Community Chat

[kindred cats]

It's a moot point for me....no kids, only a fur baby. 

And he can stay forever of course.  And I pay for everything! 

[KBEANS]

My dad would not let us work while in HS. He said, "You'll be working the rest of your life." 

Guess what? Father knows best.; he was correct and I am still working! 

We all went to college or got a job. I did the same for my boys. 

My parents never asked for a dime, but encouraged us to save. 

[JeanLouiseFinch]

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@Desertdi wrote:

Sounds kinda HARSH to me...especially in a big city where housing is very high priced, and you need references to rent, transportation, food, clothing, etc.     I can see where an 18-year-old could get in some "big trouble".

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You make a good point.  18 today and the world today is MUCH different than when I was that age. 

[JeanLouiseFinch]

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@queendiva wrote:

Where would you kick them out to?

Both kids attended college at 18 following HS graduation. Both lived at home most summers. They earned their own $ for spending, gas, etc. They lived and ate meals at home at no cost as both were full time students.

Following college graduations, both achieving high honors, child #1 lived at home until age 25, when he and his now wife bought a single family home. Paid a token amount of rent during his stay as he was employed full time and was saving for a house and a wedding.

Child #2 became an officer in the military and several weeks following graduation was off to his first duty station in Europe for 3 years. Has never lived with me from that time on. Is also now married and a homeowner at age 27 and is back in the US.

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@queendiva There are parents who believe 18 is the magic number where they are no longer responsible for their children and it's time to turn them out to the world to fend for themselves. In one respect, if they were away at college, or in military service, mom  and dad woukd have to trust that they raised them well because they wouldn't know what they were doing. but at least they had a bed and meals. For kids who don't move away to college or choose the military, I imagine it's quite a scary struggle, but somehow there are those who can figure it out because they have no other choice. 

[Group 5 minus 1]

You know many of us also get old and cannot do our laundry any more. I did Moms laundry when she could not and I was glad I was able to do it for her.

[FiddleDeeDee]

Growing up, you were on your own at 18. I knew very few who lived at home. The fact that my parents allowed me to  while I went to college was a big deal but I also paid rent. That lasted 2 years and then I moved on and in with 3 other women while working full time and going to college full time. Exhausting but no regrets. My parents offered no assistance in any way. Same with DH.

Now it's a different story. Our sons have lived with us while in college and no rent. One took the scenic route with college but eventually figured it out. We have one graduating in May from HS and one the following year and both will at home while in college unless they go off and dorm. For the most part, everyone we know has their kids living at home while in college or well, just living at home. I can't think of one person be it neighbor, co-worker, family member, church member.....anyone who has kicked their kid out at 18. I'm sure it happens, however.

[Group 5 minus 1]

In fact,when our older son planned and built his new home,they put in a place for others.

We do age.

[KathyM23]

My Dad was the same way as @KBEANS dad.   When I was in high school I asked him if I could get a job and he said "no, you are a kid, be a kid while you can, you will be working the rest of your life.  So no job for me.

But I also knew that after college I must work, there would be no loafing around at home.  I lived at home until I married at age 25 and i had a full time job.   My brother worked part time in the summer to help with college.  After college he when to the mllitary, then married.  So he never lived at home after college.   Neither of us was ever charged rent.

Mom took care of house and all of us and Dad supported the family.

Requiring an 18 year old son or daughter leave home at 18 is beyond my compresention.

[Marienkaefer2]

I don't have kids, but I can share my experience.

I lived at home my first two years of college. I paid my parents rent.
It was not much, but enough to contribute. I think my dad wanted me to understand the responsibility aspect of it.

I also had a job all through college, made a car payment and paid most of my own expenses.

Didn't hurt me at all.

[SurferWife]

My son will live at home with me his entire life.  How could I make this precious baby go out in the world in his own?

🤪❤️🐶💯🌴