Beauty

[RinaRina]

On 9/24/2014 Drythe said:

In re a comment above, my low self esteem, self aggrandizing, empire building supervisor replaced someone who was THE leader in my field. What a shock! She would ask me for suggestions for problems she wasn't educated enough to articulate. When asked 'What do you think?' hoping to discover just what she was talking about, her standard answer was, 'I don't want to give MY ideas FIRST because it might bias YOUR input.' Really? You don't want to voice your ideas because you have none.

ROFLMAO! That is exactly what happens to me. She wants my ideas, then throws me under the bus each time. The only reason Y I don't quit is because for a part-time job, I make a LOT of money, and the job is very easy. .. and it's fun -- or rather, it used to be fun -- before she came along.

[brandiwine]

My DIL who I love dearly, just got a promotion at work. She has a Master's Degree, but has no idea how to deal with women in my age group. (60). She was telling my DH & I about these old ladies and that they are just waiting to retire. She said one is there just to keep her insurance benefits long enough to have knee surgery. She has trouble making decisions in her day to day life, can't imagine her managing anyone. We tried to tell her these people have been working at this company for 30+ years. They deserve respect and that she needs to really listen to what they are saying. I feel certain that's not going to happen. It's so hard when someone young comes into an established department and tries to change things and gets angry and frustrated with her "team". Experience just doesn't seem to count anymore.

I'm retired and it was the best decision I ever made.

[teainlondon]

Age discrimination is alive and well. I found that out by just looking at new hires. They were all right out of college with no experience so their pay was the bottom of the scale. I never saw an older, experienced worker hired because they had to pay the older workers so much more.

I learned quickly to keep my "old" mouth shut and sit back and watch the business fall apart. It was like watching the Three Stooges as they all fell over themselves kissing up to the boss! The place is a disaster, and I am delighted not to be there any more. What misery!

tea

[Carmie]

I suggest that you COAST at work. Coast means just do your job.. no more, no less. Don't offer to help or get involved in anything that you don't have to. You will still make the same amount of money and have less stress.

My husband was in this position about 10 years ago and he was getting ready to quit a job that he loved. If he would have quit, and had taken an early retirement, he would have lost a lot pension wise.

I told him to coast. He has coasted for about 10 years. He will now retire at the end of this year.

I, and many of my friends at work are also coasting. If the youngsters want to do it "all my themselves" let them. Just do your job, collect your check and smile.

[dragonflyveb]

Dear ladies, I really could relate to your experiences. I am in the 60+ demographic. I have the most experience in my department, but when management wants to "try something new" that we tried before and failed, they ask for our thoughts. When we bring up valid concerns, we are told we are resistant to change and close minded. The message is that management wants to hear our thoughts as long as they agree with theirs! I think I am done speaking up and they can just flounder while I watch. No more stress. And I like the suggestion of "gee, I don't know--what do you think." Thanks for reminding me to keep my mouth shut and smile.

[chrystaltree]

I'm 54, my boss is 38, her boss is 35. You are making the classic mistake of assuming you know more than your boss because you are older than she is. Stop trying to do her job and just do your own. Don't give her any suggestions unless she specifically asks. She's young but she's still your boss, put your resentment aside and give her the respect her position deserves. Why walk away from a job when you are so close to retirement?

[kyreb]

I agree and can definitely relate--- but I think this problem exists outside the workplace as well - just seems so sad that when we finally get to the age that we have so much experience and wisdom only to discover that no one is interested in listening

[Colonel Meow]

On 9/25/2014 chrystaltree said: I'm 54, my boss is 38, her boss is 35. You are making the classic mistake of assuming you know more than your boss because you are older than she is. Stop trying to do her job and just do your own. Don't give her any suggestions unless she specifically asks. She's young but she's still your boss, put your resentment aside and give her the respect her position deserves. Why walk away from a job when you are so close to retirement?

I very seldom agree with chrystaltree, but believe her bolded statement above is worthy of some thought. Many of the posters here have been referencing ageism, but it works both ways, no?

Would you feel the same irritation and hostility towards your supervisor if she was behaving the exact same way, only was closer to you in age?

[RinaRina]

On 9/25/2014 kyreb said:

I agree and can definitely relate--- but I think this problem exists outside the workplace as well - just seems so sad that when we finally get to the age that we have so much experience and wisdom only to discover that no one is interested in listening

Bingo! They don't want to listen. They're NOT even curious. They don't care what I think and they don't want to know.

[RinaRina]

On 9/25/2014 Colonel Meow said:

here have been referencing ageism, but it works both ways, no?

Would you feel the same irritation and hostility towards your supervisor if she was behaving the exact same way, only was closer to you in age?

Yes, I would. The supervisor I had 3 years ago was 4 years older than I am and I thought she was an idiot. In fact, we all thought she had dementia. So did upper management, so she was demoted -- she got a BIG demotion.

A jack@$$ is a jack@$$, regardless of age. Someone yelling at me about not using paperclips is a wacko and a control freak. I don't care if they're 38 or 68.