Posts: 62
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Many years ago after I graduated from High School and didn't know if I wanted to go to college, I worked full time and lived at home.  May parents charged me a nominal amount for rent.  After 2 years I decided I wanted to go to college.  They handed me back all the rent money I had paid them.  


The rent money was requested from them so I would understand that being an adult came with responsibilites.

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,392
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Son came back home to save money for school and we are blessed financially so we don't charge him for anything. He has a full time job. 

I even go as far as asking him if he needs/wants anything when I go to the groceries.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 19,304
Registered: ‎10-25-2010

@Commoner Exec Mr Wilkes wrote:

Seems like lots of enabling Mommies. 


Wouldn't be surprised if they criticized same behavior in others.

By your definition, my parents enabled me and my siblings and we all enable our children as well.


It is a good thing.  We all own our own homes and make a nice living.  As our parents grew old, we helped them too.  There were five of us and we were all in to provide whatever they needed.


We all help one another emotionally, physically  and financially.  I have been blessed.  We all pay it forward and help strangers and friends too.

I wouldn't want to live any other way.  My children all have keys and drop in whenever they want to.  This will always be their home base.

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 5,700
Registered: ‎07-10-2011

@Posh Poodle  I had never seen a red-headed poodle before until I saw that one at Home Depot. It was so amazing that the lady's children decided to dye the poodle red. At that time I had only seen white, black  and I think brown poodles.


I didn't know red-headed poodles existed. I've really

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 7,184
Registered: ‎05-09-2010
My Dad charged me a small rent payment when I moved back home after graduating from college and was working full time. When I got married 15 months later, he gave it all back to me. To answer the question, if the child was working, I think they should contribute financially to the household.
Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else. Margaret Mead
Super Contributor
Posts: 406
Registered: ‎06-27-2011

@Sage04   Nutmeg was my first poodle after getting married. My sister had an apricot colored poodle Cinnamon. We lost our black toy poodle Mocha 2 years ago. Our rescue Baby Ruth has a gray body and white face--we call her pretty possum face. 

interestingly, each color poodle has different personalities. 

Nutmeg was very empathic and obedient. The perfect apartment poodle.
Cinnamon was sweet yet independent and playful.

Mocha, who lived the longest thus far at 18.5 years, was very courageous. She lived life on her terms and faced whatever life threw at her and then plowed through it! Her black color made Mocha so elegant and statuesque. 
Baby Ruth had a rough start in life so she distrusts men--all but my husband and dad. She's very protective of me, and can be quite demanding. She is the most loving and thankful poodle I have ever met. She's also the cuddliest.


It is fun seeing their personalities shine!

Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,929
Registered: ‎06-08-2021

@sunshine45 wrote:

in my culture, we take care of our family members.

it is one of the most important things in our lives.....FAMILY.

we had relatives where there were 4 generations living under one roof, both here and abroad. the old take care of the young, and the young take care of the old. it wasnt a chore and it wasnt a burden. it is a wonderful way to share love, respect, togetherness, wisdom, knowledge, and fun. it is worth more than any $$$$$ amount you could imagine.


it may not be for everyone for whatever reason, but once you experience it, it is not something you ever want to forget.


some may not agree, but this is OUR FAMILY and it has worked well for us for many, many years.


(i already answered the question earlier in this thread, but wanted to add a bit more as to why i feel this way......)




That sounds awesome to me, the way it should be....

Honored Contributor
Posts: 18,801
Registered: ‎04-28-2010

I haven't read every single post, but just thinking that it would depend on the mom's/dad's finances.


If they are on a fixed income, etc., and might need a bit of reimbursement in order to keep their finances from 'dwindling downward', then adult children paying rent would be a welcome situation.


For folks who have more or less unlimited finances, then whatever they all are comfortable with is another option.


'Still' children (even mid to older teens) doing their own laundry is a 'big one' for me.  


Doing everybody's laundry can be (almost) a full time job.  


Lots of good luck to all......





'More or less', 'Right or wrong', 'In general', and 'Just thinking out loud ' (as usual).
Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,722
Registered: ‎10-02-2021

@Danky2 wrote:

@Commoner Exec Mr Wilkes wrote:

Seems like lots of enabling Mommies. 


Wouldn't be surprised if they criticized same behavior in others.

Do you EVER work or is that just a " wish I was " pretend name ?

Good one. I'll go with PRETEND.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 13,619
Registered: ‎07-15-2016

Live for free until they got settled ...  I was in that situation myself in 1989.