share of drama, like everyone else. I try not to share it.

I do have three family members- sister, aunt and cousin- who are all big time drama queens. I associate with them as little as possible. It's okay, because the sister and cousin talk frequently.as do the the cousin and aunt. As long as they stay away from me.

[RoughDraft]

Stress and drama are two different animals.  Stress can be caused by illness, financial problems, et al. and hopefully we cope with it as best we can...grow from it, gain strength from getting through it.

In my opinion Drama should stay where it belongs like on a Broadway stage or a TV show, where after an hour or so, one can walk away, discuss it over drinks and dinner and get on with one's life.

Life is tough enough without inviting drama and dramatic people into it.  No thanks.

[Moonchilde]

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@cherry wrote:

I do think drama can be thrust upon you. Health problems ,a financial crisis, or the loss of someone dear ,are things we have little control over

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It certainly can be thrust upon you and often is - but you don't need to play into it. The things you mention are serious stress, but that's all they are - stress. People can *create* drama from these events, but it's up to those around them to accept or reject the drama, how much of it to go along with, etc.

[SaRina]

You will have drama in your life to the degree you allow it.  It took me several years to learn how to walk away from drama -- both at work and personally -- and I'm so much happier and more at peace.

Ego work is a huge part of it. If you cannot control your ego's need to be right all the time, to get one over on the next person, to have the last word....you will always have a life filled with drama.

When you're faced with less than intelligent people, people who must always be right, people who are "drama queens".... just walk away and be content to know you didn't stoop to their level or get sucked into their drama.  It's not necessary to engage. Allow their weak egos to believe they won the prize.

[YorkieonmyPillow]

Agree with the others, I hate drama!

[Drythe]

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@SeaMaiden wrote:

Are you a person with a lot of drama in your life, or very little to none? 

I have very little drama in my life now.    As a child I had a lot of drama inflicted by family members around me and which I had no control over.  Divorces, fighting, yelling etc.   As an adult I now CHOSE who and what I let into my life....no drama, no highs and lows...pretty even and steady sailing.  People who caused or now cause me angst I shut out of my life( including family members) so I can keep my life smooth and steady. I am in control and do not let others create my reality any more.  

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@SeaMaiden

Absolutely!  My family and several close friends thrived on (NEEDED) created chaos and drama.  It finally dawned on me that I did not have to have that in my life. Slowly I set boundaries and stopped associating with those who could not control those needs.  I have no regrets!  With a family of my own (7 furries + a DH), a 90 year old wonderful father, a business to manage, 2 chronic, degenerative diseases, a spirit, and a mind all to care for, nurture, or try to control I don't need it.