Community Chat

[Jordan2]

I work in a school as an aide supervising children during lunch and recess (pre-k-2nd grade). There is another aide who is around my age who picks on me. I don't know what her problem is with me, but she doesn't do it to anyone else. I'm easy going, so maybe she thinks she can get away with it regarding me. Other people see that she bullies me ( she once yelled at me across the soccer field for everyone to hear).I will answer her back ( I told her never speak to me that way again), she always has an answer when she does something I don't like, I can't win. She thinks nothing of any of this but it bothers me. 

[ajsidney12]

Not knowing specifics of the actual comments, next time she does it warn her that you will report her for her behavior. You are in charge of children and her disrespecting you shows the kids that the behavior is acceptable, when in actuality she should be a good role model for them to follow.

[kaydee50]

Do you have a supervisor that could intercede?  If not, is this a paying job or volunteer?  In either case I would leave and notify those in charge why you're doing so.

[Rockycoast]

You told her to stop. It hasn't worked.  She is setting a very bad example for the young children. Bullying is never right at any age, They can see what is going on also. 

I would talk to the supervisor/principal next. See if they will have a talk with her to stop the bullying.

[mildoo]

She's jealous of you, pure and simple.  Something you have, something you are capable of doing, the way you look, present yourself to people or children.  Something you have or do that she lacks is driving her mad.  She's an envious, vindictive, small minded person lacking in a lot of areas.   She perceives you to be more than she is (and she is probably right), so be that person and don't let her diminish you.   She will eventually  trip herself up in someway and a person who counts will notice and she'll lose her job.  Stay the course, be yourself and be confident around her.  

[Cakers3]

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@Jordan2 wrote:

I work in a school as an aide supervising children during lunch and recess (pre-k-2nd grade). There is another aide who is around my age who picks on me. I don't know what her problem is with me, but she doesn't do it to anyone else. I'm easy going, so maybe she thinks she can get away with it regarding me. Other people see that she bullies me ( she once yelled at me across the soccer field for everyone to hear).I will answer her back ( I told her never speak to me that way again), she always has an answer when she does something I don't like, I can't win. She thinks nothing of any of this but it bothers me. 

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@Jordan2  You can't win? What do you expect/want to win🤔

She isn't going to change. All you can do is change yourself.  Your reaction means she lives in your head and she knows it.

Most of us have dealt with unreasonable co-workers in our lives.

Reporting her will be looked at as being a tattletale. Even though you say others see her behavior do you really want to drag them into this (I don't know if you have I'm just asking).

Do your job and forget her. Your job is as an aide, not to change another person. Trying to do that leaves you stressed and carrying it home and here. Guarantee she doesn't give you a second thought.

I don't know exactly what she says or yells across a field etc.

She has your number because she knows you will react.

Good luck. Change your perception, not her.

[Sooner]

@Jordan2 I am not usually one to go higher up until there's no other option, but in this case, yes I would go talk to your supervisor and calmly outline the problem and ask is this sort of atmosphere ok where you work?

I'd say 'OK' not tolerated, say that you are worried about the example for the children, etc.  Don't say "tolerated" or put it on an accusatory level.  Keep it calm and as a productive comment, an idea for some change etc. and on a positive and calm note.  You are worried about the kids not you.

It will tell you if this is ok or not, without putting the blame back on you as a complainer but as a productive concerned employee.  That will tell you all you need to know about what the boss thinks is ok, and if you need to move or stay with out a fight at work.  

[branny]

I would be saying to her "what is your problem" and if you have one let's solve it right now with the higher ups. She a miserable person and it needs to stop. Sorry you have to deal with aggressive territorial people.

[LizzieInSRQ]

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@ajsidney12 wrote:

Not knowing specifics of the actual comments, next time she does it warn her that you will report her for her behavior. You are in charge of children and her disrespecting you shows the kids that the behavior is acceptable, when in actuality she should be a good role model for them to follow.

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Why warn her?  Just do it.