MIL DIL issue - Page 6

Lucky Charm · ‎03-09-2010

Ouch!! You'd rather have a root canal than be alone with her? That's harsh. Even if someone were 'boring', you wouldn't rather have a root canal. I think there are other issues you have with her.

Think about it, a boring person, you can still enjoy conversation with, even if you have to prompt them a little. Going to the movies together, no need for conversation until after the movie. Go out for a bite and talk about what you liked or didn't like about the movie.

Explain what you mean by a boring time with her.

croemer · ‎03-10-2010

Well...she sure handled it poorly. What fun you guys are going to have on the Holidays.

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**Careful... I have caps lock and I am not afraid to use it.**

Lila Belle · ‎01-24-2013

On 4/6/2014 Nancy Drew said:
On 4/6/2014 serenity4ever said:
What transpired right before she called you an ice queen? What was the conversation about? Anyone who would call their MIL an ice queen must be aware that it could put quite a wedge in the relationship. How has your relationship been prior to her striking out at you?

I thought for the past ten years it was good. I am in shock. I was dropping off the 7 year old and he was telling all the fun things we did. She pulls me away into another room and that is when she said it.

Bingo.

She senses that you don't really seem to care about her.

Nancy Drew · ‎03-11-2010

On 4/6/2014 croemer said:
Well...she sure handled it poorly. What fun you guys are going to have on the Holidays.

Yeah....I'm having Easter. I have to be myself as I can't be anything other. As the Ice Queen I have thought about playing the song from Frozen...Let it go Let it go the cold never bothered me anyway.

Wrong is still wrong just because you benefited from it.

serenity4ever · ‎11-04-2013

On 4/6/2014 Nancy Drew said:
On 4/6/2014 serenity4ever said:
What transpired right before she called you an ice queen? What was the conversation about? Anyone who would call their MIL an ice queen must be aware that it could put quite a wedge in the relationship. ${#emotions_dlg.sad}$ How has your relationship been prior to her striking out at you?

I thought for the past ten years it was good. I am in shock. I was dropping off the 7 year old and he was telling all the fun things we did. She pulls me away into another room and that is when she said it.

She probably senses you aren't her biggest fan..... You said that you would rather have a root canal then be in the same room with her? She is boring?

Subtle nuances in behavior can speak volumes about how we really feel. For the sake of your grandchildren and son try and get along with her and spend some time with her. Who knows, you may find something you have in common besides the grandchildren. And remember your son loves her.....there is nothing that is going to alienate your son more than if you have issues with his wife. For the sake of the grands and your son, try and find a way to make the peace...

bikerbabe · ‎03-09-2010

This may be unpopular for me to say but you are hurt she called you an ice queen but look at the number of times you've called her boring in your posts on this thread. You've admitted you don't like to spend time with her. She clearly senses your aloofness, hence the ice queen comment. It's possible that you've been hurting her feelings for years.

Just another possible perspective on this.

Lila Belle · ‎01-24-2013

On 4/6/2014 Nancy Drew said:
On 4/6/2014 croemer said:
Well...she sure handled it poorly. What fun you guys are going to have on the Holidays.

Yeah....I'm having Easter. I have to be myself as I can't be anything other. As the Ice Queen I have thought about playing the song from Frozen...Let it go Let it go the cold never bothered me anyway.

poor girl.

scotttie · ‎03-09-2010

On 4/6/2014 Nancy Drew said:
On 4/6/2014 croemer said:
Well...she sure handled it poorly. What fun you guys are going to have on the Holidays.

Yeah....I'm having Easter. I have to be myself as I can't be anything other. As the Ice Queen I have thought about playing the song from Frozen...Let it go Let it go the cold never bothered me anyway.

You sound like my kind of gal.

I have sympathy for you. I can usually have a good time with anyone but there is this one woman....being with her is excruciating. If your dil is like that...oh boy. You have my sympathy.

Lucky Charm · ‎03-09-2010

On 4/6/2014 Nancy Drew said:
On 4/6/2014 Lila Belle said:
Why are you focusing on the babysitting and not hanging with her ? that's what I think you are missing here.

You are right. The babysitting is easier to deal with. I would rather have a root canal than be alone with her. Either I will have to man up and be with her or she will just have her get over my iciness.

That speaks volumes. She may be correct in thinking you are an ice queen. She shouldn't have said it to you, perhaps.

VanSleepy · ‎10-05-2010

Roles are reversed here, but I could not stand to be alone with my mother-in-law. I figured she felt the same, but she would come visit for four weeks every year. It's not that I didn't care for/about her, but we had absolutely nothing to say to each other and it was torture. So I totally get Nancy's not wanting to be buddies with her DIL, and she needn't be.