Among Friends

[RinaRina]

I used to go to my "supervisor" for everything;  questions, ideas, etc.

For the past month, he seems tentative about everything .. and acts like he doesn't want to be bothered.  Now, everytime I go to him about something he says:  "ask Mary".  (not her real name).

I just found out, my supervisor and co-supervisor are BF/GF.

IMHO, this is bad!

[dex]

@RinaRina Maybe Mary doesn’t like you always talking to him...I think you should just go ahead and ask Mary then and keep her busy so she doesn’t have so much time for her office romance.LOL

[Carmie]

Why is this bad?  I don't get it.

i have worked for married couples who owned beauty salons over the years and my own parents owned a restaurant. They always worked together.

How often do you go to your supervisor?    Maybe he is bothered and wishes you could work more independently or maybe is is busy and knows Mary can help you just as well.

Why would two people who date and work together be a problem?   Now if they have a bad break up, that might complicate things.  Does your company  have any rules about dating coworkers?

[ValuSkr]

Is Mary the co-supervisor?  I wonder why he's deferring to her on everything.  But, since she is the co-supervisor, he has every right to do so.  Maybe something came up in their relationship and you're stuck in the middle. 

[missy1]

IMO dating in the workplace usually don't turn out good. (few exceptions)

Op seems to have many dilemmas

What happened to the c0p calling on student, because of cursing?.

[RinaRina]

@ Whatnow,

That is crazy!  I do text him a lot .. but it's always about WORK. 

Last week she did something really obnoxious to me and I told her she was being disresepctful.  Everyone saw what she did.  HE texted me that evening and apologized for her behavior.  Then, the next day, she apologized to me in person.  HE made her apologize.  The excuse she gave was BS.  I listened, and excused myself.

On Friday, she did something obnoxious again and I told him.  He told me to talk to her about it.  I didn't say anything to her because I was working and I was very busy. Besides,I feel since she is a "co-supervisor", she certainly must've known exactly what she was doing.

Well, I didn't have to say anything because apparently HE told her he knew what happened, and within 15 minutes, she bolts into my room, demanding, "if you have something to say about me, you come to me directly and say it".

Whewww!

She weighs at least 300 lbs. 

I weigh 165 - I'm almost 1/2 her weight!

She's in her 20's.  So is he.  I'm almost 70! 

No way I'm gonna tangle with her!

[RinaRina]

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@Carmie wrote:

Why is this bad?  I don't get it.

i have worked for married couples who owned beauty salons over the years and my own parents owned a restaurant. They always worked together.

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It's NOT a family business.  This is a BIG company.

[RinaRina]

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@missy1 wrote:

IMO dating in the workplace usually don't turn out good. (few exceptions)

Op seems to have many dilemmas

What happened to the c0p calling on student, because of cursing?.

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You mean what happened to the kid?  NOTHING.

But he did get in trouble last week for calling this "co-supv" in question a 8*t(h.

I was standing right next to him, and honestly, I did NOT hear him say it.

NO ONE heard the boy call her a 8*+(h. 

Nevertheless,  the kid lost the battle.

Despite having NO witnesses, the supv. BF met with the father that evening and told him about the incident -- that NO ONE heard.

I told the BF NO ONE heard the boy say the word, but HE said it didn't matter.

(I suppose just "thinking" she's a 8*+(h  is punishable.)

And yes, I do have many dilemmas.  Did you see my post from 2 days ago? 

It's under the "Home" tab.

How do you polish your hardwood floors?

Looks like "Bona" is popular.

Would appreciate any suggestions ...

[Kachina624]

@RinaRina.  You are skating on thin ice if you come between these two.  I'd ask a lot less questions and make more decisions on your own.  No supervisor likes an employee who is so dependent she is a pest.

The two lovebirds are also tempting fate.  If things get nasty, I wouldn't hesitate to discuss the situation with HR.  The behavior of a couple of co-workers can be grounds for a sexual harrassment complaint as they can create a hostile enviroment, as you're discovering.  There are about a million reasons why office romances, especially involving a supervisor, are not a good idea.  When things sour between them, he will be tettering on the edge of a sexual harrassment complaint.  I wouldn't want to be in his place.  It's a lose/lose situation.

[RinaRina]

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@Kachina624 wrote:

@RinaRina.  You are skating on thin ice if you come between these two.  I'd ask a lot less questions and make more decisions on your own.  No supervisor likes an employee who is so dependent she is a pest.

The two lovebirds are also tempting fate.  If things get nasty, I wouldn't hesitate to discuss the situation with HR.  The behavior of a couple of co-workers can be grounds for a sexual harrassment complaint as they can create a hostile enviroment, as you're discovering.  There are about a million reasons why office romances, especially involving a supervisor, are not a good idea.  When things sour between them, he will be tettering on the edge of a sexual harrassment complaint.  I wouldn't want to be in his place.  It's a lose/lose situation.

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@ Kachina,

You must be psychic! 

This guy has done some stuff that he probably shouldn't be doing.  I say "probably" because I really don't know.  As a supv., maybe he has the authority to do what he does.  But in my book, it doesn't add up.

I think SHE's got him by the 8@lls because SHE KNOWS she can get him in hot water.

I think he tried to dump her once because I saw a letter she left him on the table.  Other employees saw it besides me.  She should be ashamed of herself!

I really like this guy.  But let's not be silly.  He's young enuf to be my grandson!

I don't know why the GF is always harassing me.