Community Chat

[lolakimono]

@MacDUFF

I doubt that I can say much on this without it going to Poofland, and without revealing too much about where I live and work.  The district is quite diverse, with student demographics that range from upper class, double parent, college educated households to FARMS (Free and Reduced Meals Students) making up the majority of the student body.  Some schools are largely English Language Learners (ELLS), with a transient population while others are magnet schools for STEM (Science Technology Engineering Mathematics) or performing arts.  There have been incidents of racial tension, violence, threats, etc. that mirror some of the things transmitted daily on the national news.  I have had students in Spanish class talking about building the wall, with no regard to their immigrant classmates.  I think that many kids are so wrapped up in themselves, and in social media, that they forget that they are not anonymous, and the things they say/do affect others beyond a simple post or comment.  

[LTT1]

@lolakimono

My answer will be superficial since I have not read all of the posts.

Sympathsize: “I understand you are having a hard time and I’m very sorry.:

Empathsize: “I too have been in your situation so I can envision and actually feel the same (or some of the same) feelings you are having.

[MacDUFF]

@lolakimono

I hear you about Poofland, which is why I can't get into it too deeply.   

Your post brought up one of my concerns about where the empathy training/restorative justice thing could lead...for example, diminishing (or worse) our 1st Amendment.   At what point do we end up with a list of subjects and/or words that have been approved by TPTB, all other subjects/words prohibited?

If I put my mind to it, I could come up with valid, logical-sounding arguments for forbidding almost every single subject/word under the sun (forgive a bit of hyperbole) on the grounds that they have the potential to offend someone or some group somewhere.

Also, I would not be able to give any RJ-type program carte blanche (in penology or education)...I would have quite a few provisos.  (Generally speaking, I think it's a worthy idea.)

I've been around the block many times...ask me if I would believe TPTB when they say some RJ-type program will in no way impact the 1st Amendment...no way will it totally replace punitive punishment or rule of law.   Been there, done that.  Too many programs/laws/ideas, etc. have morphed into something completely different from what was originally agreed upon and intended.

Again, too bad we can't discuss this in depth.  Have a great evening!

@Noel7

[Porcelain]

I see empathy as being similar to method acting. We've all experienced the same basic emotions in life. Usually by the age of three! At times we've all felt lonely or misunderstood or furious or thrilled or nervous or blissful. The reason for the feeling is situation-specific but the emotional result is fairly universal.

You just do your best to guess the emotion the other person is probably feeling and extrapolate to a time you felt that feeling. If they let you know your guess was wrong, you apologize quickly, if need be, and change track.

If you've ever cried from watching a commecial with an old dog in it or a budweiser clydesdale, you've experienced empathy since you've never been a dog or a horse.

For me, this happens automatically. So I consider myself pretty empathetic. I have to pull myself back pretty often and lighten the heck up!

Sympathy is the social performing of rituals of condolence. I'm sorry for your loss. My thoughts are with you. Etc. You say it automatically because you know you're supposed to. Often, sympathy is all that is wanted or expected, given the circumstance. Empathy would be too costly for either or both parties in terms of time or emotion. It's like saying thank you vs expressing true gratitude. Both are important in society.

[software]

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@Noel7 wrote:

@software

Some well known MD has studied them for a long time, he came up with a test/list of personality traits, took it himself and discovered he fit the profile.  He thought about it a long time and realized it really was him, but he was one who never even thought of hurting anyone. 

I think that was the start of others thinking it was a spectrum.  My point is, don't worry about it

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True, no worries.   It's just that in my studies of "great men of history" what do they have in common?   Why are they successful when others with the same intelligence, opportunity etc don't make it.   It's an interesting discussion.

[Yardlie]