Re: Wedding guest lists

Trailrun23 · ‎05-31-2022

The trip isn't really that big of a deal; I think I can reschedule later, but it will have to wait quite awhile. I think I didn't make the final cut on the guest list...but I find it rude to send out tons of save the date cards if you don't want everyone to save the date.

Trailrun23 · ‎05-31-2022

Yes I keep in touch with this former colleague; we retired within a year of each other. I have met her daughter several times; she lives in another town so is not here very much. Weddings have really changed and I wonder if my friend sent the cards out or if her daughter sent them.

ValuSkr · ‎03-15-2014

Maybe they had to pare down the guest list and you missed the cut. Lay low and count your blessings.

haddon9 · ‎03-09-2010

@Trailrun23 wrote:
The trip isn't really that big of a deal; I think I can reschedule later, but it will have to wait quite awhile. I think I didn't make the final cut on the guest list...but I find it rude to send out tons of save the date cards if you don't want everyone to save the date.

@Trailrun23 I agree that it IS RUDE to send out save the date cards but no invitations! When my daughter sent out hers last year I told her that if you send a save the date card to people you MUST send them an invitation! It's just wrong not to!

On the other hand if you're not invited and are grateful to not have to go as several posters have mentioned here that is a whole different topic! I have been happy about not having to attend certain events in the past because I just knew that I wouldn't have a good time.

Ronettes · ‎12-13-2022

@Trailrun23 wrote:
Yes I keep in touch with this former colleague; we retired within a year of each other. I have met her daughter several times; she lives in another town so is not here very much. Weddings have really changed and I wonder if my friend sent the cards out or if her daughter sent them.

It can be surprisig how people change, when you don't see them / work with them all the time.

They don't mean it, it just happens!

RollTide2008 · ‎02-14-2017

@Daisy Sunflower wrote:

@faeriemoon wrote:

On another note, the "save the date" practice is a bunch of nonsense. Anyone you know well enough to invite to your wedding knows the date. People you don't know that well but for some reason you have to invite are no great loss if they don't come.

I agree. I never cared for the "save the date" thing. It sounds like the people getting married think they are so special that everyone would want to have advance notice so they don't make any other plans for that day. jmo

I don't think they're necessary if you live in the same town you grew up in and your whole family does too. If you need to make travel arrangements for an event, it's helpful to have an early heads up.

sophiesofers · ‎11-10-2016

My son got married 2 years ago. They were registered on TheKnott.com so when the invitations went out, instead of mailing back RSVP cards, the Knott had a link for the guest to sign in for RSVP. Saved alot of money for postage and such by not having actual RSVP cards. This is something that I have been seeing lately for weddings. Many couples are doing away with the RSVP cards that you would have to mail back.

mimomof4 · ‎03-08-2018

If I didn't receive an invitiation I would assume I had not been invited and move on with my life. I wouldn't make an akward phone call to someone I don't speak to often.

Unless it was someone I was close to I also wouldn't reschedule any of my previous plans for a wedding. I would have continued with my original plans and sent a gift if invited explaining I already had plans.

occasionalrain · ‎03-10-2010

Save the date cards are appropriate for events that don't require an invitation, family reunions, annual meeting, church fair...To send a save the date card for a wedding without a follow up invitation is unacceptable and likely to cause hurt feelings.

Those close enough to be invited, no matter what, know the date, so better to save the postage and skip sending save the date cards.

Burnsite · ‎03-10-2010

I received a "save the date" and then no invitation, but called my sister in law, the bride's mother, to ask her if I was invited. She said, of course you are.

It made everyone a bit edgy, since only her dad's people (i.e., us) were not sent invitations. They are a nice young couple, but the wedding was a little weird overall.