@De Anna ...Something hit me when I read your post, I felt your words. For a good part of my adult life I had many ups and downs and there were times I wondered how I would get through it. I strongly believe I am a survivor, no matter how many times I was knocked down I came back up stronger.
Life can be hard but we must never let the negative things get the best of us, we fight back, that's how we win. Stay strong, you will and can get through anything that is thrown at you, you know why? Because you are woman, just like the song says, "I am woman." "Hear me roar, I am invincible." Look up Helen Reddy's song every now then let the words give you the strength to fight the battles. 
The moving finger writes; And having writ, Moves on: nor all your Piety nor Wit Shall lure it back to cancel half a Line Nor all your Tears Wash out a Word of it. Omar Khayam