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Honored Contributor
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Registered: ‎10-03-2011

You've gotten some good advice here.  One thing I would add, as the mom of a recent groom, is that you please keep the groom's parents, especially his mom, in the loop and maybe even ask her for some imput, recommendations, advice, etc.  Without going into much detail, I will tell you that our for son's wedding I/we felt very excluded from most of the planning.

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Posts: 19,474
Registered: ‎03-09-2010

Re: Planning Wedding

[ Edited ]

@JeanLouiseFinch wrote:

You've gotten some good advice here.  One thing I would add, as the mom of a recent groom, is that you please keep the groom's parents, especially his mom, in the loop and maybe even ask her for some imput, recommendations, advice, etc.  Without going into much detail, I will tell you that our for son's wedding I/we felt very excluded from most of the planning.


JLF...I agree with you on that....When our daughter got married, I kept in close contact with the Groom's mom, we got together quite often for lunch, and just to talk as we were getting to know each other better as well.

 

Now my sister's son is getting married next month, and the Bride's mom has kept in close contact with her, and she said it has made everything so much easier, and she felt like she has had a little more input into everything as well....

 

@Twins Mom@JeanLouiseFinch. By the way my nephew who is getting married next month is an identical twin!!!!! Of course his Best Man is his twin brother! lol...  

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If any friends or family have talents with baking, flower arranging, making favors - that's another way to cut down on costs. Definitely sticking to a budget and trying not to overspend is important.

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Posts: 16,608
Registered: ‎03-11-2010

going thru this now, although my daughter has done most of it. she said to me

the wedding industry exists to sell you stuff most of which you don't need. 

she also said there are no options between pizza in the backyard and 20k$  

 

also don't rule out the 2nd hand wedding dress sites, can save a ton of money

 

once you pick the venue, then you can decide everything

 

also there are tons of website to use   Zola, weddingwire etc  

 

 

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Posts: 2,187
Registered: ‎03-13-2010

Re: Planning Wedding

[ Edited ]

@Cumbercookie13 wrote:

If any friends or family have talents with baking, flower arranging, making favors - that's another way to cut down on costs. Definitely sticking to a budget and trying not to overspend is important.


@Twins Mom- My niece just got married.  The couple were given a specific dollar amount by parents and told anything over that, was on their dime.  Niece and two of her very good friends all were getting married this year and got info to websites where couples were selling off some of the stuff from their wedding (niece bought a bunch of table centerpieces which were very cute (small lanterns with battery tea lights inside), etc) and a combination of fake greenery along with real flowers. 

 

Another website listed many cost cutting ideas other brides were sharing.  She got married outside on the lawn of a club and when you arrived and walked up to where the sidewalk began you followed it to chairs where guests would be seated.  She had a sign made and placed right where you would go down the aisle to be seated.  Sign said - "Welcome to our Beginning", the date and under that was "The (their last name)".  On wedding sites, those signs cost $85 to customize.  Site said or just go to Home Depot/Lowe's, get a piece of plywood cut to a specific size and there was a link to an Etsy site.  On Etsy someone makes a sticky banner that you customize to the size needed and writes whatever you want.  She got to pick the style writing she wanted, the color of the background and color of the writing and she had a scrolling ivy design just along the top.  Etsy seller mailed you the banner and you just peeled off the backing and adhered to the plywood.  It was very very pretty and only cost $10. They had another made they leaned against their table at the reception with different information and that was another $10. 

 

For favors for guests she went to an Amazon site and ordered tiny apothecary jars, ordered pink and blue custom made M&Ms - some with their names and the date, others said Love, Marriage, etc).   Using their home printer they customized/printed label they stuck to the outside.  All these homemade things were very very pretty - and all looked like something gotten or ordered off a wedding site. Lots of ideas probably on Pinterest as well.

 

 

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Registered: ‎02-14-2017
Give some serious thought to hiring a planner. I’m planning a wedding now and my planner has been amazing. The discount I got on linen rentals using her connections almost completely covered her fee.

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Posts: 2,038
Registered: ‎04-03-2016

@JeanLouiseFinch

 

Just went that, too, and I totally agree with keeping groom's mom in the loop.  I just felt lilke I had to have a starting point before I contact.  Right now, I don't want to fall apart from the get-go! 

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Posts: 20,569
Registered: ‎03-12-2010

budget is most important. I couldn't afford nothing so dh and I had a very simple wedding at the church we attended. the reception was held at the church hall. i was able to find a caterer at the place where I worked. She did this part time. She was good, had plenty of food made. Just simple sandwiches, and nuts, and other goodies. 

 

Stick to that budget. You don't need a full blowen wedding if the "kids" can't afford it. Celebrate and enjoy, just stick to budget and don't over invite anyone and everyone.

 

I invited all the people I worked with and NO one came.

 

this wedding was done with $250.00 back in 1970 which was a huge amount of money for me,since I paid for entire wedding myself. My parents would not help me. 

 

still together 48 yrs next month.

Honored Contributor
Posts: 8,179
Registered: ‎03-10-2010

Re: Planning Wedding

[ Edited ]

The one who is paying the most should have the most input IMO, or be in the loop. Unless they say do what you want.  I only got a tiny bit from my folks, and we were on our own. Most couples I know pay for their weddings themselves.

 

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@CelticCrafter wrote:

We will be in the same situation soon.  Poor guy is getting up the nerve to ask us, I can tell he's so close to asking and then kind of shies away.  I mean it's not like we're ogres or anything!

 

We have decided that we will give them a check to do with what they wish, pay for the dress and that's it.  We aren't paying for the entire shindig - the guest list is too lopsided and I'm not inviting people just for the sake of evening things up.


@CelticCrafter You are smart. Son is getting married at the end of the month and in hindsight I wish we just wrote a check. It is also a lopsided wedding, 40 on our side and 120 on the other. 

We are paying for flowers, rehearsal dinner and farewell breakfast.