Re: This is messed up!

LTT1 · ‎03-09-2010

@RinaRina wrote:
@Lindsays Grandma wrote:

There are a lot of 70 year old people still working out there. I say, all the more power to them, they aren't dead yet. I planned on working until 75 but sadly a failed back surgery forced me to retire earlier. Why would still working at age 70 be problematic? I am asking you that question not to be snarky or nasty, I honestly would like to know.

What's wrong with getting paid to do what you like to do? I teach arts n' crafts to children. I like working w/ kids and I like arts n' crafts .. and I get paid. I admit, 12 hrs. isn't a lot, but I get out of the house and enjoy it.

@RinaRina

Good for you! You were bored, realized it and got out of the house to do something constructive with your life!

You should be so proud of that!

@Lindsays Grandma

i am very sorry about your failed back surgery. 💞 Sending wishes to you for healing and hopefully, as little pain as possible.

~Have a Kind Heart, Fierce Mind, Brave Spirit~

Sooner · ‎03-10-2010

@LTT1 wrote:
@RinaRina

It sounds to me like the woman is TRYING to bully you. When I ask why I know the answer: it doesn’t matter why. (She either has it in for you or she may just be that way.)

Who cares? You cannot change this situation and you have it figured out already anyway.

Bullying in the workplace appears to be so commonplace now.

If the pay or the toll the bullying takes on a person isn’t worth the sacrifice you are making; if you can afford to do so... LEAVE [which is what you are doing, no?]

Bullying always has been and always will be. We need to be teaching our kids to pay attention to why people are picking on you. Is it something you need to change or can change? That might stop it. First of all examine yourself to see if maybe, just maybe, you have a fault.

If not, if it is just mean, kids need to learn as best they can what it is and how to respond. Not saying do nothing, but you will encounter bullies all your life and our kids need to learn about responses to it, counter measures, and the self worth to let it go. They need to know as the old song says when to hold 'em, when to fold 'em and when to walk away.

Sad, but a fact of life and not giving them other alternatives other than to think they are being wronged is not helping them.

LTT1 · ‎03-09-2010

@Sooner

I agree with you.

However, I have been caught off guard!

You are right.... in that I wish I could spot what I do/what I need to do about it.

DD was so bullied (to the point of verbal abuse and by another woman) that she didn’t recognize it.

In my job as a teacher, I could look back and say I was bullied. Perhaps by the system. I believe it was partially caused by my determination to do a good job — others must have thought I was such a fool.

Another point I will make in DD’s case... watch out accepting a job in which your immediate boss can gain nothing by your completing tasks/reaching goals to the point of treating you like they wish you would just go.

So do that... just go... she did, I did, etc.

In both cases, the organizations had no replacements.

It sure makes one wonder... ?

~Have a Kind Heart, Fierce Mind, Brave Spirit~

RinaRina · ‎03-13-2010

@LTT1 wrote:
@RinaRina

It sounds to me like the woman is TRYING to bully you. When I ask why I know the answer: it doesn’t matter why. (She either has it in for you or she may just be that way.)

Who cares? You cannot change this situation and you have it figured out already anyway.

Bullying in the workplace appears to be so commonplace now.

If the pay or the toll the bullying takes on a person isn’t worth the sacrifice you are making; if you can afford to do so... LEAVE [which is what you are doing, no?]

@ Lovestoteach,

Funny you mentioned "bullying". Yesterday when I went to work, I told the kids they couldn't do something. Many of them griped because I always allow the activity. But we couldn't do it -- because (parphrasing) Mary and her BF said we couldn't. I told the class Mary and her BF are the bosses and I have to do what they say. About half the class griped again and said, (paraphrasing") .. "Mary won't let us do (the activity in question) because she's mean and bosses people around."

YOU hit the nail on head!

Out of the mouth of babies!

*BF - Figure of speech. No need to make up a guy's name

"The less you respond to negative people, the more peaceful your life will become."

CrazyDaisy · ‎03-20-2010

@RinaRina wrote:
@LTT1 wrote:
@RinaRina

It sounds to me like the woman is TRYING to bully you. When I ask why I know the answer: it doesn’t matter why. (She either has it in for you or she may just be that way.)

Who cares? You cannot change this situation and you have it figured out already anyway.

Bullying in the workplace appears to be so commonplace now.

If the pay or the toll the bullying takes on a person isn’t worth the sacrifice you are making; if you can afford to do so... LEAVE [which is what you are doing, no?]

@ Lovestoteach,
Funny you mentioned "bullying". Yesterday when I went to work, I told the kids they couldn't do something. Many of them griped because I always allow the activity. But we couldn't do it -- because (parphrasing) Mary and her BF said we couldn't. I told the class Mary and her BF are the bosses and I have to do what they say. About half the class griped again and said, (paraphrasing") .. "Mary won't let us do (the activity in question) because she's mean and bosses people around."
YOU hit the nail on head!
Out of the mouth of babies!

*BF - Figure of speech. No need to make up a guy's name

Who is being mean, didn't you just throw them under the bus, so to speak. Really vindictive and nasty on your part. Nice thing to teach the children. Good thing you are moving on to another job. If you pulled that where I work you would be on the street - TODAY.

Someday, when scientists discover the center of the Universe....some people will be disappointed it is not them.

Sooner · ‎03-10-2010

Sometimes it is difficult to distinguish between bullying and doing what you are told to do.

Mj12 · ‎03-09-2010

@RinaRina wrote:
@LTT1 wrote:
@RinaRina

It sounds to me like the woman is TRYING to bully you. When I ask why I know the answer: it doesn’t matter why. (She either has it in for you or she may just be that way.)

Who cares? You cannot change this situation and you have it figured out already anyway.

Bullying in the workplace appears to be so commonplace now.

If the pay or the toll the bullying takes on a person isn’t worth the sacrifice you are making; if you can afford to do so... LEAVE [which is what you are doing, no?]

@ Lovestoteach,
Funny you mentioned "bullying". Yesterday when I went to work, I told the kids they couldn't do something. Many of them griped because I always allow the activity. But we couldn't do it -- because (parphrasing) Mary and her BF said we couldn't. I told the class Mary and her BF are the bosses and I have to do what they say. About half the class griped again and said, (paraphrasing") .. "Mary won't let us do (the activity in question) because she's mean and bosses people around."
YOU hit the nail on head!
Out of the mouth of babies!

*BF - Figure of speech. No need to make up a guy's name

Wow.

pigletsmom · ‎11-21-2011

Why on earth would you be telling the kids anything like that? Trying to get the kids to take your side in this fight?

This is unprofessional behavior and it's no wonder you're having all of these problems there. It's also immature. This sounds like something teenage workers would do, not a 70 year old.

I'm now hoping this entire thread is just a big troll because it can't be serious.

Carmie · ‎10-25-2010

My take on things is that the OP is an aid that helps the children during the lunch period. Then she watches them right after, at their recess. If recess is indoors, she watches them indoors.

She does not teach them arts n crafts. Art Teachers teach them that. She supervises them while they play or color or build things...hence, she played trivia with them...her words.

She Texted her young supervisor many times during the few hours she worked each day. Now, he is feeling bothered by all of her texting and has asked her to bug Mary, the assistant Super. Mary doesn't have a filter like the Super and puts her off and tells her to stop bugging her among other things.

Now she thinks Mary and Super are an item..they may or not be. The OP is not happy and she thinks Mary has ruined everything for her and is trying her best to make Mary look bad. She tattles on her when she sees an opportunity.

The OP probably does not work for the school district. She was probably hired by the same people who provide the food service, hence...she works for a BIG company.

These types of aids are hard to come by. The hours are short and the pay is low, so it is difficult to get people to do this job. It's a decent job for a retiree who wants to get out of the house a few hours a day.

She says she will quit, but she won't...and she probably won't get fired either, unless she really does something wrong that endangers the children.

She will just run to the boards and complain. I have volunteered for six years now at school and know what aids do and do not do. Since she doesn't work one on one with a student or a teacher, she is a cafeteria aid or something close to it who watches kids during lunch and recess.

So much drama about nothing to gain attention.

NYC Susan · ‎03-13-2010

@CrazyDaisy wrote:
@RinaRina wrote:
@LTT1 wrote:
@RinaRina

It sounds to me like the woman is TRYING to bully you. When I ask why I know the answer: it doesn’t matter why. (She either has it in for you or she may just be that way.)

Who cares? You cannot change this situation and you have it figured out already anyway.

Bullying in the workplace appears to be so commonplace now.

If the pay or the toll the bullying takes on a person isn’t worth the sacrifice you are making; if you can afford to do so... LEAVE [which is what you are doing, no?]

@ Lovestoteach,
Funny you mentioned "bullying". Yesterday when I went to work, I told the kids they couldn't do something. Many of them griped because I always allow the activity. But we couldn't do it -- because (parphrasing) Mary and her BF said we couldn't. I told the class Mary and her BF are the bosses and I have to do what they say. About half the class griped again and said, (paraphrasing") .. "Mary won't let us do (the activity in question) because she's mean and bosses people around."
YOU hit the nail on head!
Out of the mouth of babies!

*BF - Figure of speech. No need to make up a guy's name
Who is being mean, didn't you just throw them under the bus, so to speak. Really vindictive and nasty on your part. Nice thing to teach the children. Good thing you are moving on to another job. If you pulled that where I work you would be on the street - TODAY.

I agree. It would have been far better to say, "Because it's no longer allowed." And that would be the most I would say if I felt I wanted to give any explanation at all. No names need to be brought into it. Issues that adults have with each other shouldn't trickle down to children.

I also don't think it proves a thing when kids complain about adults being mean. That's what they say when they can't get what they want. I don't see that as "out of the mouths of babes". I see it as kids wanting to do what they want and not being happy that someone in authority tells them that they can't. Encouraging them to see Mary as the Big Bad Wolf (and taking delight in it) is really, really inappropriate.