READY FOR MORE WORDS?

Lindsays Grandma · ‎03-10-2010

1. I love being married. It's so great to find one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.

2. Love is telling someone their hair extensions are showing.

3. I miss crawling into a mans arms, kissing his neck, saying those three little words in his ear, "And another thing..."

4. I was married by a judge - I should have asked for a jury.

5. Marriage is really tough because you have to deal with feelings and lawyers.

6. Cable appointment - the cable repairman was on my street and asked me what time it was, I told him it is between 8:00 a.m. and 1:00 p.m..

7. I used to think I was indecisive, but now I'm not so sure.

8. It could be that your purpose in life is to serve as a warning to others.

9. Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.

10. The best things in life are actually really expensive.

11. The road to success is dotted with many tempting parking spaces.

12. Well - behaved women seldom make history.

13. A clear conscience is a sure sign of a bad memory.

14. Always remember you are unique - just like everybody else.

15. I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.

16. If at first you don't succeed, then sky diving definitely isn't for you.

17. Nothing is impossible, the word itself says, "I'm possible."

18. The difference between genius and stupidity is, genius has its limits.

19. The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.

20. When I hear somebody sigh, "Life is hard," I am always tempted to ask, "Compared to what?"

The moving finger writes; And having writ, Moves on: nor all your Piety nor Wit Shall lure it back to cancel half a Line Nor all your Tears Wash out a Word of it. Omar Khayam

appm · ‎04-17-2010

@Lindsays Grandma As usual, these are great. That "I'm possible" one (#17) is clever. I never looked at it that way.

Mimi 1883 · ‎03-15-2010

@Lindsays Grandma I think #6 is pretty funny.

F/N/A luvstogarden

OKPrincess · ‎03-10-2013

#9 my post retirement life 😁

Mindy D · ‎05-23-2010

#1 is very funny.

Porcelain · ‎02-19-2014

16 is pretty good. Thanks for the laugh!

When you’re accustomed to privilege, equality feels like oppression.
"Power without love is reckless and abusive, and love without power is sentimental and anemic." - Dr. Martin Luther King Jr