Respected Contributor
Posts: 4,165
Registered: ‎10-26-2010

Snarky Comments

[ Edited ]

Usually I try to ignore such comments, but, for the past year or so a certain neighbor feels the need to be unkind.  For whatever reason, she only makes comments if another person is present. 


For instance, I was working outside wearing faded jeans and a tee shirt, no makeup except for eyebrows (I don't have any).  Anyway, she and her husband were passing by and stopped to chat.  The husband said my hair looked nice(I had lost my hair due to illness in the past).  Before I could say thank you, she chimed in with "she always likes to look like a beauty queen"!!  Beauty queen????  I was a sweaty mess from weeding!!!  I didn't acknowledge her comment, but, thanked the husband about noticing my hair and said I needed to get back to work.


A month or so later we ran into this couple at a local eatery.  I was wearing a D&Co tee shirt dress and flats.  Yes, I was showered, had makeup and jewelry on, and my hair was fixed.  Her first comment was " well, aren't you fancy??".  I smiled and my husband said our table was ready.


At my age, I really don't want or need a confrontation, however, I can't figure out why this woman is being so snarky.  We have known her for 30+ years, as neighbors more so than friends.  She has made comments over the years and I have ignored them.  Ever since my illness and recovery she is worse.  I am not the only neighbor that gets these remarks either.


Thanks for listening!!!!  I think I will just continue to not comment to her.  Although, some days I would really like to shut her up!  I just don't understand why some people feel the need to be so unkind, especially to people they really only know to see.

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,454
Registered: ‎01-13-2013

Sounds like she is JEALOUS.


Her husband complimented you, so therefore you must be taken down a peg or two.




Just continue being awesome while she watches helplessly....Woman LOL

Honored Contributor
Posts: 9,729
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

@grandma r-


And she probably feels better herself by putting you down because you do look nice.

A natural cruel streak.

I would just realize that is her personality and be glad you aren't like her, continually hurting other people on purpose!

You can feel sorry for her.


"If you walk the footsteps of a stranger, you'll learn things you never knew. Can you sing with all the voices of the mountains? can you paint with all the colors of the wind?"
Honored Contributor
Posts: 15,158
Registered: ‎06-27-2013

@grandma r

I posted in Positive Thoughts a few weeks ago that people who tear you down do so because of their insecurities and turmoil in their lives. 


In other words, you’re not the problem, she is. 



Respected Contributor
Posts: 2,321
Registered: ‎03-16-2010

I totally agree with the two responses!  Jealousy -- plain and simple.  I feel sorry for her that she can't accept her husband giving someone a nice compliment.  She must have little or no self-confidence.


Just keep doing what you are doing.  You are the better person.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 14,160
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Ugh there are some women who can not stand when others get attention, we need to build each other up not tear each other down

Stop being afraid of what could go wrong and start being positive what could go right.
Honored Contributor
Posts: 15,851
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

If you look better than her when you are dirty from weeding, my guess is she is jealous. Ask her husband quite bluntly, "is she always this rude?"

Respected Contributor
Posts: 4,165
Registered: ‎10-26-2010

Thanks, ladies.  I suppose some people make themselves feel better at the expense of others.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 52,175
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Perhaps this person is not so much snarky as she is socially inept and doesn't know how to deliver a compliment or greeting without sarcasm.   Since she does it to other people too, I wouldn't take it personally and just consider the source.  I think you've handled it well, just continue to ignore her.  I bet she has few, if any, friends.

New Mexico☀️Land Of Enchantment
Respected Contributor
Posts: 4,165
Registered: ‎10-26-2010

@AuntG .I'd love to, but, he has to go home with her!!!!  Besides, I've heard her talk to him and it is not nice!!!