Reply
Respected Contributor
Posts: 3,055
Registered: ‎03-11-2010

My DH recently passed away and needless to say, I am a total wreck.  It is like my heart has been ripped out of my chest.  I cry all the time, especially in public which I cannot seem to stop.  My question is I am still wearing my wedding ring as I will always be his wife but it is getting more painful each day when I see it on my finger.  Do you still wear your ring, any feedback would be so appreciated.

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 5,297
Registered: ‎09-15-2016

Never cried at the funeral or in public, I just don't do that. I still wear my ring & will have it buried with me. Grief is different for everyone, you'll find your way. Blessings.

Respected Contributor
Posts: 2,736
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

@lovesallanimals.   I am so sorry for your loss.

 

I became a widow 5 years ago.  I didn't wear a ring all the time when my DH was alive.  I gained weight and my fingers swelled in the heat so rings were uncomfortable at times.

 

I quit wearing a ring for good pretty quickly.  It didn't seem right for me to keep wearing one.  It was easier not to look at it.

 

There are no rules about this and there is nothing wrong with continuing to wear your wedding ring.  Do what feels right for you.

Highlighted
Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,217
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

some bereaved wives wear their wedding rings on a chain around their necks 

I'm so very sorry for your loss. 

MICHIGAN STATE MOM
Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,112
Registered: ‎06-04-2012

@lovesallanimals 

 

My condolences to you.  Heart

 

If it is getting more painful by the day to see your wedding ring on your finger have you tried putting on a different ring to see how that feels?

 

I wish you the best. 

Honored Contributor
Posts: 13,593
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

@lovesallanimals - first, I am so sorry for your loss.  I often say that the loss of a spouse changes your DNA. I know it changed mine. In my opinion, it's something you never "get over".  It's something your learn to live with. Give yourself some grace and grieve as you feel you need to grieve. No one walks your grief journey except for you. 

My husband has been gone almost 5 years. I wore my engagement and wedding rings for a year and a half after his death. It was habit to wear them so I just did. I loved my rings. And then one day, I just stopped. No fanfare.  I had gained a little weight and it was a warm February day and I struggled one morning to get them on and I just decided that maybe it was time.  They're in my jewelry box and I see them all the time and love them just as much as I always did. But it wouldn't feel right to me to put them back on now. Not after this much time.

 

Again, my sympathies to you for this profound loss.  


Why is it, when I have a 50/50 guess at something, I'm always 100% wrong?
Valued Contributor
Posts: 714
Registered: ‎01-05-2020

@lovesallanimals 

 

My sincere condolences!

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 5,826
Registered: ‎01-25-2023

@lovesallanimals My sincerest condolences on such a loss. You are among friends, please allow us to help you carry this pain for you.

Lynn-Critter Lover!
(especially cats!)
Honored Contributor
Posts: 12,711
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

@lovesallanimals 

 

my deepest condolences to you.  I've been struggling a lot myself (my spouse passed 16 months ago) yes I still wear my wedding band.  My band is a ruby & diamond not traditional set.

 

You should do whatever you're comfortable with - as my grief counselor told me "it's a big loss which takes time to adjust".  We were together 52 years I met him when I was a teenager.

 

Please take all the time you need my thoughts are with you!

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 7,171
Registered: ‎01-14-2017

 

@lovesallanimals  My most sincere condolences for your loss, and I hope you are able to find some comfort, whatever you choose to do.