Community Chat

[tansy]

I am beginning to think of the mother character in Ordinary People:/

[Nancy Drew]

On 4/6/2014 serenity4ever said:

On 4/6/2014 Nancy Drew said:

On 4/6/2014 serenity4ever said:

What transpired right before she called you an ice queen? What was the conversation about? Anyone who would call their MIL an ice queen must be aware that it could put quite a wedge in the relationship. How has your relationship been prior to her striking out at you?

I thought for the past ten years it was good. I am in shock. I was dropping off the 7 year old and he was telling all the fun things we did. She pulls me away into another room and that is when she said it.

She probably senses you aren't her biggest fan..... You said that you would rather have a root canal then be in the same room with her? She is boring?

Subtle nuances in behavior can speak volumes about how we really feel. For the sake of your grandchildren and son try and get along with her and spend some time with her. Who knows, you may find something you have in common besides the grandchildren. And remember your son loves her.....there is nothing that is going to alienate your son more than if you have issues with his wife. For the sake of the grands and your son, try and find a way to make the peace...

I am of the mindset once your son marries the wife is his main priority. That is the way for my husband and I. I get that. That is why I am not calling him and complain and I never would. That would only hurt my relationship with him. I have never had issues with her. I feel like she has issue with me. I thought by giving them plenty of space was the way to go. I am not the type who wants to meddle or be involved. I have my own life. Even if they have problems my go to saying is you'll figure it out. I thought I was a good MIL and this was win/win. I thought she would be one DIL who always said "she never interfered."

[Lila Belle]

Both women have something in common: they love the same guy and his children. If the DIL has noticed it so has the son. Not cool.

[dmod nj]

On 4/6/2014 tansy said: I am beginning to think of the mother character in Ordinary People:/

OMG, tansy, I thought the same thing.

I was reading and that was my first thought.

[tansy]

On 4/6/2014 dmod nj said:

On 4/6/2014 tansy said: I am beginning to think of the mother character in Ordinary People:/

OMG, tansy, I thought the same thing.

I was reading and that was my first thought.

Cue the Twilight Theme...

[scotttie]

On 4/6/2014 VanSleepy said: Roles are reversed here, but I could not stand to be alone with my mother-in-law. I figured she felt the same, but she would come visit for four weeks every year. It's not that I didn't care for/about her, but we had absolutely nothing to say to each other and it was torture. So I totally get Nancy's not wanting to be buddies with her DIL, and she needn't be.

I get it too, really. Don't know why being polite and taking the kids once in a while isn't enough? Why does she want to be buddies?

[Nancy Drew]

On 4/6/2014 bikerbabe said:

This may be unpopular for me to say but you are hurt she called you an ice queen but look at the number of times you've called her boring in your posts on this thread. You've admitted you don't like to spend time with her. She clearly senses your aloofness, hence the ice queen comment. It's possible that you've been hurting her feelings for years.

Just another possible perspective on this.

I am starting to think that also. I would never want to hurt her. Now how do I change my mind as I do find her boring?. I can't suddenly find her interesting.

[stevieb]

On 4/6/2014 croemer said:

Do you feel she is wanting to spend time with you or as a babysitter?That would make a huge difference. If she really wants some time with you...I would take her to lunch or something 1x a month or something. Whatever you two would enjoy together.

That would be my question.

[Nancy Drew]

On 4/6/2014 Lila Belle said:

On 4/6/2014 Nancy Drew said:

On 4/6/2014 croemer said:

Well...she sure handled it poorly. What fun you guys are going to have on the Holidays.

Yeah....I'm having Easter. I have to be myself as I can't be anything other. As the Ice Queen I have thought about playing the song from Frozen...Let it go Let it go the cold never bothered me anyway.

poor girl.

I'm joking. She hurt my feelings so I am just being sarcastic. I have never ever said anything to her about her character. Why would I? Yet it is okay if she says it to me. Poor me!

[dmod nj]

On 4/6/2014 tansy said:

On 4/6/2014 dmod nj said:

On 4/6/2014 tansy said: I am beginning to think of the mother character in Ordinary People:/

OMG, tansy, I thought the same thing.

I was reading and that was my first thought.

Cue the Twilight Theme...

or...........GMTA.