Among Friends

[cherry]

Do what makes you feel right. Only you know, all this ins and outs ,of your situation

[pattypeep]

@Allegheny When my mother passed, we did not feel it necessary to stay with her while people visited. We felt that some people may want time alone and may feel uncomfortable with others in the room.

[KathyPet]

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@happygolfcartrider wrote:

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@Allegheny wrote:

I am curious about something and would like to get understanding from others.

For example, say your sister passes.  She is local, married with grown children and grown grandchildren.  Would you feel that as sibling you need or it is your place to be present for the entire time of both visitation periods.  

I know this probably is a personal preference, but just would like to know others experiences.

I really don't have much experience in this, my mother passed before most of her siblings and I can't remember much from my father's family.  Just to preface, this is not my sibling that passed.

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You mention both visitations? Why are there two. 

I do think that a sibling should be present unless there are circumstances that prevent it. 

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IT is up to the family to decide how many visitations there are but I have been to many where where the family has two separate times on the same day.  Often from 2-4 or 3-5 and then again from 7-9 for those who cannot come during the day.

[ValuSkr]

You don't need to be there the whole time.  I'd make an appearance both days and let it go at that.  People may ask "where was Jane," but others will answer "she was here earlier" and then they'll forget about it.

[qvcfreak]

For me it wouldn't even be a question. That's my sister and nothing could keep me away. 

[RedTop]

For me personally it depends on how close I was to the deceased.   For most of my immediate family I have stayed.  However I chose not to attend the funerals of an uncle and 2 cousins who lived in this town, due to the fact we were not close, and I had not seen them, in many years.   I have not attended several funerals of my husbands close relatives, due to family drama.   

My mom and dad did not attend the funerals of 2 of his sisters.   They had created a lot of family drama, and dad distanced himself from them years before their deaths.  Like my dad, if I haven't been particularly close to the deceased while they were living, the fact that we are "family" does not guilt me into attending their funeral.   

[cerb]

May I ask a sincere question?  I have never, in my 57 years attended a viewing or visitation.  They don't seem to occur in my circle of acquaintances.  Is this common in a certain part of the country?  Or is it common with people of a certain religion or demonination?

[cherry]

It's a Christian thing, and all denominations that I know  of ,observe it

[sunshine45]

YES.......i think it is important to be there for all viewings, the service, graveside service, and gathering afterwards......unless you have a physical disability that would prevent you from being at all of these.

[Nataliesgramma]

Do what feels right and respectful for you...

Whoever sits there and keeps track of who comes and how long they stay are just troublemakers.....