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Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,200
Registered: ‎06-18-2018

Re: Problem Student on University Campus

[ Edited ]

 


@mom2four0418 wrote:

@Rockinista wrote:

I would call the police chief, not the school.  They're too invested in keeping their name untarnished, especially since the boy's parents are well connected there. I would only speak to the chief, I would surely ask him or her if your name will be keep anonymous. You should leave that conversation being 100% assured that no stone is being unturned.

 

If you're not happy with the reassurances you get from the chief (don't expect to hear information that would jeopardize their investigation), then I would contact the FBI, verbally and in writing.

 

Do not call the news media or do anything that may get back to, irritate or anger this young man.  Don't call a local politician, if they maybe could also know the parents.

 

Remind your son to do everything he can to hide his daily whereabouts from this guy too.

 

I wish you the best.


Calling the campus police chief is calling the school. No agency is as highly trained as the FBI. Their agents know exactly how to interview potential witnesses while respecting confidentiality.  

 



I did not say to call the campus police.  Where did I write that?  Second, where did I say not to call the FBI?  I did say to call them if they felt the need. 

I don't think you read my post.


Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,685
Registered: ‎04-23-2010

Re: Problem Student on University Campus


@Rockinista wrote:

 


@mom2four0418 wrote:

@Rockinista wrote:

I would call the police chief, not the school.  They're too invested in keeping their name untarnished, especially since the boy's parents are well connected there. I would only speak to the chief, I would surely ask him or her if your name will be keep anonymous. You should leave that conversation being 100% assured that no stone is being unturned.

 

If you're not happy with the reassurances you get from the chief (don't expect to hear information that would jeopardize their investigation), then I would contact the FBI, verbally and in writing.

 

Do not call the news media or do anything that may get back to, irritate or anger this young man.  Don't call a local politician, if they maybe could also know the parents.

 

Remind your son to do everything he can to hide his daily whereabouts from this guy too.

 

I wish you the best.


Calling the campus police chief is calling the school. No agency is as highly trained as the FBI. Their agents know exactly how to interview potential witnesses while respecting confidentiality.  

 



I did not say to call the campus police.  Where did I write that?  Second, where did I say not to call the FBI?  I did say to call them if they felt the need. 

I don't think you read my post.
The OP stated that the "ban" had not gone into full effect because the police chief had not signed it. Most campuses are run by their own police force. I may have mistakenly thought that the students were dealing with the campus police chief. If not, then the city/town chief has not acted. I never said that you did not want her to call the FBI and I did read your post.






Trusted Contributor
Posts: 1,200
Registered: ‎06-18-2018

Re: Problem Student on University Campus

@mom2four0418   Ok , we're good.

Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 7,020
Registered: ‎03-14-2010

Re: Problem Student on University Campus

report your concerns directly to the university law enforcement as well as the administration; too often the admin is not made aware of potential dangers....many assume they are aware when they are not; I don't think I would alert the media; the guy making the threat may enjoy the attention and that could escalate whatever he does, if anything
If his ban from campus needs the police chief's approval, why the delay? If he violates the ban, they could pick him up, and at least everyone would know his whereabouts.
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Esteemed Contributor
Posts: 6,557
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Problem Student on University Campus

Thank you for your advice everyone. I can tell you right now that you all made me feel better about the whole situation.

 

I did call this morning. I don't know the former student's last name, so I was mostly askng questions without being specific. It turns out they have MANY situations like this! That was news to me, and isn't it sad we have to live in a world like this. Each one is investigated thoroughly.

 

This former student was following a particular girl. She was in the group that met on campus, so he knew where she was going. He seemed to be trying to get her attention however he could. He is not allowed anywhere near her.

 

They told me the university police and the city police have both interviewed him and determined there is no reason for any other student to be concerned. Of course they would not tell me specifics, which I certainly understand.

 

I think DS just panicked because he knew him at one time. When I talked to DS a while ago he was more relaxed and said he was scared but he never thought this former student was singling him out with his threats. Being stressed in the middle of finals might have had a lot to do with the way DS was taking it. 

 

I did tell DS to get rides home at night from his friends who have cars (he is about a ten-minute walk from campus) and he assured me he would. I also told him he needed to try to let this go and concentrate on finals. His last paper is due today! 

 

Again, I really appreciate your being there for me. It's hard to know what to do and what to say to your child! 

 

 

Honored Contributor
Posts: 15,984
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Problem Student on University Campus

@beach-mom  I will say it now ,because you did it first. This happens more times than some people have had hot dinners. If the police called the FBI every time some blowhard made threats ,they would never be off the phone

 

Having said that ,they still must be vigilant ,because ,one never knows when it might happen...but usually they happen with no prior warning

Respected Contributor
Posts: 2,207
Registered: ‎04-04-2015

Re: Problem Student on University Campus

So what are they doing to protect the girl - the one they thiink is really the only person at risk?  They told him to stay away from her???  Wow that will be effective.

 

 

It is just tragic how many kids clearly signal they need help - and they don't get it.

 

And I'm sure if the girl were to arm herself with a gun - she would be the one arrested - gun free zones and all.  

 

But then, even if she did, that's no protection if he decides to blow himself up in a crowd to "show her."

 

The whole situation is out of control.

Super Contributor
Posts: 287
Registered: ‎08-29-2013

Re: Problem Student on University Campus


@beach-mom wrote:

I'm going to get a little personal, but I really would like your advice.

 

There is a student at DS' university. He dropped out in his senior year (this past year). As alumni, both of his parents are very active there. The past week he has been going around saying something big is coming and things like, "you have no idea what's going to happen."

 

DS knew him. He dated one of DS' good friends their freshman and sophomore years. She broke up with him. She graduated last year and works in another state. DS saw him from time to time, but they were not friends and weren't in the same department. 

 

A few days ago he apparently stalked a girl DS knows and was banned from campus. Last night DS was in a study group that was meeting at someone's apartment. They moved the meeting on campus to be safer because they knew he was banned. He walked in - while they were meeting, and started making more vague threats.

 

One of the girls left and called the police. They came and questioned him for about 20 minutes and let him go home. They then told the students there was nothing they could do because he hadn't "done" anything. And the ban from campus had not gone into full effect yet because it has to be approved by the chief of police.

 

The kids are in the middle of finals. DS can't concentrate, and the news last night didn't help. He said he didn't sleep all night. He lives off campus. 

 

I don't know what to tell him. The police are very aware of the situation, and I'm sure the university is watching things carefully too. 

 

I'd like to think this is just a kid trying to get attention, but with everything going on, how do you know? I keep telling myself his parents are very connected to the university and to the whole community. 

 

Do you think I should contact the university, or just let the police handle things?


I would run it past the Uni.  Because why is he hanging around and going to study groups if he's dropped out?  As a student, myself, believe me when I tell you crazies abound.  And now he's probably super pizzed at the study group for calling the police on him. 

Respected Contributor
Posts: 3,221
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Problem Student on University Campus

I truly hope that some or all of the principals in this situation take action as soon as possible, or the next headline on the news will say something like "we tried alerting the authorities, but nothing was done."

~The only difference between this place and the Titanic is that the Titanic had a band.~
Respected Contributor
Posts: 3,191
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Problem Student on University Campus

Without going into specifics, I will say that there was a similar incident at my nursing school by a student who was kicked out of the program and he made threats. He had police surveillance on him and at graduation we had undercover cops all over the place. A few students chose not to attend, unfortunately.