Mom to Mom

[godi]

Next year make YOU your valentine. A spa day perhaps or a new outfit. Stop buying for the others. It was nice of you but they don’t care about Valentine’s Day. 

[Love my grandkids]

@corvettesandy IMO you are going way overboard for a casual holiday. It gives the impression you are giving with the expectation that you will receive.

Maybe those you are giving to are feeling overwhelmed or feeling innundated by all this. I'd say back off from all the giving. It comes across as being very needy.

[phoenixbrd]

@corvettesandy Every thing is a matter of perspective.  Next year consider Valentine's day as a treat to yourself for all the wonderful things you have done for others.  Give yourself a gift...go for a massage, take a scented Epsom salt bath, pack a picnic and go somewhere special. You can chose to keep it a secret or invite some girlfriends to have a Valentine's lunch at a favorite restaurant as a reminder of all you/your friends do throughout the year for others.  Make it your special day and forget all the cards to others.  This is just a suggestion, of course, but I bet you would have a fun time, love/respect yourself, and feel a lot happier.

[newagain888888]

You have a kind and tender heart. It’s natural tend to see things through our own caring and assume others might feel and respond in kind. It would be a wonderful if things were that way.

The sad truth is by allowing our own emotions to be dependent on others,  we are setting ourselves up for a lifetime of hurt. Some people just aren’t givers or reciprocators, some give but not in ways you might expect, some lack awareness and/or gratitude, some have needs or hurts of their own, some are us are just overwhelmed with life. The point is that you have no control over any of that.

For your own happiness, do what you feel from the heart and let go of all expectations. If you do things things purely for the joy it brings you and for the love you are sending that person, you can’t go wrong. If you feel anything less than that, don’t do it. If it’s a burden or a financial hardship for you, don’t do it. If you feel resentment that your efforts are not appreciated, better to stop. We often give to others what we need for ourselves. Don’t wait for others to remember you. Put yourself on your list and regularly do little things that remind you of the wonderful, deserving person that you are! 

[Justice4all]

Each day is Valentine's day

[1Snickers]

@corvettesandy   I give my youngest Granddaughter Valentine gifts and now my Great Grandbaby. I give my son a card and treat bag with Snickers. 

He used to give me a card but the last few years hasn’t. He is frugal! I did rather miss the card.

I send two Cousins cards and small treat bags for two friends. Sometimes one of us forgets and it’s no big deal.

BUT...If my Husband would have ever forgotten I would not get him Snickers!

One year ages ago I put up our Christmas stockings and mentioned that we should all put little things in them.

Theirs were overflowing and my Son had put some things in mine.At the toe was a box wrapped from my Husband.It was filled with nuts and bolts from his workbench!

We all had a big laugh,and I know that men think differently!

[jeanlake]

I like what Allegheny said -- she quit going overboard (expecting others to reciprocate). 

I gave chocolate hearts to my children when they were at home and now to their children. My children have their own Valentines to focus on.

Let go of expectations. Happier now.

[LoveMyBaby]

@newagain888888 

---

@newagain888888 wrote:

You have a kind and tender heart. It’s natural tend to see things through our own caring and assume others might feel and respond in kind. It would be a wonderful if things were that way.

The sad truth is by allowing our own emotions to be dependent on others,  we are setting ourselves up for a lifetime of hurt. Some people just aren’t givers or reciprocators, some give but not in ways you might expect, some lack awareness and/or gratitude, some have needs or hurts of their own, some are us are just overwhelmed with life. The point is that you have no control over any of that.

For your own happiness, do what you feel from the heart and let go of all expectations. If you do things things purely for the joy it brings you and for the love you are sending that person, you can’t go wrong. If you feel anything less than that, don’t do it. If it’s a burden or a financial hardship for you, don’t do it. If you feel resentment that your efforts are not appreciated, better to stop. We often give to others what we need for ourselves. Don’t wait for others to remember you. Put yourself on your list and regularly do little things that remind you of the wonderful, deserving person that you are! 

---

perfect response, well stated👍🏼

[BirkiLady]

Guess our family is unique. I send Valentine Day cards to my son and DIL and grandson every year. They send me cards for my birthday (the 13th) and Valentine's Day (14th), as well. We were raised to acknowledge loved ones with cards and gifts when appropriate. (We also go out to dinner as a family to celebrate my birthday, usually a few days before Valentine's Day to avoid the rush at restaurants).

How would my son be a thoughtful husband if he wasn't a thoughtful son? My grandson is "in training" to become a thoughtful boyfriend or husband much later in his life. Right now, he is thoughtful to his mom, dad, me and his other grandparents. It's a good life lesson to teach them early. We all write thank you notes, as well. 

Also, sent cards to friends who have helped me throughout the past several weeks with groceries, errands, Doctor's appointments and "check-in calls". They were all surprised to receive my cards this year! 

[CalminHeart]

I don't mind it when I don't hear anything from my kids on Valentine's Day since it's really for couples.  I have one child who always forgets me on Mother's Day, birthday, Christmas, Thanksgiving, etc.  I don't need a card but I'd love a phone call.