Community Chat

[SouthernBee]

@Yahooey : Sorry about the problems with the yarn but love the beautiful colors.

[SouthernBee]

@MyShadowLove : Beautiful flowers.

[Mj12]

GM Preds & friends! 

[SouthernBee]

Good morning y'all: I need to find me a good multiple vitamin, tired of being tired.

Need to share a few things.

Pancake widow stopped by the other day. Our church joined another church group and our  area agency for elderly and handicapped to have a food box for the community. Pancake went and she was given the extras for herself, our other friend and me. Yes, I appreciated her help and the food. Mine was in a tote bag and  box included a big bunch of collards, carrots , potatoes, apples, bell pepper , and a water mellon. I thanked her. The she stated: I know how picky you are about your collards and made sure you received the biggest and beautiful bunch. I just stared a her. I didn't feel good and this was the day that would have been my brother's birthday. Yes, the night and morning before my brother died, she was with me at the hospice facility and I will never forget this. But with her visit and food delivery didn't have the energy for a long talk or discussion and told her. She decided to stay. Our church has several different groups for monthly fellowship called Brother's Keepers: she has a group and for the last two years has tried to get us to leave our preferred group to join hers. DH and I have repeatedly stressed "no thank you", but today she started that conversation🙄🙄🙄. I told her not interested and do not ever ask us again. I told her that I was tired and needed to rest. She stated she would contact me about walking. She and other friend are in the Church book club that meets on Thursday morning and trying to get me going again( previously tried it but they insist on having everyone bring something for a pot luck lunch and they have a tendency to read the same books over and over: so not interested).

Pancake called this morning and tried to catch me off guard. She asked me how to cook collards. Then stated she would pick me up around 11:00 to include going to the book club and afterwards we could walk. Told her not interested in joining the book club . Told her not dressed to go out and was doing laundry. It's all about her, what she says and does , her friends need to do whatever she says or has scheduled. I will try to have a conversation with her when feeling better.

Also , I gave her a letter a couple years ago asking to suspend all gift giving and she has not honored my request. So on this visit she mentioned our friend and my birthday being soon and we needed to plan a party. Told her that I wasn't interested and please exclude me: she replied : " No".😮😮😮🙄🙄🙄!!!! My birthday will be on a Sunday and DH and I have all ready decided to miss that service. My other friend and another church friends birthday are the Saturday before that Sunday. Years past, I would go with all these ladies for birthday lunch, party or what ever and it was just too much plus Pancake all ways called the night before or morning of the event to notify everyone. Yes, I can afford the gifts but not all the drama and stress. Thank you for letting me vent.🤗❤

[SouthernBee]

@Mj12 : Hello and hope you are feeling better. We have really enjoyed the tomatoes from BIL garden. How is your garden?

[geezerette]

@SouthernBee 

I'm sorry your pancake friend has put you in this position. ☹️

I can see where you would be torn.  You do appreciate her kindnesses but not her pushiness to always do what she wants you to do.  

Unfortunately it sounds like there isn't a way to get her to change.  She obviously hasn't caught on when you try to explain how you feel, or she flat out just doesn't care.

I think the only thing you can do at this point--unless you're prepared to drop her totally and miss out on what you do enjoy about her--is just to use your health as an excuse not to participate.  When you don't want to participate in a scheme of hers, just say you're not up to it.  I do this all the time, and frankly, it's not lying because I'm not up to it.  Whether I just don't want to listen to someone or I don't have the physical energy to deal with what they want to do (or both!).

Do your other friends feel the same way about her?  If so, maybe you all can come up with some sort of strategy to deal with her.😉

Venting is always allowed and even encouraged! ❤️

[MyShadowLove]

Good Afternoon Preds' Friends...

@Mj12 ...Good to see you!...I have a close neighbor friend who will be moving to Maryland next week...Her son and his family live there so her and her husband want to be closer to them and be able to see them more often...I am going to miss her terribly and, at the same time, I am very happy for her.

@Yahooey ...Your berries and jam are perfection!...What a picture of yummy delight!...I hope you don't mind but I just grabbed a handful of the berries to add to my yogurt tomorrow morning....It sounds like you will be "Jammin" at a Jam Party" with family and friends...LOL...What a great way to celebrate "thy fruits of thy labor"!

@cowboy sam ...I sure hope that you are feeling much better today and well rested...I'm happy that my "Joyous" flowers brought smiles to you and everyone!....First thing I do every morning is greet my flowers around our yard...great way to start the day...They are also looking much happier now that we are having some sunny weather!

@SouthernBee...I'm sorry that your Pancake friend is causing you so much stress....Wise words from @geezerette ...She isn't going to change so the best way to handle her is to distance yourself as much as you can and don't go along with any of her "orders"....just be yourself and do everything "your way"...I know...easier said than done...but you have to think of yourself and your health and she is toxic.

Waving To Everyone who visits!...Beautiful day here...Everyone enjoy!  

     

[SouthernBee]

@geezerette : Thank you. Plus for the last two weeks receiving 20 to 25 spam calls per day. I have the black call blocker with the red button and call block button on the phone and busy doing both. DH doesn't want to get rid of the land line phone. Can't get anything done or take a nap during the day.

The other friend doesn't like what Pancake is doing but she will not say anything because in January she will be going with Pancake to Israel. They are busy talking and shopping. I haven't been invited on any shopping trips.

Other friend also upset because growing up her birthday party was always shared with other relatives that had the same birthday. This friend and the other friends birthday is on the 29th, we're are not as close with this extra lady but Pancake insist on including her. This extra lady is very jealous so to keep the drama down we have tried to give them the same gifts and usually gift cards. Sad because Pancake could take one friend out for breakfast , just the two together and then later take the extra lady out for a late lunch but she insist that isn't an option. Just crazy. We're supposed to be adults and not act like elementary kids.

I would like to send something to the other lady for her birthday but she will probably tell Pancake and the extra lady and I can't risk that.😮😮😮🙄🙄🙄

[geezerette]

@SouthernBee 

Oh my.  I can see what you mean about all the "drama".  I couldn't handle that either!

Do you think this Pancake widow is bored and lonely so she creates all these constant situations on purpose for attention and company?  Or was she always like this?  Either way, I don't think there's much you can do about it.  Like the other Pancakes I guess you just have to endure them.😩

Is she one of the spam calls you're getting?  😂😂  (Just kidding, of course.)😉

[SouthernBee]

@geezerette : Thanks. No - Pancake isn't bored or lonely. She recently moved one of her brothers to her house because he became homeless and he has helped alot with house repairs. She is busy with the grand kids because they need help or transportation. She has a family night dinner every Thursday plus various church activities during the week.🤔🙄