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04-23-2017 01:05 AM
IMHO a gift card is barely one step,above cash in a envelope. No effort or thought required. IF you are being pressured to give a gift and resent it turn it into something that does some good. Make a donation to a charity of your choosing and inform the ungrateful recipient that is their gift from you. YOu have now met the gift giving requirement and done something worthwhile.
04-23-2017 03:51 AM
I enjoy choosing gifts too but I think gifting $ or gift cards is appropriate as long as the recipient enjoys this type of present. I have family members that really appreciate this type of gift. If they are happy with the gift, than I am too.
04-23-2017 08:28 AM
@Hayfield wrote:My two children are 27 & 31 and unless they give me a list that's very specific, I don't usually buy them something since their taste is way different than mine. Any time they give the link to the websit and color & size of something they want, they always wear it.
Agree! My daughter is going to 25, she has a very specific taste in clothes and loves to shop. I make a gift card tree with all her favorite stores. She holds on to them for a good sale. She loves it!
04-23-2017 10:59 AM
@pattypeep wrote:@LilacTree I stand up and applaud you !! I am in total agreement. My dh's family is large and we are constantly sent invitations and announcements to weddings, showers, anniversaries, babies, graduations. Never a thank you. With one nephew we received a baby shower announcement and almost on the same day, received a brief wedding gift thank you. I guess they thought they had a better chance of a baby gift if we were thanked for the wedding gift. Good grief. They are now divorced. I told my dh that enough is enough. There will be a card and that is all. I am so sorry for you @LilacTree. It is very disheartening to say the least.
Remember those cards that had printed "whatever you sent, whatever you gave, thank you very much." I haven't seen one in a long time, but thought they were the worst. Most of the time they weren't even signed.
I've never been that turned off if I didn't receive a thank you card (which I rarely do, but that's the times I guess). Usually I had given the gift directly to the person, so it was never a big deal to me.
However that "whatever" card would go right into the trash.
04-23-2017 11:53 AM - edited 04-23-2017 11:56 AM
Life has been better since I joined the "let's not do gifts" movement. Like the OP I tired of giving gifts that, for whatever reason, seemed to go unnoticed...figuring my not giving them would be unnoticed as well.
I still do "this looked like you" and "I thought you would like this" and "I thought of you when I saw this" gfts. Because giving them makes feel good, not obligated. But gifts because of a date on a calendar? That's over.
04-23-2017 03:42 PM
@SunValley wrote:I enjoy choosing gifts too but I think gifting $ or gift cards is appropriate as long as the recipient enjoys this type of present. I have family members that really appreciate this type of gift. If they are happy with the gift, than I am too.
I agree. I have friends and family who like actual gifts, some like cash, and others prefer gift cards. I have no problem giving each of them what I know they like. When my son moved into his first apartment, I knew that cash and gift cards would enable him to buy what he wanted to get it all set up. And when a friend finally got the buffet/bar she had been saving up for, I gave her a gift card to a store that had the wineglasses and accessories that she liked. It all depends on the people involved and what's going on in their lives at the time. Sometimes cash and gift cards are the very best gift.
So I have no problem giving them,and quite honestly there have been times when I was very grateful to receive them. (One of my favorite gifts ever was a very generous gift card for Barnes & Noble. I was like a kid in a candy store. So much fun to wander the aisles, look at books, and make choices!)
04-23-2017 03:50 PM
I wonder if the gift giving thing is more of a womens thing? I have found that men are not really concerned about getting gifts,and much of the time do not know what to give.
04-23-2017 04:02 PM
@goldensrbest wrote:I wonder if the gift giving thing is more of a womens thing? I have found that men are not really concerned about getting gifts,and much of the time do not know what to give.
I disagree. I've received some wonderful gifts from men, and my son is absolutely 100% the best gift-giver I've ever known. My ex-husband was pretty good too.
That's just my experience, of course, but I think men do love to receive gifts and can be very good at giving too.
04-23-2017 06:02 PM - edited 04-23-2017 06:03 PM
We just usually get together for a meal for Birthdays but give gifts at Christmas.
Actually, if I see something I know they would like, I will get it for them without an occasion.
The latest was the upside down umbrella for my daughter because she has to park outside at work now. She liked it so much...she also took mine because she needs one in the car and one in the office!
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