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Respected Contributor
Posts: 2,245
Registered: ‎04-16-2010

Re: what would you do if ex-lover texted your husband?

[ Edited ]

@chiclets wrote:

It is not difficult to get cell phone numbers etcetera.

 

The text was sent to your husband. The reaction to the text has to come from him.

 

The manner in which he responds is his decision.

 

What follows is between you and your husband to speak about openly. Denying is not confronting a issue which is going to bother you.

 

You may want him to ignore it however I doubt if you would feel sure if he would or did. You may want to tell him what to say but that would not be a truthful response due to the fact it is your response.

 

He is in control. 

 

You will always wonder unless you are sure of your husband and that is why a conversation needs to take place. There is no avoiding an adult marriage open conversation.

 

 

 

 


 

 

@chiclets 

That's exactly what I was saying.  Your wording is more precise. Excellent! I hope @Helen Bach will read it!!!

Honored Contributor
Posts: 17,303
Registered: ‎03-11-2010

Re: what would you do if ex-lover texted your husband?


@Foxxee wrote:

"he's all confused on how to respond."

 

Really?  What's to be confused about?  I'd be suspicious if he didn't tell her to pound sand.  


men are, on the whole, simple naive creatures

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 5,311
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: what would you do if ex-lover texted your husband?


@jackthebear wrote:

@Foxxee wrote:

"he's all confused on how to respond."

 

Really?  What's to be confused about?  I'd be suspicious if he didn't tell her to pound sand.  


men are, on the whole, simple naive creatures


 

@jackthebear   Thanks for the laugh!!

"My desire to be well informed is currently at odds with my desire to remain sane."
Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 7,776
Registered: ‎02-13-2021

Re: what would you do if ex-lover texted your husband?

If any of this is to be believed:

 

 

You stated that "he still has feelings for her."  I must ask (are you sure)?. If so, how did you arrive at this conclusion ~ did hubby tell you?  Are you assuming?  If you know for a fact that he still has feelings for his ex, why did you marry him?  Finally, why are you seeking answers from strangers on a message board about your marriage?

 

You have a much bigger problem than how your husband should respond to a text from an ex girlfriend at this moment.

 

Forget the text.  No one has to respond to a text message.  Sit down and talk to your husband if you THINK he's still in love with his ex.  Just to be clear "feelings" for the purposes of your post and this discussion I am equating with love. 





A Negative Mind ~ Will give you a Negative Life
Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,429
Registered: ‎07-10-2011

Re: what would you do if ex-lover texted your husband?

If the person was interested in the OP's husband she would have said something like this: Just checking to see how you and that  woman you live with are doing, not  checking to see how you and your WIFE are doing.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 9,496
Registered: ‎06-10-2010

Re: what would you do if ex-lover texted your husband?

What I would do (if he asked my advice) is ask him what he would want me to do if it were me that got a text from an ex-lover?     

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Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,862
Registered: ‎06-07-2010

Re: what would you do if ex-lover texted your husband?

[ Edited ]

Last year, my husband's ex (of more than 30 years ago) reached out to him on facebook.  I saw the post before he did and I did tell him about it.  He did not respond to her and I blocked that B**ch so fast!

Honored Contributor
Posts: 20,648
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: what would you do if ex-lover texted your husband?


@Mz iMac wrote:

 

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I love that movie!

Super Contributor
Posts: 429
Registered: ‎03-12-2010

Re: what would you do if ex-lover texted your husband?

You are all so wise and generous for your responses.   I can't answer everyone's questions but I was in the same room as hubby when his phone pinged.  He offered up the info to me freely.  I guess she used the internet to find his phone #, which he's had for 25 years the same #.  Especially thanks to those of you who asked their own husbands what they would do!  We will see how this plays out but I'd hate to go all Anglea Bassett on him  

Spoiler
 
Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,120
Registered: ‎03-29-2019

Re: what would you do if ex-lover texted your husband?

[ Edited ]

I have a male friend that I have known since high school.

 

He is married and has a 13 year old daughter.

 

 

We are friends on Facebook.

 

 

never write anything on his board that I wouldn't want his wife to see.

 

 

There is nothing wrong with people of the opposite sex still being friends, even if one or both parties are married.

 

Everybody is assuming that the ex is trying to steal the husband.

 

 

Isn't it also possible that she is just saying "Hi! How are you?", with no "sinister" motive behind it ?

 

 

Why automatically assume the worst?

 

All I see is women acting like cats in a fight.

 

 

Women are marking their "territory", like a dog lifting its leg.

 

Yes, I know that I'm using mixed metaphors , so what.

 

 

Either the wife trusts the husband to handle the situation, or she doesn't.

 

 

If the marriage is good and strong, she shouldn't need to resort to childish responses and tactics, such as "blocking that *it©h!". She would trust her husband and not feel threatened by an ex simply saying ”Hi".

 

If there are issues in the marriage, then the ex saying "Hi", really isn't the problem, is it?

The Sky looks different when you have someone you love up there.