Rudeness from stranger. What would you do? - Page 19

Deanie · ‎03-09-2010

@sidsmom Well, I go to the gym at least 3 times a week and it is ALWAYS the men who are the "chatty kens" They stand around in the midst of all the equipment discussing last nights game, or who is going to be picked this season, or how long they were in Florida, etc etc. IMHO, it is rarely the women. I sometimes get annoyed since I have to walk in between groups of them having their conversations or use other equipment since they are clustered around a piece I want to use. Sigh....I would never think of telling them to "shut up" One of them may hit me with a bar bell.

SaRina · ‎04-17-2015

@segrl21 wrote:
@Sooner wrote:
I would have said "I'm sorry" to the man; said "I'll talk to you later" to my friend and gone back to my workout.
I know this an option but seriously please explain why anyone would apologize to a bully like this man? I'm too honestly to proud to let talk to me the way this man did the OP.

@segrl21, because it can be a calming tactic for the bully. He's already on the defensive and not expecting someone to be polite and apologize. The OP (for example) doesn't need to "mean" the apology, she would only need to say it. It may cause the bully to realize he is over-reacting and he may feel sheepish or regretful.....or it may do nothing. But it's worth a try. If he bullies the OP a second time, then I would report him to management.

One is always taking a risk by running straight to management and "tattling", but I'm glad it worked out for the OP.

I think sucking up one's pride (again, it's all about the ego, isn't it?) to make an apology shows that one is a mature person who is taking the high road. Also, as I said earlier in the thread, you can kill more flies with honey.

The other option -- to stoop to this man's level by telling him off -- only shows you are at his immature level. Engaging with a bully usually escalates the situation too.