Dilemma - Page 2

alicedee · ‎07-25-2010

I would send an occasional text or FB message and a Christmas card.

Not everyone has the same needs and expectations from relationships outside their immediate family. She may be depressed, have family or personal issues she is dealing with she doesn't want to share...who knows? I know for myself, when I have something going on, I don't feel like chatting....and I share with very few.

It's also possible something you said or did may have caused her to pull back. Again, who knows?

People sometimes just grow apart....doesn't mean they don't like each other anymore, just their lives are off in a different direction.

jackthebear · ‎03-11-2010

@OhioAngel wrote:
What do you do when a friend you have had for around 6 years doesnt keep in touch now? The situation is that we had not gotten together over the past 3 years, it was her not me. I wanted to and tried to set something up. She does have some health issues so I am very understanding of it. With texting and with facebook messages, we kept in touch. Over about the last 3 months she doesnt reply to my messages but she does post on facebook almost daily.

When the family lost their niece and an inlaw, I sent a message and a card. I heard nothing from her. I send some hello facebook message, thinking of you messages and more.

Finally I just stopped and left her alone and will wait to see if I hear from her. It has been about 3 months now.

Would you keep leaving her alone and wait too?

leave it

she may be distancing from you for who knows what reason-- which it all probability has nothing to do with you as a person

or life gets in the way,

don't go looking for trouble

if you are you facebook, unfollow her posts so you won't see them all the time

itsmagic · ‎08-08-2011

I would let it go too. I think you have given her a chance to interact and for whatever reason she doesn’t want to.

qbetzforreal · ‎08-28-2010

Some people come and go. Let her and it go.

Love my grandkids · ‎11-24-2013

@OhioAngel I agree with those who said drop it.

Friendships sometimes just die a natural death. She knows how to get in touch **if she wants to**. It's clear that she does not.

Stop worrying about it. The friendship is over.

NicksmomESQ · ‎08-19-2014

That happened to me twice a couple of years ago.One friend I had for 30 years stopped e mailing me.We spent years emailing back & forth with an occasional phone call. She suddenly stopped.Never had an argument.I called her twice & left messages on her machine.She never called back.

I stopped emailing & calling.Never heard from her again.I recently found out through the grapevine that she was having an affair & left her husband.

Another friend I was e mailing with for years suddenly stopped too. After a few attempts at reaching out I let it go. After several months she reconnected with me to ask why I stopped e mailing her!! I told her my time was important & I wasn't going to chase after her. She apologized & we picked up where we left off.

My advice to you is to let it go. If you're important to her she'll reach out.If not she isn't worth your time.

kaydee50 · ‎02-07-2011

Personally, I've just "deleted" from my email addresses several people I haven't heard from in months and/or years. Don't know why I kept them so long. It is liberating!

LindaSal · ‎05-15-2014

I agree with those who said to leave her alone. Regardless of her life situation, which you don't even know if there is one, it can become bothersome to people. I know if I don't want to be bothered, the last thing I want is for someone to keep trying.......just let it be.

hckynut · ‎03-10-2010

@OhioAngel

To answer your question, YES! I can relate directly to your situation with a close friend of mine since the 1960's. I worked with him and he also played for 4 decades in my adult hockey league.

We communicated primarily by phone because after he quit playing in my hockey league I did not see him very often. Didn't see him because he lives in another city in our state.

We always stayed in touch by calling each other, I did much of the calling to him. Our conversations were always an hour or more. The last time I called him we were in the middle of a conversation when he said "I've got another call, catch you later". That was over a year ago.

He uses only a cell phone and has changed numbers several times. When he moved to California it changed. When he moved to Florida it changed. When he moved back to Nebraska it changed. I have had the same land line number since 1972.

He does not know or care how to use a computer or any form of electronic communication. The telephone is it. Since his abrupt dismissal of me in our last call, to answer an obviously a more important call than mine, I have not heard from him since. I don't even know if he still lives in the state!

I have done all I intend to do, the ball/call is now in his court. "Whatever will be Will be". It's sad, but it is what it is!

hckynut 🏒

hckynut(john)