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Honored Contributor
Posts: 20,253
Registered: ‎10-04-2010

Re: Funeral Viewing Question


@cerb wrote:

May I ask a sincere question?  I have never, in my 57 years attended a viewing or visitation.  They don't seem to occur in my circle of acquaintances.  Is this common in a certain part of the country?  Or is it common with people of a certain religion or demonination?


It may be something your family didn't participate in, therefore, you had no knowledge of this being done. Maybe those circle of acquaintances you have, don't do it either.

Respected Contributor
Posts: 3,994
Registered: ‎03-19-2010

Re: Funeral Viewing Question

[ Edited ]

OP here.  Thank you for your replies.  I still have my sister and brother, so this is something I haven't experienced.  But since my family is so small, I definitely would be present at both viewings.

 

My parents elected cremation with no services, but after my father's passing my brother and I held a celebration  of life memorial for them both at their long time homestead which they held dear.

 

It is my husband's sister who recently passed.  There will be two-two hour visitations on Wednesday, one early afternoon, one early evening.  Thursday morning will be a service at the funeral home, followed by full Catholic mass at the church, then burial interment at the cemetary, followed by repass at the church.  

 

Her own family, husband, children and grands/spouses is large, 14 in all. She has four married siblings.  I am not sure what the other siblings plan, the eldest sister while in good health will probably tucker out and only attend one viewing.

 

It is a distance for DH and I.  His plans are to be present for both viewings, eating dinner inbetween.  We probably will arrive home at 9pm, then need to be up and ready to leave at 9am Thursday.  

 

Again thank you for your thoughts and guidance.

 

 

 

 

Valued Contributor
Posts: 809
Registered: ‎12-30-2010

Re: Funeral Viewing Question


@pattypeep wrote:

@Allegheny When my mother passed, we did not feel it necessary to stay with her while people visited. We felt that some people may want time alone and may feel uncomfortable with others in the room.


 

was this in a funeral home?

I am asking because I have never seen a room left empty at a wake-usually the family and many visitors are present at once after going through a receiving line

Also I would think  it would take hours to clear out a room for people to spend time privately with the deceased

I have never seen that

Regular Contributor
Posts: 204
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: Funeral Viewing Question

Yes, I would be by her side for support for as long as she needs me.

Respected Contributor
Posts: 3,994
Registered: ‎03-19-2010

Re: Funeral Viewing Question

[ Edited ]

@pattypeep wrote:

@Allegheny When my mother passed, we did not feel it necessary to stay with her while people visited. We felt that some people may want time alone and may feel uncomfortable with others in the room.


@pattypeep  I understand.  There are times when I paid my respects outside the established viewing hours when the family was not there.  Sometimes I just knew the deceased and never met any of the family and just wanted to say a final good bye to my friend.

 

I did that with my ex-father-in-law, who I liked very much.  I didn't want to be there when my ex-husband and his mother were there.  There were still hard feeling between us at the time of the death.

Respected Contributor
Posts: 4,532
Registered: ‎03-11-2010

Re: Funeral Viewing Question


@Nataliesgramma wrote:

Do what feels right and respectful for you...

 

Whoever sits there and keeps track of who comes and how long they stay are just troublemakers.....


 

 

Amen, @Nataliesgramma. Very well said.

Valued Contributor
Posts: 579
Registered: ‎12-14-2015

Re: Funeral Viewing Question

Like some have said, it to me is a preference. very personal,We have ,in ,the past 2 years had 3 young nephews and niece die 21, 23,23. one viewing all family attended ,  except my  mother. my hu.husbands nepew 23, had 6 viewings, went to the moring ones, husband  all,  I prepared  the reception brunch at our club for1300 people.  i cooked  for 3 days, happily . i think no hard fast rules apply, we should do wha we feel is appropriate.  it is very personal and stressful .  no one  should be judged .  it is a fact of life  , sad but true, we all must leave..

Maryanne
Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 5,660
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Funeral Viewing Question

1300 people attended the reception for your nephew?   I have never ever heard of such a huge attendance.  YOu cooked all the food for 1300 people?   I don't even know 1300 people.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 32,668
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: Funeral Viewing Question


@Nataliesgramma wrote:

Do what feels right and respectful for you...

 

Whoever sits there and keeps track of who comes and how long they stay are just troublemakers.....


You are at the viewing to greet other mourners and share memories and grief.  You are not taking attendance.  

Respected Contributor
Posts: 2,783
Registered: ‎03-16-2010

Re: Funeral Viewing Question

Spoiler
if any of my immediate family died, i would be there through the entire process. I could imagine not being there.