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Super Contributor
Posts: 297
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

My college age child told me a friend of hers was traveling in Europe this week.

I asked 'who is she traveling with'?  She then told me she doesn't use 'she' anymore

it's 'they or 'them'.

 

This one is hard for me to wrap my head around. Why deny your gender? Is that a bad thing?  They or them is plural so are you speaking about one person or a group?

 

How can I understand this?

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Honored Contributor
Posts: 15,632
Registered: ‎10-04-2010

Re: Using 'they' or 'them'??

Just do it your way.  I don't believe we have to accept everything people throw in our path.  We can still be respectful.  

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Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,752
Registered: ‎03-10-2013

Re: Using 'they' or 'them'??

Wouldn’t the singular non gender form of she or he be “it”? 

 

Where is it going on vacation? Is that what is meant?

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Honored Contributor
Posts: 25,929
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Using 'they' or 'them'??

I think I would have looked at her and said "What on Earth are you talking about? You don't call one person They. How much is your education costing me? And this is what they are teaching you?"

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Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 7,059
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Using 'they' or 'them'??

Haha!  I would have said, "Okay since it's only one person we're referring to then, where is IT going?"


@OKPrincess wrote:

Wouldn’t the singular non gender form of she or he be “it”? 

 

Where is it going on vacation? Is that what is meant?


 

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Honored Contributor
Posts: 17,739
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Using 'they' or 'them'??

[ Edited ]

You will hear all sorts of things that  might give you pause. She is seeing an entirely new world ,and things are appealing to her.

 

I would just speak like I always did, and not lecture her. It will do absolutely no good at all, and  might do a lot more harm, than it is worth making a fuss over. 

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Respected Contributor
Posts: 4,863
Registered: ‎01-27-2014

Re: Using 'they' or 'them'??

I don’t think it’s a big deal, particularly given how many “real” errors people in speaking every day. I am, however, very offended by folks using “he” generically. That is a sexist practice. I routinely correct people that insist on using masculine pronouns to represent everyone. 

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Honored Contributor
Posts: 9,751
Registered: ‎05-01-2010

Re: Using 'they' or 'them'??

@Petepetey. Actually, I think your best bet is to ask your daughter to explain it. I don't think anyone here would know what is in your daughters mind.

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Honored Contributor
Posts: 8,179
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: Using 'they' or 'them'??

[ Edited ]

Some places require this. Unless it's a legal issue, then I will continue to address people how I want: using: she, he,Mr., Mrs, female, girl etc.

 

 

http://genderfluidsupport.tumblr.com/gender

Here's a list of all the genders.

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Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 5,524
Registered: ‎06-10-2015

Re: Using 'they' or 'them'??

Thats got to be one of the most stupid things I have heard in a long while.

Dear God
Grant me the wisdom to know when to keep my mouth shut.
Thank You Amen