Reply
Honored Contributor
Posts: 16,155
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: I am a TERRIBLE bad person!

Do not let the mean people ,make you feel bad!!!!!!!!

When you lose some one you L~O~V~E, that Memory of them, becomes a TREASURE.
Honored Contributor
Posts: 16,155
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: I am a TERRIBLE bad person!


@qbetzforreal wrote:

Your husband is in a fight for his life.  Think about it.


She is well aware of that, been there myself, why not be kind?

When you lose some one you L~O~V~E, that Memory of them, becomes a TREASURE.
Respected Contributor
Posts: 4,341
Registered: ‎04-19-2010

Re: I am a TERRIBLE bad person!

I doubt OP was being serious about seeking a divorce.  Hyperbole.

I also doubt her husband can help it, making jokes might be his way of dealing with it.

 

OP, you've gotten some good ideas here.  Wishing you the best.


-- pro-aging --


Rochester, New York
Honored Contributor
Posts: 8,736
Registered: ‎02-19-2014

Re: I am a TERRIBLE bad person!

Caregiving can be a long haul thing. Doing everything you can to make it easier on yourself, and all-around nicer, is really important. That way you aren't wasting your energy on things you don't have to.

 

Shaming the OP for bringing up the issue is unhelpful and is hurtful.

When you’re accustomed to privilege, equality feels like oppression.
"Power without love is reckless and abusive, and love without power is sentimental and anemic." - Dr. Martin Luther King Jr
Honored Contributor
Posts: 33,228
Registered: ‎05-17-2010

Re: I am a TERRIBLE bad person!

Reality is not always kind. Everyone suggested talking to the doc, getting air purifiers, plug in fresheners, etc. The true issue, IMO, is the "for better or for worse" part. Yes, it's an impossible situation without obvious answers. Many have been made.

 

My opinion is just that. I'm not discounting the role of being a caregiver. I've done it, too and it's tiring and wears you out. If the OP was "joking" about walking out, that should have been clarified. My reply was based on her facts. Sorry if others find my honesty offending. 

Honored Contributor
Posts: 16,155
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: I am a TERRIBLE bad person!


@Shanus wrote:

Reality is not always kind. Everyone suggested talking to the doc, getting air purifiers, plug in fresheners, etc. The true issue, IMO, is the "for better or for worse" part. Yes, it's an impossible situation without obvious answers. Many have been made.

 

My opinion is just that. I'm not discounting the role of being a caregiver. I've done it, too and it's tiring and wears you out. If the OP was "joking" about walking out, that should have been clarified. My reply was based on her facts. Sorry if others find my honesty offending. 


It is more than your so called being honest,  i simply do not understand why people have to be so mean, unless you been through all the side effects of caring for a person that has cancer,no way to understand.

When you lose some one you L~O~V~E, that Memory of them, becomes a TREASURE.
Honored Contributor
Posts: 19,413
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: I am a TERRIBLE bad person!


@Kelseys Mimi wrote:

Placed an order with FlatD.com. Thank you!


----

Good, I hope @Carmie advice helps. You do seem rather insensitive to his problem (his jokes might cover his embarrassment and fear) so I'm glad you have a course of action instead of divorce.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 12,702
Registered: ‎08-22-2013

Re: I am a TERRIBLE bad person!

Sorry, but I laughed my a-- off reading your post. I would ask the medical staff at the hospital for a few surgical masks and maybe rent one of those electric deodorizing machines from a surgical supply they use in hospital rooms. Did the doctor say when this noxious gas period will be over, at least you would have something to hang in there for. I air kissed my husband last night and that's when I knew we have been married too long.LOL Hoping you will be married too long to.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 31,038
Registered: ‎05-10-2010

Re: I am a TERRIBLE bad person!

You should speak to his physician.  I do know, from reviewing thousands of medical records, that chemotherapy can sometimes cause severe flatulence and gas.  It's possible that they can prescribe something help.  There are also charcoal pads that people who experience severe flatulence can put in their underwear, the actived charcoal in the pads absorbs the odor.  The pads are thin, not like adult diapers.  Thin pads that the wearer tapes to the buttocks part of their underwear. You can get them at Amazon or any medical supply store.   

Honored Contributor
Posts: 33,228
Registered: ‎05-17-2010

Re: I am a TERRIBLE bad person!


@goldensrbest wrote:

@Shanus wrote:

Reality is not always kind. Everyone suggested talking to the doc, getting air purifiers, plug in fresheners, etc. The true issue, IMO, is the "for better or for worse" part. Yes, it's an impossible situation without obvious answers. Many have been made.

 

My opinion is just that. I'm not discounting the role of being a caregiver. I've done it, too and it's tiring and wears you out. If the OP was "joking" about walking out, that should have been clarified. My reply was based on her facts. Sorry if others find my honesty offending. 


It is more than your so called being honest,  i simply do not understand why people have to be so mean, unless you been through all the side effects of caring for a person that has cancer,no way to understand.


@goldensrbest   I'm having difficulty understanding why when someone asks for advice that differs from you or others, I become the "mean" one. Yes, I helped my Mom care for my Dad through 3 kinds of cancer at different times and before she passed away in March from kidney failure, I did help fill in when caretakers did not show up. I had to clean up (from both ends), so don't discount my feelings so quickly, please.